I take my last entry back. Im not going to tell anyone anything because i dont want them to deal with the frustration i am feeling. Why don't people learn? I just DO NOT understand ( Read more... )

i feel really disconnected from everyone. i feel like i cant tell anyone anything anymore because most of the time they really don't care. i've discovered this when trying to tell some of my friends things about my life. they don't listen or they just turn it back to themselves. i give people so much time to talk about their problems indepth and ( Read more... )

WHY IS EVERYONE SO FUCKING DUMB

sometimes when i get really depressed i wonder why i am alive. obviously i would never off myself so thats not what i mean. i think about why im living and if im really doing anything with my life. i know im to young yet to really do anything so im just trying to enjoy it. really what gives me comfort is what i would consider a "religious ( Read more... )

i had a bad day today.

as i stay at school more im beginning to feel my spirit come back full force. im regaining all the confidence i lost last year. its a nice feeling ( Read more... )

im really drunk so maybe i can write this and then understand it later. you're the only one who can see because i feel like you;re one of the only people i can trust with this. so sometimes i think i really was anorexic. sometimes when i look in the mirror i see this horrible disfigured being. isnt that sad? i mean i really know that i shouldnt. ah ( Read more... )

i always have the feeling that im not really living. so many times i keep waiting for life start but i feel like it cant for another year. why must everything fun be banned until we're 21? i feel like im clawing at the door waiting for excitement to show up. my life is going quickly but i still feel that im just passing time. i want to experience ( Read more... )

just so you know you are the only one who can read this. dont worry i do think about the things you said to me, i dont just brush them off. i give myself credit for one thing and thats always considering what people have to say. i think its funny that you have been thinking about our friendship recently because i have as well. the more i think ( Read more... )

i dont know what im looking to say in this entry. i really just want to talk about apperances, and by that i mean looks. how one looks determines so much. i find myself not giving people the time because they arent "up to my standards" but i think its mainly because i feel so judged. some of my most painful moments have dealt with my lack of beauty ( Read more... )