(Untitled)

[febrezebeforska]

THIS IS A LETTER I EMAILED TO MY GRANDMA IN CALIFORNIA

Comments

[pink_eyes]

shes right. you have a dad. and you have a stepmom. she wont ever ever be your mom. because that spot is reserved for your mom. it always will be. but sometimes like in your case. that spot is empty. its your choice to let nicki fill it for you. if you dont want her to. then thats your choice. when was the last time you saw your mom? when was the last time you talked to her? do you honestly know what she looks like anymore. like i know youve seen pictures that are a few years old. but do you even know what she looks like? is she worth all the shit shes put you through? if you wanna talk to her about it. then write her a letter. telling her that you wanna talk. if shes doesnt write back then she doesnt write back. but i dont knwo what else to say because im not in your situation.
xoxoxo
lucy

[febrezebeforska]

yeah i understand what you mean, but i will always have an empty feeling. No i don't know what she looks like anymore, it has been over a year maybe even 2 years. she probably doesn't know what i look like anymore either. The problem is that I don't know where she lives, neither does my mother's side of the family, she is in and out of anywhere and everywhere. And if I see her, i won't know what to say, or how i feel. I feel guilty everytime I did see her, I always felt like a bad daughter and that everything was my fault. I just don't know what to do, or who to turn to for help except you truely, i dont talk to my rents about her, so i always feel like im botteling everything so it gets worse. I love her so much, but she doesn't show love back... it hurts

[pink_eyes]

go to the school cousoler. they will actually talk to you. and if u want it. there a psych that comes like every tuesday and u can talk to her too

[febrezebeforska]

i don't want to be one of "those" kids though