911 Operator: Hello, 911, what is your emergency?
FattyMcCraigs: Help! Motherfucker help me!
911 Operator: Please sir, calm down and tell me what your emergency is.
FattyMcCraigs: Calculus is trying to kill me!
911 Operator: What? What do you mean?
FattyMcCraigs: With numbers motherfucker! NUMBERS!
911 Operator: I'm sorry sir I don't think 911 can
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