Because of You. // One Tree Hill // Brooke Davis & Nathan Scott // 010. Years.
Title: Because of You.
Fandom: One Tree Hill.
Characters: Brooke Davis/Nathan Scott, with an OC.
Prompt: 010 - Years.
Word Count: 1,467.
Rating: PG-13. Has a brief sex reference.
Summary: “Well, hello to you too, Brooke,” he smiled. It was half-hearted, timid; as if he were afraid she’d claw his eyes out. Which, at this point in time, was very tempting.
Author's Note: Sequel to When You Say You Love Me.
Table here.
She had moved to New York to get away from it all. Lucas and Peyton getting together had killed her, even though she said it was okay, and seeing the happily married Nathan and Haley… Well, that made her physically ill.
It had been five years, five long years since she set foot in Tree Hill. She wasn’t going back any time soon, either. New York had been good to her. The fast-paced city and even faster-paced work place kept her busy, kept her mind off the one thing that she seemed to always think about back home. Here, in a completely different state, she was able to re-invent herself, to pretend that she’d never loved at all.
That didn’t mean she dated, though. Every time a guy asked her out, she kindly said no. “I have to focus on my career right now,” she’d say, giving them a polite smile. It didn’t mean that she didn’t want to; god, she’d kill to go on another date, find a guy that was ten times better than Nathan could ever dream of being.
The problem was there was no one better than Nathan. Not for her.
She came home one Thursday, greeted her housekeeper, who pointed towards the answering machine. She saw the red light blinking on the cradle and walked over to it. She hadn’t been expecting any calls, but assumed it was from the office. So she pushed play. As soon as she heard his voice, soft and deep, her stomach flipped and her eyes filled with tears.
“It’s Nathan.” No greeting, no ‘Hey, Brooke.’ Just straight to the point. “Look, I know it’s been forever. What, five years now? I got your number from Haley, who got it from Karen. She figured it would be nice to get back into touch with you, make sure things were going okay,” he sighed, and she could almost see him running his fingers through his hair. “I can’t stop thinking about you. I found a picture of us the other day and, since then, you’re all I can think about. You’re all I dream about. Just do me a favor, okay? Give me a call sometime. I really nee- Yeah, I’ll be right there, Hales.”
She didn’t even know she was crying until she hit the hardwood floor, sobbing, and her hands went to cover her face. How could he do this to her? After five years and after ending things near the coat rack, he calls her and practically begs her to give him a second chance?
Brooke could feel too many emotions to comprehend. She wanted to call him, to tell him it was okay, he could still disappear and move in with her. They could still be happy together, hidden away from their past. That’s what he’d want, right? If he didn’t want that, then why would he call?
She could feel her carefully built walls crumbling, taking down her perfected lies with them. She’d been empty the past five years, pretending to be something she wasn’t; happy. And Nathan was the only person who could give her what she needed. But would he be willing to? Or would he just want to sleep with her again, to feel her legs wrapped around his waist?
The thought made her sick to her stomach. She raced into the bathroom, her hands gripping the edge of the porcelain bowl as she lost everything she’d eaten that day. Which, as usual, wasn’t much.
The sound of the buzzer filled Brooke’s apartment and she sat there for a moment, wishing the person away. When it didn’t stop and, instead, rang constantly through her home, she stood up with a scowl. She walked over to the intercom system and pressed the button. “What?”
“It’s me. Can I come up?”
She knew the voice. Even after all these years, she knew the voice. Without the message on her answering machine, she would’ve known that voice. And he knew she was home. She couldn’t be rude and tell him no, but she wasn’t too sure if she could let him come up. She pressed the button to unlock the door, and then walked back into the bathroom.
As she splashed cold water on her face, Brooke wondered what she was doing. By pressing that button, she hadn’t just let Nathan into her apartment building. She’d let him back into her life. Did she have some kind of masochistic death wish or something?
She was at the door by the second knock, ignoring the nervous butterflies in her stomach. Last time she felt those, things didn’t go over well.
“What do you want?” She had opened the door and was now staring into the face of the one man that held her heart. She had to be cold, be bitter. Otherwise, he’d know that she missed him; that she, too, wanted to be with him again. That she, over the past five years, had thought of no other men.
“Well, hello to you too, Brooke,” he smiled. It was half-hearted, timid; as if he were afraid she’d claw his eyes out. Which, at this point in time, was very tempting.
Brooke looked away from him, past him into the hallway. “What do you want, Nathan?” She hadn’t said his name in five years, but it didn’t sound foreign. It felt fresh, risky, and sexy.
He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, just like he always did. “I… I don’t know. I needed to see you. To make sure you were okay.”
She could’ve laughed at that, had she felt any ounce of happiness. “Well, you’ve seen me. I’m okay. Now leave,” she said, closing the door. His hand stopped her and she frowned, opening the door again and leaning against it. “What?”
“I shouldn’t have let you go, Brooke. I should’ve let Haley and been with you. I love you, more than you can even imagine.”
And there, on Brooke’s cheeks, were the tears that she thought she’d never cry for him again. “Don’t do this, Nathan. Don’t say things like this, make me think we stand a chance, and then leave again. Don’t say that you love me and then go running back to Haley.”
Nathan frowned somewhat. “I’m here to be with you. I’m done with Haley.”
“Does she know that? Or did you tell her you were coming here for a basketball conference or something?”
He shook his head somewhat. Haley was still at home, probably wondering where he’d gone. He figured he could just leave her and appear on Brooke’s doorstep, start life anew. Send Haley divorce papers, just like when she was on tour. Only they wouldn’t pretend the marriage didn’t happen.
“Does it matter, Brooke? I choose you. I want to be with you.”
And somewhere, beneath the broken heart and the bitterness, Brooke was able to see that it would never work. Eventually, he’d go crawling back to Haley. She didn’t doubt that Nathan loved her, but she knew that he loved Haley just that little bit more. And how could she live with someone, be with someone, who’s heart belonged to another person? She was greedy and wanted all of it, not just some of it. “No, Nathan. You’re just confused. Go back to Haley, okay? She’s the one you’re supposed to be with.”
It amazed her how easily those words left her mouth. She gently shut the door this time, locking it on the life she’d always wanted but would never have. She was desperate to be with Nathan, but she knew, just like she had five years ago, that his heart didn’t fully belong to her. She was just the replacement while Haley was deciding what to do. Just like, she imagined, now. She was the filler, the one that Nathan could fall back on.
She walked away from the door, ignoring the pounding from Nathan’s side, and walked into the bedroom. She kneeled down beside the bed and ran a hand gently over the brown curls on her daughter’s head.
It had been a hard five years, and she would’ve loved Nathan to know about and be involved in Sarah’s life, but this was for the best. Maybe someday she’d explain to Sarah why her father wasn’t in her life, but for now, all that mattered was that she had a devoted, loving mother who wouldn’t trade her for anything in the world.
The girl stirred somewhat, her blue eyes opening sleepily. “Mommy? You okay?”
Brooke nodded and leaned down, placing a kiss on the girl’s forehead. “Yeah, Sugarbear. Go back to sleep.”
Sarah nodded and rolled onto her side as Brooke glanced back towards the front room. She was alone, and for once, she didn’t feel empty or broken.
Fandom: One Tree Hill.
Characters: Brooke Davis/Nathan Scott, with an OC.
Prompt: 010 - Years.
Word Count: 1,467.
Rating: PG-13. Has a brief sex reference.
Summary: “Well, hello to you too, Brooke,” he smiled. It was half-hearted, timid; as if he were afraid she’d claw his eyes out. Which, at this point in time, was very tempting.
Author's Note: Sequel to When You Say You Love Me.
Table here.
She had moved to New York to get away from it all. Lucas and Peyton getting together had killed her, even though she said it was okay, and seeing the happily married Nathan and Haley… Well, that made her physically ill.
It had been five years, five long years since she set foot in Tree Hill. She wasn’t going back any time soon, either. New York had been good to her. The fast-paced city and even faster-paced work place kept her busy, kept her mind off the one thing that she seemed to always think about back home. Here, in a completely different state, she was able to re-invent herself, to pretend that she’d never loved at all.
That didn’t mean she dated, though. Every time a guy asked her out, she kindly said no. “I have to focus on my career right now,” she’d say, giving them a polite smile. It didn’t mean that she didn’t want to; god, she’d kill to go on another date, find a guy that was ten times better than Nathan could ever dream of being.
The problem was there was no one better than Nathan. Not for her.
She came home one Thursday, greeted her housekeeper, who pointed towards the answering machine. She saw the red light blinking on the cradle and walked over to it. She hadn’t been expecting any calls, but assumed it was from the office. So she pushed play. As soon as she heard his voice, soft and deep, her stomach flipped and her eyes filled with tears.
“It’s Nathan.” No greeting, no ‘Hey, Brooke.’ Just straight to the point. “Look, I know it’s been forever. What, five years now? I got your number from Haley, who got it from Karen. She figured it would be nice to get back into touch with you, make sure things were going okay,” he sighed, and she could almost see him running his fingers through his hair. “I can’t stop thinking about you. I found a picture of us the other day and, since then, you’re all I can think about. You’re all I dream about. Just do me a favor, okay? Give me a call sometime. I really nee- Yeah, I’ll be right there, Hales.”
She didn’t even know she was crying until she hit the hardwood floor, sobbing, and her hands went to cover her face. How could he do this to her? After five years and after ending things near the coat rack, he calls her and practically begs her to give him a second chance?
Brooke could feel too many emotions to comprehend. She wanted to call him, to tell him it was okay, he could still disappear and move in with her. They could still be happy together, hidden away from their past. That’s what he’d want, right? If he didn’t want that, then why would he call?
She could feel her carefully built walls crumbling, taking down her perfected lies with them. She’d been empty the past five years, pretending to be something she wasn’t; happy. And Nathan was the only person who could give her what she needed. But would he be willing to? Or would he just want to sleep with her again, to feel her legs wrapped around his waist?
The thought made her sick to her stomach. She raced into the bathroom, her hands gripping the edge of the porcelain bowl as she lost everything she’d eaten that day. Which, as usual, wasn’t much.
The sound of the buzzer filled Brooke’s apartment and she sat there for a moment, wishing the person away. When it didn’t stop and, instead, rang constantly through her home, she stood up with a scowl. She walked over to the intercom system and pressed the button. “What?”
“It’s me. Can I come up?”
She knew the voice. Even after all these years, she knew the voice. Without the message on her answering machine, she would’ve known that voice. And he knew she was home. She couldn’t be rude and tell him no, but she wasn’t too sure if she could let him come up. She pressed the button to unlock the door, and then walked back into the bathroom.
As she splashed cold water on her face, Brooke wondered what she was doing. By pressing that button, she hadn’t just let Nathan into her apartment building. She’d let him back into her life. Did she have some kind of masochistic death wish or something?
She was at the door by the second knock, ignoring the nervous butterflies in her stomach. Last time she felt those, things didn’t go over well.
“What do you want?” She had opened the door and was now staring into the face of the one man that held her heart. She had to be cold, be bitter. Otherwise, he’d know that she missed him; that she, too, wanted to be with him again. That she, over the past five years, had thought of no other men.
“Well, hello to you too, Brooke,” he smiled. It was half-hearted, timid; as if he were afraid she’d claw his eyes out. Which, at this point in time, was very tempting.
Brooke looked away from him, past him into the hallway. “What do you want, Nathan?” She hadn’t said his name in five years, but it didn’t sound foreign. It felt fresh, risky, and sexy.
He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, just like he always did. “I… I don’t know. I needed to see you. To make sure you were okay.”
She could’ve laughed at that, had she felt any ounce of happiness. “Well, you’ve seen me. I’m okay. Now leave,” she said, closing the door. His hand stopped her and she frowned, opening the door again and leaning against it. “What?”
“I shouldn’t have let you go, Brooke. I should’ve let Haley and been with you. I love you, more than you can even imagine.”
And there, on Brooke’s cheeks, were the tears that she thought she’d never cry for him again. “Don’t do this, Nathan. Don’t say things like this, make me think we stand a chance, and then leave again. Don’t say that you love me and then go running back to Haley.”
Nathan frowned somewhat. “I’m here to be with you. I’m done with Haley.”
“Does she know that? Or did you tell her you were coming here for a basketball conference or something?”
He shook his head somewhat. Haley was still at home, probably wondering where he’d gone. He figured he could just leave her and appear on Brooke’s doorstep, start life anew. Send Haley divorce papers, just like when she was on tour. Only they wouldn’t pretend the marriage didn’t happen.
“Does it matter, Brooke? I choose you. I want to be with you.”
And somewhere, beneath the broken heart and the bitterness, Brooke was able to see that it would never work. Eventually, he’d go crawling back to Haley. She didn’t doubt that Nathan loved her, but she knew that he loved Haley just that little bit more. And how could she live with someone, be with someone, who’s heart belonged to another person? She was greedy and wanted all of it, not just some of it. “No, Nathan. You’re just confused. Go back to Haley, okay? She’s the one you’re supposed to be with.”
It amazed her how easily those words left her mouth. She gently shut the door this time, locking it on the life she’d always wanted but would never have. She was desperate to be with Nathan, but she knew, just like she had five years ago, that his heart didn’t fully belong to her. She was just the replacement while Haley was deciding what to do. Just like, she imagined, now. She was the filler, the one that Nathan could fall back on.
She walked away from the door, ignoring the pounding from Nathan’s side, and walked into the bedroom. She kneeled down beside the bed and ran a hand gently over the brown curls on her daughter’s head.
It had been a hard five years, and she would’ve loved Nathan to know about and be involved in Sarah’s life, but this was for the best. Maybe someday she’d explain to Sarah why her father wasn’t in her life, but for now, all that mattered was that she had a devoted, loving mother who wouldn’t trade her for anything in the world.
The girl stirred somewhat, her blue eyes opening sleepily. “Mommy? You okay?”
Brooke nodded and leaned down, placing a kiss on the girl’s forehead. “Yeah, Sugarbear. Go back to sleep.”
Sarah nodded and rolled onto her side as Brooke glanced back towards the front room. She was alone, and for once, she didn’t feel empty or broken.