"Y'know," Irene said as everyone filed into the Danger Shop -- today programmed to look, perhaps unsurprisingly, like the formalwear area of an upscale department store, "prom's one of those things that's really starting to catch on, where I'm from, but sadly isn't something I grew up with. We had formals, of course, but never...prom, like in American films."
She sighed heavily. Because her life was hard without prom, of course, even if she was in a position now to wear a
ladies' tuxedo to work when she felt like it.
"In any case -- for some of you, this may be your very first formal event, or your very last for a long while. Some of you may not be old enough for prom, for which I apologize because you're still stuck playing dress-up with us today. Think of it as practice." She flashed a smile. "But in any case -- the term formal, when it comes to fashion, has some fairly strict rules. Ladies -- you're expected to wear a gown that reaches the floor, and gents, you're expected to be in a tux with a tie. Jewelry and accessories are at your discretion, though I implore you to wear matching or coordinating shoes, please, because it will look better."
She paused, looked down at what she was wearing, and added, "Of course, certain rules are meant to be broken, so don't feel compelled to stick to that too carefully. What I want you focusing on today is finding something that you feel comfortable wearing. Look for high-caliber fabrics and fit -- remember, you have to wear this bloody thing all night, and even if you think that strapping yourself into something held together by wishes looks sexy as hell, remember that even the very best tape doesn't always hold up on a warm dance floor."
She waved out towards the clothes. "Go try things on. Play. Experiment. Try different colors. If you're looking for a tux, remember that you want satin here," she gestured, "on your lapels, and running down the line of your trouser leg. And I must emphasize: if you wear a black trouser and put on a brown shoe, I might well cry. It will do you no favors, personal style or no. Just please don't. Oh! And if you absolutely fall in love with anything you see, come find me. I've programmed in actual things you can order online, so we can have it rushed here by Saturday if you meet your soulmate."