Oil And Vinegar - for brigits_flame

[fenrischained]

Title: Oil & Vinegar
Genre: Romantic
Warnings: No.

Summary: Some people just clash. I always believed that.

A/N: This was written (hurriedly) for the Week 2 prompt at brigits_flame- 'Oil And Vinegar'. Yes, I'm just that unimaginative.
Anyway. Last-ditch attempt. Enjoy!

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Comments

[pipisafoat]

Very interesting! It makes me wonder - oil and vinegar tend to separate after too long together, so does this relationship work out longterm? Very well-written, too, very down-to-earth and such.

Anyway, I'm Pip, your other editor! As far as content goes, this is extremely good. The only real thing I would suggest is when you're talking about the guy, you say "You dress in suits and ties when it’s appropriate." This isn't so much an 'oil' line to me as a line that says "He understands generic social conventions." If you change the "when it's appropriate" to something more along the lines of "almost every day", then we're getting oily. I love the reference to the Armani aftershave, though. It really brings it all together. I also enjoyed the mental image of him sitting in a movie theater, wearing Prada. So, enough content, because that's all I can come up with for you - on to the specific line edits! Everything is a suggestion, feel free to question me on my choices or just ignore me completely - I won't be at all offended.

• My mother