You're not Gay - Part 5
Title: You're Not Gay
Author: fiar22
Rating: pg-13
Genre: angst, romance, ?denial?, humor
Summary: If you asked Lee Taemin if he was gay, he'd probably just stare at you. He would rather die that unveil the secret that changed his whole life. However, if you asked Kim Jonghyun the same question, you'd probably wake up in his bed the next morning (regardless of gender). Two very different lifestyles that eventually collide.
Author's notes: Guys, I wrote another part. YAY. Honestly, this is ten times easier to write then "Candles", but I've been busy trying to write some NielxTaemin in celebration of Teen Top's comeback. Anyway, I sort of just winged this one. I think it's mostly good, but I didn't read over it. I'll do it tomorrow or some time later. ENJOY~
Just like any other morning in this new town, Taemin felt light from the sun protruding into his room from the window and clawing at the back of his eye lids. He buried his head in his feather-filled pillow and brought his feather-filled comforter to cover his head, shielding it from the threatening beams of light. His bed had never felt so comfy and he really didn't want to get up ever. No, but his bed really never had been this comfy, and since when did all of his things smell of this musky colonge?
It was at that moment that Taemin's eyes shot open.
Exactly where was he? What had happened last night? Then, all in one go, everything came flooding back to him: Krystal, the party, the rooftop. He spent hours sitting and drinking with a stranger, whom he let carry him off to god-knows-where and thus he woke up in an unfamiliar bed. Plus, what exactly had Krystal thought when she didn't see him again? Did she text him? Did she call? Did his mother or brother know where he was? This was all becoming very complicated and Taemin wished more and more that he had never sat under those bleachers with Minho because none of this would be happening to him otherwise.
"Mr. Taemin?" he suddenly heard a mousy voice call to him.
He shot up and looked toward the door that seemed so unreasonably far away, even for such a big room. It took a minute to register that he was 'Mr. Taemin', "Y-yes?"
The girl opened the door wider and revealed she was holding a large breakfast tray filled with things that Taemin had only dreamed of being served in the morning. She put on a large smile and she made her way over. "Mr. Jonghyun requested I treat you with the same hospitality that I treat his family, so I've come with your breakfast. Please, do enjoy, and make sure to ring if you need anything."
Taemin wasn't really sure what anything meant right now, so he just said, "Okay."
When she left, he was stuck staring at a tray full of waffles, sausages, eggs, fruit and a heaping bowl of rice. He wasn't sure how she knew, but he was extremely pleased to see the rice. Honestly, he may not have been sure what exactly was going on, but he never left food offered to him untouched. That would be rude.
~
It wasn't Key's place to say, but he thought after everything that had happened Jinki wouldn't be so dense. On the other hand, the shocked look on his face was telling him otherwise.
"So, you're saying that we definitely slept together last night, right?" Jinki managed to sputter out.
Key rolled his eyes and nodded his head, "I won't be able to walk properly for about a week."
"And you're absolutely sure that you're a boy," Jinki seem to pick each word carefully.
Key sighed, but then put on an award winning smile, "I'm whatever you want me to be, honey."
And Jinki was left with his mouth agape yet again.
~
Taemin had never felt so stuffed in his entire life. Honestly, he hadn't even touched his bacon and he felt so bad about it. Who wasted bacon? Though, as his stomach stretched and skewed he felt his bladder become pressured and full. He slid out from under the giant tray of food and scampered across the room to the door way that seemed most likely to be out. In turn, he was met with a giant hallway full of doors upon doors.
Honestly, who needed so many rooms? But the bathroom had to be one of them, so Taemin started his trek down the hallway, opening different doors and peeking inside to try and find a toilet. Though, after about six different failures, he felt like there was no way the next attempt wouldn't be a success.
He reached for the door handle with a bit of eagerness, but was instead greeted with the door opening before he could do it himself. Then, he saw Jinki.
"What?" was all Taemin could say.
"Taemin?" Jinki asked looking more thoroughly confused than he previously had. "Why are you here? Did you get raped too?"
"Raped," it wasn't really a question, but more of Taemin's mouth forming the word to better understand whatever the fuck was going on on this crazy morning. "Honestly, what the fuck is going on?"
"I just told you," Jinki said like his little brother was the stupidest person he'd ever met, "I got raped."
Taemin's brow furrowed, "Whatever, I have to pee." He pushed Jinki aside and closed the door behind him.
Jinki was obviously just being an asshole. Who would rape Jinki of all people?
~
Jonghyun wasn't sure which smell he loved more: alcohol seeping through people's pores or carpet cleaner the day after one of his big parties. He was sure he preferred one over the other, but he always changed his mind depending the moment he was in. Either way, he enjoyed both and that would probably never change.
He thought about this has he waltzed up the stairs and back towards his bedroom. After all, he was sure that cute little red-head was definitely awake by now and he didn't like to keep his guests waiting.
Actually, it had been more of a surprise than anything when he woke up next to Taemin. He couldn't remember for the life of him what happened, but by the amount of clothing both were wearing he assumed nothing sexual had happened. It wasn't like him to put on clothes after doing the dirty, and really, he didn't usually sleep in clothing anyway, so that must have meant he was too drunk to function normally. Plus, he vaguely remembered carrying the little red-head up to his room thinking he was Key or something.
Anyway, none of that was important right now. What was important was that he needed to get back to his room and see if Taemin was awake. He imagined the guy would be pretty freaked out when he woke up in a strange bed with no one around. However, he was surprised for the second time this morning because the Taemin was no where to be seen and there was a massacred breakfast tray laying upon his bed.
Obviously, Jonghyun was too late.
~
When Taemin was finished going to the bathroom he decided that he was actually feeling a bit exhilarated. After all, it wasn't every day you woke up in a mansion and got to eat tons of food (though, he could have gone without Jinki being there.)
However, in mid-stride down the hallway he realized he had no idea where he came from. He took a glance down one way and saw rows of doors. He took a glance down the other way and saw the same thing. What a predicament.
His first thought was to panic, but realizing that probably wouldn't do anything but ruin his mood he decided that another option would have to do. This option really wasn't that much different, though.
"HELP," he yelled at the top of his lungs. He almost started flailing his arms as if on a deserted island, but froze when a door opened and a head peeked out. It took him a minute to recognize exactly who it was, but Key was unmistakable for anyone else.
"Why are you yelling?" Key asked. He didn't look annoyed per-say, just... extremely skeptical.
"Uhh," Taemin let the feeling of stupidity sink deep into his bones, "where is Jonghyun's room?"
Key pursued his lips, but didn't hesitate, "It's about thirty-two paces that way," he said pointing toward the opposite direction that Taemin was facing.
In this situation, Taemin didn't have the balls to ask exactly why Key new the measured amount of paces to Jonghyun's room or why they were the direction he chose to give him. So, instead he said, "T-thanks," and turned around to head thirty-two paces toward Jonghyun's room.
When he got there he hoped that the room would still be empty. He took a deep breath and pushed open the door.
"I was wondering when you'd come back," Jonghyun cooed.
Taemin stood awkwardly at the entrance, "Hey."
Jonghyun smiled at him, "I see you enjoyed your breakfast."
Taemin reached his hand up to twirl his hair, only to realize his hair was short now and so he scratched under his ear to keep from looking completely awkward, "I guess so."
Then, everything was quiet and Taemin was sure with the way he couldn't help but stand stupidly and his lack of words probably made this Jonghyun think he was a total loser and there went his chance of ever been normal at this town. Not to mention, he probably knew about Krystal and that he was gay and his life was mostly over.
It hadn't even crossed his mind that this was the same guy he'd sat around drinking with for hours, and he probably wasn't going to judge him like that.
"So, last night was pretty crazy," Jonghyun initiated because he honestly didn't remember that much after dancing with Jessica.
Taemin shifted from one foot to the other, "Yeah, if you count sitting on a roof and drinking with one person for four hours crazy." Taemin was trying to play it cool. Maybe, just maybe, he could pretend nothing big had happened.
Jonghyun made a face, "but before that."
Taemin felt himself freeze and slightly start to panic. His life was over. "God, I'm really pathetic, aren't I?"
This was starting to become very interesting for Jonghyun. What had happened? "You're not pathetic," he said getting up from his spot on the bed, "It's not even that big of a deal."
"He knows, fuck, he knows," were the thoughts of Taemin at that very moment. "I'm pretty sure it is a big deal when a girl is throwing herself at you and you can't even be polite enough to get it hard," Taemin huffed and folded his arms.
"Wait," Jonghyun took a minute to process this, "I couldn't get it hard?" he said this in a bizarre tone as he glanced down at himself and then back up to Taemin.
"You," Taemin paused and looked at the older boy like he was stupid. "No, not you, you idiot. ME! I couldn't get it hard. Are we even on the same page here?"
"Actually, I don't remember anything from last night besides dancing with Jessica and carrying you up here," Jonghyun admitted.
Taemin just stared at him for a minute. Really, it felt like ten minutes. Then, Taemin swiveled around Jonghyun and headed for the spot where his shoes lay next to the bed. However, he was cut off.
"Wait, wait, wait. You really couldn't get it hard? Are you serious? Wait, aren't you Krystal's... Oh my god," Jonghyun realized more and more with each passing word.
Taemin had mixture of things playing on his face. Mostly, he looked pissed, but if you looked a little deeper you'd realize it was more of hurt kind of feeling. That was obvious by the tears that suddenly threatened to spill over the edge of his face. "Get the fuck out of my way," he spat, though he didn't really sound menacing at all.
"Hey, kid, slow down. Did that really happen?" Jonghyun seemed genuinely curious.
"What do you think?"
This time, it was Jonghyun's turn to shift awkwardly, "Dude, why not?"
There was more silence and then Taemin sighed deeply, "Do you really want to know?"
"Kinda."
Taemin huffed again and then closed his eyes, "I'm gay."
There was no response. Taemin felt anxiety eating away at him, so he opened his eyes.
Jonghyun's face was completely blank. It wasn't something Taemin could read and that really worried him more than immediate rejection.
"So, you're completely gay. Like, no girls at all?" was the response he eventually got.
Taemin wiggled his shoulders a little and looked at the ground, "Well, that was the first time I've tried to be with a girl and I've only ever kissed one boy, but I'm pretty sure I would know if I was--"
Taemin didn't really know what to think of this. He'd only felt this sensation once before in his life and everything changed after that. So, no matter how magnificent it felt, he immediately pushed Jonghyun off of his lips. "What the hell was that?" he yelled, but it sort of squeaked near the end.
"So, you're definitely gay then?"
"Y-yeah, of course I'm still gay. People don't just change over one stupid kiss," even as he said this he knew this seemed completely hypocritical to his entire situation.
A grin spread across Jonghyun's face that seemed dashing and worrisome all at the same time, but there was nothing Taemin could do about any of it. "Get your shoes on. I'll take you home."
Author: fiar22
Rating: pg-13
Genre: angst, romance, ?denial?, humor
Summary: If you asked Lee Taemin if he was gay, he'd probably just stare at you. He would rather die that unveil the secret that changed his whole life. However, if you asked Kim Jonghyun the same question, you'd probably wake up in his bed the next morning (regardless of gender). Two very different lifestyles that eventually collide.
Author's notes: Guys, I wrote another part. YAY. Honestly, this is ten times easier to write then "Candles", but I've been busy trying to write some NielxTaemin in celebration of Teen Top's comeback. Anyway, I sort of just winged this one. I think it's mostly good, but I didn't read over it. I'll do it tomorrow or some time later. ENJOY~
Just like any other morning in this new town, Taemin felt light from the sun protruding into his room from the window and clawing at the back of his eye lids. He buried his head in his feather-filled pillow and brought his feather-filled comforter to cover his head, shielding it from the threatening beams of light. His bed had never felt so comfy and he really didn't want to get up ever. No, but his bed really never had been this comfy, and since when did all of his things smell of this musky colonge?
It was at that moment that Taemin's eyes shot open.
Exactly where was he? What had happened last night? Then, all in one go, everything came flooding back to him: Krystal, the party, the rooftop. He spent hours sitting and drinking with a stranger, whom he let carry him off to god-knows-where and thus he woke up in an unfamiliar bed. Plus, what exactly had Krystal thought when she didn't see him again? Did she text him? Did she call? Did his mother or brother know where he was? This was all becoming very complicated and Taemin wished more and more that he had never sat under those bleachers with Minho because none of this would be happening to him otherwise.
"Mr. Taemin?" he suddenly heard a mousy voice call to him.
He shot up and looked toward the door that seemed so unreasonably far away, even for such a big room. It took a minute to register that he was 'Mr. Taemin', "Y-yes?"
The girl opened the door wider and revealed she was holding a large breakfast tray filled with things that Taemin had only dreamed of being served in the morning. She put on a large smile and she made her way over. "Mr. Jonghyun requested I treat you with the same hospitality that I treat his family, so I've come with your breakfast. Please, do enjoy, and make sure to ring if you need anything."
Taemin wasn't really sure what anything meant right now, so he just said, "Okay."
When she left, he was stuck staring at a tray full of waffles, sausages, eggs, fruit and a heaping bowl of rice. He wasn't sure how she knew, but he was extremely pleased to see the rice. Honestly, he may not have been sure what exactly was going on, but he never left food offered to him untouched. That would be rude.
~
It wasn't Key's place to say, but he thought after everything that had happened Jinki wouldn't be so dense. On the other hand, the shocked look on his face was telling him otherwise.
"So, you're saying that we definitely slept together last night, right?" Jinki managed to sputter out.
Key rolled his eyes and nodded his head, "I won't be able to walk properly for about a week."
"And you're absolutely sure that you're a boy," Jinki seem to pick each word carefully.
Key sighed, but then put on an award winning smile, "I'm whatever you want me to be, honey."
And Jinki was left with his mouth agape yet again.
~
Taemin had never felt so stuffed in his entire life. Honestly, he hadn't even touched his bacon and he felt so bad about it. Who wasted bacon? Though, as his stomach stretched and skewed he felt his bladder become pressured and full. He slid out from under the giant tray of food and scampered across the room to the door way that seemed most likely to be out. In turn, he was met with a giant hallway full of doors upon doors.
Honestly, who needed so many rooms? But the bathroom had to be one of them, so Taemin started his trek down the hallway, opening different doors and peeking inside to try and find a toilet. Though, after about six different failures, he felt like there was no way the next attempt wouldn't be a success.
He reached for the door handle with a bit of eagerness, but was instead greeted with the door opening before he could do it himself. Then, he saw Jinki.
"What?" was all Taemin could say.
"Taemin?" Jinki asked looking more thoroughly confused than he previously had. "Why are you here? Did you get raped too?"
"Raped," it wasn't really a question, but more of Taemin's mouth forming the word to better understand whatever the fuck was going on on this crazy morning. "Honestly, what the fuck is going on?"
"I just told you," Jinki said like his little brother was the stupidest person he'd ever met, "I got raped."
Taemin's brow furrowed, "Whatever, I have to pee." He pushed Jinki aside and closed the door behind him.
Jinki was obviously just being an asshole. Who would rape Jinki of all people?
~
Jonghyun wasn't sure which smell he loved more: alcohol seeping through people's pores or carpet cleaner the day after one of his big parties. He was sure he preferred one over the other, but he always changed his mind depending the moment he was in. Either way, he enjoyed both and that would probably never change.
He thought about this has he waltzed up the stairs and back towards his bedroom. After all, he was sure that cute little red-head was definitely awake by now and he didn't like to keep his guests waiting.
Actually, it had been more of a surprise than anything when he woke up next to Taemin. He couldn't remember for the life of him what happened, but by the amount of clothing both were wearing he assumed nothing sexual had happened. It wasn't like him to put on clothes after doing the dirty, and really, he didn't usually sleep in clothing anyway, so that must have meant he was too drunk to function normally. Plus, he vaguely remembered carrying the little red-head up to his room thinking he was Key or something.
Anyway, none of that was important right now. What was important was that he needed to get back to his room and see if Taemin was awake. He imagined the guy would be pretty freaked out when he woke up in a strange bed with no one around. However, he was surprised for the second time this morning because the Taemin was no where to be seen and there was a massacred breakfast tray laying upon his bed.
Obviously, Jonghyun was too late.
~
When Taemin was finished going to the bathroom he decided that he was actually feeling a bit exhilarated. After all, it wasn't every day you woke up in a mansion and got to eat tons of food (though, he could have gone without Jinki being there.)
However, in mid-stride down the hallway he realized he had no idea where he came from. He took a glance down one way and saw rows of doors. He took a glance down the other way and saw the same thing. What a predicament.
His first thought was to panic, but realizing that probably wouldn't do anything but ruin his mood he decided that another option would have to do. This option really wasn't that much different, though.
"HELP," he yelled at the top of his lungs. He almost started flailing his arms as if on a deserted island, but froze when a door opened and a head peeked out. It took him a minute to recognize exactly who it was, but Key was unmistakable for anyone else.
"Why are you yelling?" Key asked. He didn't look annoyed per-say, just... extremely skeptical.
"Uhh," Taemin let the feeling of stupidity sink deep into his bones, "where is Jonghyun's room?"
Key pursued his lips, but didn't hesitate, "It's about thirty-two paces that way," he said pointing toward the opposite direction that Taemin was facing.
In this situation, Taemin didn't have the balls to ask exactly why Key new the measured amount of paces to Jonghyun's room or why they were the direction he chose to give him. So, instead he said, "T-thanks," and turned around to head thirty-two paces toward Jonghyun's room.
When he got there he hoped that the room would still be empty. He took a deep breath and pushed open the door.
"I was wondering when you'd come back," Jonghyun cooed.
Taemin stood awkwardly at the entrance, "Hey."
Jonghyun smiled at him, "I see you enjoyed your breakfast."
Taemin reached his hand up to twirl his hair, only to realize his hair was short now and so he scratched under his ear to keep from looking completely awkward, "I guess so."
Then, everything was quiet and Taemin was sure with the way he couldn't help but stand stupidly and his lack of words probably made this Jonghyun think he was a total loser and there went his chance of ever been normal at this town. Not to mention, he probably knew about Krystal and that he was gay and his life was mostly over.
It hadn't even crossed his mind that this was the same guy he'd sat around drinking with for hours, and he probably wasn't going to judge him like that.
"So, last night was pretty crazy," Jonghyun initiated because he honestly didn't remember that much after dancing with Jessica.
Taemin shifted from one foot to the other, "Yeah, if you count sitting on a roof and drinking with one person for four hours crazy." Taemin was trying to play it cool. Maybe, just maybe, he could pretend nothing big had happened.
Jonghyun made a face, "but before that."
Taemin felt himself freeze and slightly start to panic. His life was over. "God, I'm really pathetic, aren't I?"
This was starting to become very interesting for Jonghyun. What had happened? "You're not pathetic," he said getting up from his spot on the bed, "It's not even that big of a deal."
"He knows, fuck, he knows," were the thoughts of Taemin at that very moment. "I'm pretty sure it is a big deal when a girl is throwing herself at you and you can't even be polite enough to get it hard," Taemin huffed and folded his arms.
"Wait," Jonghyun took a minute to process this, "I couldn't get it hard?" he said this in a bizarre tone as he glanced down at himself and then back up to Taemin.
"You," Taemin paused and looked at the older boy like he was stupid. "No, not you, you idiot. ME! I couldn't get it hard. Are we even on the same page here?"
"Actually, I don't remember anything from last night besides dancing with Jessica and carrying you up here," Jonghyun admitted.
Taemin just stared at him for a minute. Really, it felt like ten minutes. Then, Taemin swiveled around Jonghyun and headed for the spot where his shoes lay next to the bed. However, he was cut off.
"Wait, wait, wait. You really couldn't get it hard? Are you serious? Wait, aren't you Krystal's... Oh my god," Jonghyun realized more and more with each passing word.
Taemin had mixture of things playing on his face. Mostly, he looked pissed, but if you looked a little deeper you'd realize it was more of hurt kind of feeling. That was obvious by the tears that suddenly threatened to spill over the edge of his face. "Get the fuck out of my way," he spat, though he didn't really sound menacing at all.
"Hey, kid, slow down. Did that really happen?" Jonghyun seemed genuinely curious.
"What do you think?"
This time, it was Jonghyun's turn to shift awkwardly, "Dude, why not?"
There was more silence and then Taemin sighed deeply, "Do you really want to know?"
"Kinda."
Taemin huffed again and then closed his eyes, "I'm gay."
There was no response. Taemin felt anxiety eating away at him, so he opened his eyes.
Jonghyun's face was completely blank. It wasn't something Taemin could read and that really worried him more than immediate rejection.
"So, you're completely gay. Like, no girls at all?" was the response he eventually got.
Taemin wiggled his shoulders a little and looked at the ground, "Well, that was the first time I've tried to be with a girl and I've only ever kissed one boy, but I'm pretty sure I would know if I was--"
Taemin didn't really know what to think of this. He'd only felt this sensation once before in his life and everything changed after that. So, no matter how magnificent it felt, he immediately pushed Jonghyun off of his lips. "What the hell was that?" he yelled, but it sort of squeaked near the end.
"So, you're definitely gay then?"
"Y-yeah, of course I'm still gay. People don't just change over one stupid kiss," even as he said this he knew this seemed completely hypocritical to his entire situation.
A grin spread across Jonghyun's face that seemed dashing and worrisome all at the same time, but there was nothing Taemin could do about any of it. "Get your shoes on. I'll take you home."