Candles - Part 9 [Final]
Title: Candles
Author: fiar22
Rating: pg-13
Genre: ANGST, romance, some smut
Warning: language is strong in this chapter. Also, implied sex.
Summary: Kim Kibum and Kim Jonghyun had the perfect relationship, right? They had everything, right? WRONG. But Key finds out the hard way and has to work towards getting over it so that he move forward and maybe find someone new. (summary sucks cause this started out as a one-shot XD)
Author's note: GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUYS omg. This is the last chapter. OMG. Although, I plan to make an epilogue, but still.... GUUUUUUUUUUUYS this is the first SHINee fic I've finished. omg. this is all so exciting. someone like this. Please? :P Anyway, enjoy.
OH BUT WAIT. I forgot. This chapter was heavily influenced by this and it actually happens to be the song that plays when Key does the deal with the CD. So, keep that in mind.
After a full week of Dawson's Creek, Key was finally watching Joey leave Dawson for what he wished was the last time and make her way to Pacey's boat. He knew it sounded stupid, but he was comparing this to his own situation. Jonghyun wanted him back, but it was no longer Jonghyun that Key wanted. He wanted Onew. What if Pacey decided he didn't want Joey? What if she didn't make it to the boat and he really didn't care to look back? What if Onew didn't want him?
Key probably could have cried, but he didn't see how much good it would do. Besides, Taemin already did enough crying for the both of them during the week he stayed at Key's house. Honestly, Key was surprised Taemin's parents' weren't more concerned, but he assumed that they understood because of the second-hand story he heard about Minho trying to break into Taemin's house. Sadly for Minho, Taemin hadn't been there since he'd broken up with him.
The initial thoughts in Key's head had been to worry drastically over Minho, and when he heard that story it became the case ten-folds. He did the only natural thing and excused himself to the bathroom and tried to call Minho to see if he was even alive. Unluckily, Minho didn't answer. Or should he say luckily? Because instead of Minho, it was Onew. At first, Key hadn't known what to say.
"Oh. Hey."
"If you're calling to see if he's okay, the answer is no. He's a complete mess, but I've got him."
"So, you know?"
"Yeah. Taemin at your house?"
"Yeah, has been for a couple days now."
Silence.
"Hey, Key?"
"Yeah?"
"When this is all blown over, we should talk."
"Yeah, okay." and then the conversation was over.
Really, it hadn't been much, but it'd been all Key could think about even with Taemin sobbing all over the place.
"It looks like we're going to have to go to my house and get that fourth season," Taemin sniffled.
Key sighed, "We are not going anywhere. You should try to take a nap or drink some water. I will go and get the dvd from your house."
Taemin seemed to want to protest, but he didn't really have the motivation to do so, "Okay."
Key pushed himself up, absent-mindedly grabbing his keys, his phone, and Onew's phone. The whole week he'd been carrying it around not really sure what to do with it and Onew hadn't mentioned it on the phone, so he decided he better keep it as dear to him as his own phone. It had been wedged between the middle of Key's SUV's back seat and was not hard to find. Key had wondered if Onew had purposely left it there.
When he was finally at Taemin's house it wasn't too hard to get in. After all, he knew where the spare key was and Taemin's dog's were nothing to be scared of. He took a minute to pet the two of them.
"Hey, Adam. Hey, Eve. How are you guys? Are you lonely? Taeminnie will be back soon, I promise," he cooed as he put his fingers through their fur. They licked at his hands and panted at him expectantly.
He got up and made his way to Taemin's room. The room looked a bit like Taemin had been kidnapped in mid-action. There was a shirt on the floor and the chair to his desk was scooted out as if he'd just went to the other room and would be right back. Plus, the bed wasn't made and that seemed a little bit unusual for Taemin.
Key sighed and made his way over to the shelf that held tons of cases for CDs and DVDs. He slowly skimmed through them with his finger, looking for anything that had a big "D" on it. Just when he thought he should give up, he found it and smiled, feeling accomplished.
However, he didn't get up just yet. Something seemed to be keeping him there and he kept looking at the shelf. He felt himself grab toward it and pull something out, a blank CD case with a home-made CD in it. It read Our Love on the front, written and decorated by Taemin.
Key wasn't really one to snoop, but he wanted to listen to this CD. So, he made his way over to Taemin's CD player and put it in.
Then, Eve let out a whine that caught Key's attention.
Key smiled down at her, "What number do you think I should try?"
She pawed at his leg twice.
"Two? I was thinking four," he frowned, but then a light-bulb went off in his head. "How about we add them together? We'll listen to six," and so he turned the player to number six and hit play.
He sat himself on Taemin's unmade bed and prepared himself, but he really wasn't ready for what he heard. This song, it held memories for him. "Pretty recent memories," he thought to himself.
Suddenly, he was back to that night at the party with Onew. This song had played there right before Onew and him had decided to take it upstairs. They had been slow dancing extremely close, hands all over each other, practically groping each other for the world to see. Another thing he remembered was seeing Minho looking particularly lonely with a heartbreaking smile out of the corner of his eye. What had this song meant for them?
He picked up the empty CD case and took out the booklook in the front. He flipped to the page that explained number six and before he could finish reading he stuffed it back into the case. He looked over to the dogs, "Seems like this song was made for everyone's first time, huh?" He shook the image out of his head and pushed stop on the CD player.
He picked up the DVD he came for and then walked out the door. Taemin's house suddenly felt very dreary and he could almost feel the memories it was filled with. It almost reminded him of when he and Jonghyn had broken up. It was pretty evident why Taemin couldn't stand to be there.
Key took the drive home pretty glumly. He didn't turn on the radio or anything, just sat in silence. Though, it honestly could have been worse and Onew had said he wanted to talk to him, so maybe things wouldn't be so bad for him. But it was Taemin he was worried about.
He was in mid thought when he arrived at his house to see a scene he didn't exactly expect.
Onew was standing, looking horrified, behind a beligerent Minho who was screaming at Taemin, the younger man holding tight to one of Key's stuffed animals and sobbing. Before Key got out of the car he made note that Minho looked like he hadn't eaten, slept, or done much of anything in the last week. His eyes were red and puffy as if he hadn't stopped crying, but at the same time they were wide and angry.
Key tried to make no sense of Minho's yelling as he approached the scene. "What the hell is going on?" he asked Onew.
"He got out. He's drunk and stronger than me," Onew said, looking wearily at Minho who seemed to have just noticed Key's arrival.
"Good, fucking, gosh. Thank you, god because good ol' Kibummie Kibum is here now. I was thinking you would miss this," Minho slurred.
"Minho, what are you doing?"
"You know, this doesn't concern you, blondie. I'm here to expose the truth about my SLUT of an ex-boyfriend," he spat with a furiousity not seen before.
"What the fuck are you-"
"Shut it, blondie. Taeminnie here has tons of secrets," Minho cooed.
Taemin was looking more and more fragile by the second. He wasn't even trying to keep his tears from flowing and he was looking at the ground.
"Obviously, I'm nothing much. Just faithful ol'Minho for nothing but sex and good times. I dance with people to make others jealous and get to watch everyone else live their party lives," he threw his hands up for emphasis. "However, I would like to say I do have one thing and that is Taemin, or did have him so I thought. See, I was a good boyfriend and I went around with him wherever he would go and wanted nothing but to make him happy. I was good to you, right Taeminnie?" he looked almost pleadingly at Taemin who he had just been yelling at and Taemin couldn't find it in himself to answer.
"Minho," Onew started gently, but the younger boy was having none of it.
"Shut up," Minho spat and looked back at Taemin. "Well, obviously not good enough, huh? You needed something extra on the side, didn't ya?"
Key crossed his arms, "What the fuck are you talking about, Minho?"
Taemin continued to sob quietly.
"I'm talking about your ex fucking my ex. Though it may not be a thing to you, he was still my boyfriend until a week ago when he broke my fucking heart and stomped it to pieces before I found out this lovely piece of information."
Key just stood there.
"See? Nothing to really say. You look a little but disgruntled Key. Was he fucking you too? Maybe Onew? Or maybe he was-" but Minho didn't get to finish his rant.
"STOP. JUST SHUT UP," Taemin finally spoke up and it rattled everyone.
Minho turned towards Taemin, still having that sad look of desperation that Key could relate with so well. "Tell me, then. What the fuck happened?"
Taemin sobbed a few more times, but composed himself enough to speak, "It wasn't like that. None of it. I just... I didn't know what I felt. I was scared because you'd been hanging out with your hyungs so much. I didn't want you to leave me, but I didn't know what to do and he wouldn't stop talking to me. Every day Jonghyun kept telling me to give messages to Key or tell Key something, but I just wanted him to leave me alone because I had enough to deal with without his problems too. Eventually, he started asking about me and you and it just slipped. I told him how I felt and all my insecurities and I don't know if he was taking advantage of me or if he was just sad too, but we were good for each other at the moment. All we did was talk about how we felt. We didn't even hang out except for two times. The second time I had decided I was going to cheat on you, but..." he took a minute to sob a couple times and then start back up, "We kissed. It felt weird and wrong and I hated it so I pushed him off and told him I didn't want to. He said he felt it wasn't any good either and so he left and nothing ever came of it and we eventually stopped talking. Then, I went on vacation, but I felt guilty because you kept saying all these things about how you'd love me forever and before I knew it I was home and I couldn't stand to look you in the eye just like right now. Minho, I'm sorry, and I love you, but I don't know if I can even forgive myself for doing what I did."
It was a lot to take in.
Key and Onew really didn't find it their place to speak or move and so the two of them stood still as rocks. Everything was completely silent besides Taemin's sobs.
Then, there were a few footsteps through the grass and next thing anyone saw or heard was Minho embracing Taemin who was sobbing harder by this point.
"You're such an idiot, Taemin. You think I care about any of that?" Minho whispered, barely audible over Taemin's continuous sobs.
"I-I-I- Minho, I-" Taemin hiccuped through his words, but was cut off when Minho pressed his lips to Taemin's.
Key thought it was a beautiful sight if he'd ever seen one.
~
Thirty minutes later, both Minho and Taemin were tucked away in Key's room and he was able to make his way down to the living room where Onew was waiting. He took his time and could feel Onew's eyes on him all the way to where he sat down on the couch.
"Hey," Onew said when Key was situated.
"Hey," Key replied in a sigh.
"I don't want that to be us."
It took a minute for Key to process that Onew even said anything, but when he came to he asked, "What?"
Onew shuffled to turn towards Key, "I don't want to be like that, feeling so unsure that it goes to the lengths of cheating or that we're so scared to let it be over when it's over that we hold on until we're suffocating ourselves. I don't want that for us."
Key looked at Onew for a moment before asking, "So, what do you want?"
Onew didn't have to think about it, "You."
Before Key knew it, he was pinned down by the older boy, mouth being invaded in every sense of the word. Then, Onew's hands were all over him and shirts, pants, socks, and underwear were all discarded in a hastey fashion.
Key let himself be consumed by the feeling of Onew and didn't protest one bit when one thing led to another.
In the aftermath, they lay cuddled up on the couch under a quilt Key's grandmother had made long ago and he couldn't have cared less. There was no place else he would rather be.
He let Onew pull him in as he began to whisper sweet-nothings into his ear, "You're beautiful, wonderful, amazing. I need you. I love you, God, Kibum, I love you."
Key felt his breath hitch a little bit, but answered in a whisper, "I love you too, Lee Jinki."
And both were sure that nothing could ever come close to being as perfect as this very moment.
The End
_______________________________________________________
Keep an eye out for the epilogue! ;]
Author: fiar22
Rating: pg-13
Genre: ANGST, romance, some smut
Warning: language is strong in this chapter. Also, implied sex.
Summary: Kim Kibum and Kim Jonghyun had the perfect relationship, right? They had everything, right? WRONG. But Key finds out the hard way and has to work towards getting over it so that he move forward and maybe find someone new. (summary sucks cause this started out as a one-shot XD)
Author's note: GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUYS omg. This is the last chapter. OMG. Although, I plan to make an epilogue, but still.... GUUUUUUUUUUUYS this is the first SHINee fic I've finished. omg. this is all so exciting. someone like this. Please? :P Anyway, enjoy.
OH BUT WAIT. I forgot. This chapter was heavily influenced by this and it actually happens to be the song that plays when Key does the deal with the CD. So, keep that in mind.
After a full week of Dawson's Creek, Key was finally watching Joey leave Dawson for what he wished was the last time and make her way to Pacey's boat. He knew it sounded stupid, but he was comparing this to his own situation. Jonghyun wanted him back, but it was no longer Jonghyun that Key wanted. He wanted Onew. What if Pacey decided he didn't want Joey? What if she didn't make it to the boat and he really didn't care to look back? What if Onew didn't want him?
Key probably could have cried, but he didn't see how much good it would do. Besides, Taemin already did enough crying for the both of them during the week he stayed at Key's house. Honestly, Key was surprised Taemin's parents' weren't more concerned, but he assumed that they understood because of the second-hand story he heard about Minho trying to break into Taemin's house. Sadly for Minho, Taemin hadn't been there since he'd broken up with him.
The initial thoughts in Key's head had been to worry drastically over Minho, and when he heard that story it became the case ten-folds. He did the only natural thing and excused himself to the bathroom and tried to call Minho to see if he was even alive. Unluckily, Minho didn't answer. Or should he say luckily? Because instead of Minho, it was Onew. At first, Key hadn't known what to say.
"Oh. Hey."
"If you're calling to see if he's okay, the answer is no. He's a complete mess, but I've got him."
"So, you know?"
"Yeah. Taemin at your house?"
"Yeah, has been for a couple days now."
Silence.
"Hey, Key?"
"Yeah?"
"When this is all blown over, we should talk."
"Yeah, okay." and then the conversation was over.
Really, it hadn't been much, but it'd been all Key could think about even with Taemin sobbing all over the place.
"It looks like we're going to have to go to my house and get that fourth season," Taemin sniffled.
Key sighed, "We are not going anywhere. You should try to take a nap or drink some water. I will go and get the dvd from your house."
Taemin seemed to want to protest, but he didn't really have the motivation to do so, "Okay."
Key pushed himself up, absent-mindedly grabbing his keys, his phone, and Onew's phone. The whole week he'd been carrying it around not really sure what to do with it and Onew hadn't mentioned it on the phone, so he decided he better keep it as dear to him as his own phone. It had been wedged between the middle of Key's SUV's back seat and was not hard to find. Key had wondered if Onew had purposely left it there.
When he was finally at Taemin's house it wasn't too hard to get in. After all, he knew where the spare key was and Taemin's dog's were nothing to be scared of. He took a minute to pet the two of them.
"Hey, Adam. Hey, Eve. How are you guys? Are you lonely? Taeminnie will be back soon, I promise," he cooed as he put his fingers through their fur. They licked at his hands and panted at him expectantly.
He got up and made his way to Taemin's room. The room looked a bit like Taemin had been kidnapped in mid-action. There was a shirt on the floor and the chair to his desk was scooted out as if he'd just went to the other room and would be right back. Plus, the bed wasn't made and that seemed a little bit unusual for Taemin.
Key sighed and made his way over to the shelf that held tons of cases for CDs and DVDs. He slowly skimmed through them with his finger, looking for anything that had a big "D" on it. Just when he thought he should give up, he found it and smiled, feeling accomplished.
However, he didn't get up just yet. Something seemed to be keeping him there and he kept looking at the shelf. He felt himself grab toward it and pull something out, a blank CD case with a home-made CD in it. It read Our Love on the front, written and decorated by Taemin.
Key wasn't really one to snoop, but he wanted to listen to this CD. So, he made his way over to Taemin's CD player and put it in.
Then, Eve let out a whine that caught Key's attention.
Key smiled down at her, "What number do you think I should try?"
She pawed at his leg twice.
"Two? I was thinking four," he frowned, but then a light-bulb went off in his head. "How about we add them together? We'll listen to six," and so he turned the player to number six and hit play.
He sat himself on Taemin's unmade bed and prepared himself, but he really wasn't ready for what he heard. This song, it held memories for him. "Pretty recent memories," he thought to himself.
Suddenly, he was back to that night at the party with Onew. This song had played there right before Onew and him had decided to take it upstairs. They had been slow dancing extremely close, hands all over each other, practically groping each other for the world to see. Another thing he remembered was seeing Minho looking particularly lonely with a heartbreaking smile out of the corner of his eye. What had this song meant for them?
He picked up the empty CD case and took out the booklook in the front. He flipped to the page that explained number six and before he could finish reading he stuffed it back into the case. He looked over to the dogs, "Seems like this song was made for everyone's first time, huh?" He shook the image out of his head and pushed stop on the CD player.
He picked up the DVD he came for and then walked out the door. Taemin's house suddenly felt very dreary and he could almost feel the memories it was filled with. It almost reminded him of when he and Jonghyn had broken up. It was pretty evident why Taemin couldn't stand to be there.
Key took the drive home pretty glumly. He didn't turn on the radio or anything, just sat in silence. Though, it honestly could have been worse and Onew had said he wanted to talk to him, so maybe things wouldn't be so bad for him. But it was Taemin he was worried about.
He was in mid thought when he arrived at his house to see a scene he didn't exactly expect.
Onew was standing, looking horrified, behind a beligerent Minho who was screaming at Taemin, the younger man holding tight to one of Key's stuffed animals and sobbing. Before Key got out of the car he made note that Minho looked like he hadn't eaten, slept, or done much of anything in the last week. His eyes were red and puffy as if he hadn't stopped crying, but at the same time they were wide and angry.
Key tried to make no sense of Minho's yelling as he approached the scene. "What the hell is going on?" he asked Onew.
"He got out. He's drunk and stronger than me," Onew said, looking wearily at Minho who seemed to have just noticed Key's arrival.
"Good, fucking, gosh. Thank you, god because good ol' Kibummie Kibum is here now. I was thinking you would miss this," Minho slurred.
"Minho, what are you doing?"
"You know, this doesn't concern you, blondie. I'm here to expose the truth about my SLUT of an ex-boyfriend," he spat with a furiousity not seen before.
"What the fuck are you-"
"Shut it, blondie. Taeminnie here has tons of secrets," Minho cooed.
Taemin was looking more and more fragile by the second. He wasn't even trying to keep his tears from flowing and he was looking at the ground.
"Obviously, I'm nothing much. Just faithful ol'Minho for nothing but sex and good times. I dance with people to make others jealous and get to watch everyone else live their party lives," he threw his hands up for emphasis. "However, I would like to say I do have one thing and that is Taemin, or did have him so I thought. See, I was a good boyfriend and I went around with him wherever he would go and wanted nothing but to make him happy. I was good to you, right Taeminnie?" he looked almost pleadingly at Taemin who he had just been yelling at and Taemin couldn't find it in himself to answer.
"Minho," Onew started gently, but the younger boy was having none of it.
"Shut up," Minho spat and looked back at Taemin. "Well, obviously not good enough, huh? You needed something extra on the side, didn't ya?"
Key crossed his arms, "What the fuck are you talking about, Minho?"
Taemin continued to sob quietly.
"I'm talking about your ex fucking my ex. Though it may not be a thing to you, he was still my boyfriend until a week ago when he broke my fucking heart and stomped it to pieces before I found out this lovely piece of information."
Key just stood there.
"See? Nothing to really say. You look a little but disgruntled Key. Was he fucking you too? Maybe Onew? Or maybe he was-" but Minho didn't get to finish his rant.
"STOP. JUST SHUT UP," Taemin finally spoke up and it rattled everyone.
Minho turned towards Taemin, still having that sad look of desperation that Key could relate with so well. "Tell me, then. What the fuck happened?"
Taemin sobbed a few more times, but composed himself enough to speak, "It wasn't like that. None of it. I just... I didn't know what I felt. I was scared because you'd been hanging out with your hyungs so much. I didn't want you to leave me, but I didn't know what to do and he wouldn't stop talking to me. Every day Jonghyun kept telling me to give messages to Key or tell Key something, but I just wanted him to leave me alone because I had enough to deal with without his problems too. Eventually, he started asking about me and you and it just slipped. I told him how I felt and all my insecurities and I don't know if he was taking advantage of me or if he was just sad too, but we were good for each other at the moment. All we did was talk about how we felt. We didn't even hang out except for two times. The second time I had decided I was going to cheat on you, but..." he took a minute to sob a couple times and then start back up, "We kissed. It felt weird and wrong and I hated it so I pushed him off and told him I didn't want to. He said he felt it wasn't any good either and so he left and nothing ever came of it and we eventually stopped talking. Then, I went on vacation, but I felt guilty because you kept saying all these things about how you'd love me forever and before I knew it I was home and I couldn't stand to look you in the eye just like right now. Minho, I'm sorry, and I love you, but I don't know if I can even forgive myself for doing what I did."
It was a lot to take in.
Key and Onew really didn't find it their place to speak or move and so the two of them stood still as rocks. Everything was completely silent besides Taemin's sobs.
Then, there were a few footsteps through the grass and next thing anyone saw or heard was Minho embracing Taemin who was sobbing harder by this point.
"You're such an idiot, Taemin. You think I care about any of that?" Minho whispered, barely audible over Taemin's continuous sobs.
"I-I-I- Minho, I-" Taemin hiccuped through his words, but was cut off when Minho pressed his lips to Taemin's.
Key thought it was a beautiful sight if he'd ever seen one.
~
Thirty minutes later, both Minho and Taemin were tucked away in Key's room and he was able to make his way down to the living room where Onew was waiting. He took his time and could feel Onew's eyes on him all the way to where he sat down on the couch.
"Hey," Onew said when Key was situated.
"Hey," Key replied in a sigh.
"I don't want that to be us."
It took a minute for Key to process that Onew even said anything, but when he came to he asked, "What?"
Onew shuffled to turn towards Key, "I don't want to be like that, feeling so unsure that it goes to the lengths of cheating or that we're so scared to let it be over when it's over that we hold on until we're suffocating ourselves. I don't want that for us."
Key looked at Onew for a moment before asking, "So, what do you want?"
Onew didn't have to think about it, "You."
Before Key knew it, he was pinned down by the older boy, mouth being invaded in every sense of the word. Then, Onew's hands were all over him and shirts, pants, socks, and underwear were all discarded in a hastey fashion.
Key let himself be consumed by the feeling of Onew and didn't protest one bit when one thing led to another.
In the aftermath, they lay cuddled up on the couch under a quilt Key's grandmother had made long ago and he couldn't have cared less. There was no place else he would rather be.
He let Onew pull him in as he began to whisper sweet-nothings into his ear, "You're beautiful, wonderful, amazing. I need you. I love you, God, Kibum, I love you."
Key felt his breath hitch a little bit, but answered in a whisper, "I love you too, Lee Jinki."
And both were sure that nothing could ever come close to being as perfect as this very moment.
The End
_______________________________________________________
Keep an eye out for the epilogue! ;]