Comments | felinemuse: FIC: Slave To Design. (1/1?)

felinemuse

FIC: Slave To Design. (1/1?)

Mar 13, 2008 23:08

Title: Slave To Design. (1/1?)
Fandom: Real People / 30 Seconds To Mars.
Pairing: Jared/Tomo.
Word Count: 970.
Rating: R.
Warnings: slash, implied and alluded to BDSM activities, a hint of fluff. Kind of. Are these two even capable of fluff?
Summary: Admiration made him follow in his footsteps the first time. The path twisted a bit, but something ( Read more... )

Comments 4

erinbekkah March 14 2008, 04:26:20 UTC

great start...id love to read more=)

mlady_rebecca March 14 2008, 04:53:34 UTC

Oh, man, when the kinky muse hits, he hits. *g*

His wrists rarely hurt anymore and the ache in his lower back was almost pleasant now, like how it felt when hot water soothed tense muscles. The faint residual taste of rubber was no more annoying than morning breath and his tongue sleepily ran over bruised lips.

Love the imagery here.

Tomo always followed Jared's lead, after all.

Great last line. I like the circular mentions, beginning and end.

Sub!Tomo is quite intriguing. Nice to see him back safe and sound in the right Dom's hands. *g*

kit84 March 16 2008, 23:38:33 UTC

I tried to quote lines that I liked especially. I failed and ended up quoting the whole fic here... *has taken it out now*

Copying (copykit?!) mlady_rebecca, I loved the imagery in...too many lines to mention. I loved the almost understated you tell us that Tomo had been with Jared (or maybe I'm sleep deprived and slow, because I had to re-read just to make 100% sure I'd read what I thought I did, lol) - but yes, understated, but it's just as powerful.

Fucked into unconsciousness like a whore, someone had put it once. He didn't care what they called it as long as they didn't stop.

^^ I'm so in love with that line.

Neither of them spoke, they just stared. But when a thumb brushed across his lips he parted them and when lips pressed to his own he let himself lean up into the kiss.And this bit ^^ was fucking vivid in my head. Alongside the mentions of...at least the darker side of sex - Jared was positively claiming Tomo to my mind. Not many writer's can bring that clear a mental picture, with so few words, for me. I'm guessing that was the ( ... )

jynnxx April 4 2008, 20:45:08 UTC

Can't believe I'm only now commenting *smacks self*
This is, unbelievably hot, I'm in love with the way Tomo reacts and it's so very well done that you kinda know what's happening even without it being explicit and just wow at that.
Kinda feel sorry for Shannon *pets his confused head*