Original Fiction
Title: Always...
Word Count: 382
Summary: On fear of loss and love...
I can feel your fingers on my skin, though you're not here with me. I can feel your body next to mine. Echoes and images, unreal imaginings. Your fingers mesh with mine, your thumb strokes the palm of my hand and I shiver, remembering, wishing.
It's cold, when you're not really here.
I'm smiling at the world, presenting a bright and cheerful visage. Inside I'm always wondering where you are, what you're doing, if you're wondering about me. I smile warm and friendly, inside, I'm cold, without you.
I can feel it on my face, the difference in my smiles. When I see you, the smile that stretches my lips is so much it makes my cheeks ache, making all the grins that came before seem pale imitations, merely a shape of my mouth, not an expression of something that threatens to burst out of me in a blaze of glory.
Wish I could hold you, wish I could have you. Wish you were mine for always. Wish I could lay claim to you like I want to, wish I thought you'd let me. Wish I didn't have to let you go free.
It's always scary. Will you come back? Will I see you again? Will you disappear when I'm not looking? A car could turn a corner too fast, a desperate man could rob you of your money and your life. A disease could strike, a toxin spread, a thousand and one ways I could lose you, and never have a chance to try to save you. Every time you walk away, I have to make myself not cling to you, try to keep you with me.
I don't want to miss a single second of time that I could be spending with you. When I lose you in the end, as I know I must some day, I know I'll begrudge every minute I could have spent with you and didn't get to. I know I'll shed an extra tear for every day we didn't share.
Want to curl beside you, around you, within you. Want to lie by your side and bury my face in your hair. Want to be with you, always, in whatever way I can be. Never want to let you go.
But I always will.
Word Count: 382
Summary: On fear of loss and love...
I can feel your fingers on my skin, though you're not here with me. I can feel your body next to mine. Echoes and images, unreal imaginings. Your fingers mesh with mine, your thumb strokes the palm of my hand and I shiver, remembering, wishing.
It's cold, when you're not really here.
I'm smiling at the world, presenting a bright and cheerful visage. Inside I'm always wondering where you are, what you're doing, if you're wondering about me. I smile warm and friendly, inside, I'm cold, without you.
I can feel it on my face, the difference in my smiles. When I see you, the smile that stretches my lips is so much it makes my cheeks ache, making all the grins that came before seem pale imitations, merely a shape of my mouth, not an expression of something that threatens to burst out of me in a blaze of glory.
Wish I could hold you, wish I could have you. Wish you were mine for always. Wish I could lay claim to you like I want to, wish I thought you'd let me. Wish I didn't have to let you go free.
It's always scary. Will you come back? Will I see you again? Will you disappear when I'm not looking? A car could turn a corner too fast, a desperate man could rob you of your money and your life. A disease could strike, a toxin spread, a thousand and one ways I could lose you, and never have a chance to try to save you. Every time you walk away, I have to make myself not cling to you, try to keep you with me.
I don't want to miss a single second of time that I could be spending with you. When I lose you in the end, as I know I must some day, I know I'll begrudge every minute I could have spent with you and didn't get to. I know I'll shed an extra tear for every day we didn't share.
Want to curl beside you, around you, within you. Want to lie by your side and bury my face in your hair. Want to be with you, always, in whatever way I can be. Never want to let you go.
But I always will.