Not the Man

[festusmonroe]

I get the impression that whomever had my current phone number before I did was pretty shady. I have gotten a disproportionate number of prerecorded calls wishing to discuss "important legal matters." Several anonymous callers address me as "Guererro" before I tell them I'm not who they're looking for. Their tone of voice quickly becomes much

Comments

[stilled_life]

My money's on bounced checks. The battle is on, homeskillet.

Re:

[festusmonroe]

Oh, I hadn't thought of that! That sounds plausible.

P.S. Leave poor Pete Townshend alone!

[stilled_life]

P.S. Leave poor Pete Townshend alone!

I guarantee nothing. However, on a much cheerier note, I never wished you a happy birthday, because I am a big fat bastard. So... Happy Birthday! Here's to yet another year of somehow avoiding death and the decay that inevitably follows. Cheers!

Re:

[festusmonroe]

Thank you! This year actually has felt like I've been cheating death, or at least various catastrophies. Life up, decay down. Cheers, indeed.

[lisalicious]

That might be the greatest pic ever.

And I'm voting on bounced checks, too.

[festusmonroe]

Why thank you.

How's everybody know so much about bounced checks?

[brieweeherman]

isn't your new userpic the same one as on the spacebar website?
i like it a lot.

Bill the Shill says . . .

[festusmonroe]

isn't your new userpic the same one as on the spacebar website?

Oh, you mean www.spacebarmusic.com? Why yes! It has lots of other cool pictures too, plus mp3's, news, and viewing it increases one's appeal to the opposite sex. Check it out today!

Sorry. What I meant to say was, thanks, I like the picture, too.

[akhliber]

i just want to know why you haven't taken the name Guererro to be your own yet.
i mean, it's pretty damn sexy, if you ask me.

[festusmonroe]

It does have a nice ring to it. I'm a little concerned, though, that if I start answering to Guererro on the phone, the wrong person is gonna think I'm the OTHER Guererro and show up at my doorstep with grudge and a pistol. In normal conversation, however, I could dig the name.

By the by, I hope you're having a happy birthday. Or at least a somewhat healthy one.

[swallowwhole]

ooh, i'm with chris! i mean, "bill" is okay, and "anti-bill" is frickin' awesome, but Guererro has a certain spice like few other names.

and that is a cool pitcha.

[festusmonroe]

What do you mean Bill is "okay?" I mean, it's nothing as eloquent as Reginald or anything, but I think it fits me just fine, thankyouverymuch.

Man, all these names to keep track of! This makes 6, I believe. A few more and I can start my own baseball team consisting only of myself.

[festusmonroe]

Though as I've said before, as long as you're not addressing me as "Asshole," I'll probably answer to any old name.

Guererro . . . not bad. Makes me sound like some swarthy bandito. Or a luchador.