Daily Prophet - Sports Section
Date: Friday, 2 June, 2000
Time: Morning Edition
Characters Involved: The Daily Prophet
Rating: G
IS SHE OR ISN’T SHE?
By “Pitch” Malbum
Holyhead Harpies spokeswitch Darla Dorfingerling refused to comment on rumours rampant on the pitch that one of the new Harpie recruits, a Chaser, is not a witch, but a Veela. Recent visitors to the Harpies home practice pitch in Holyhead were of mixed opinions on whether one of the players might have been using some kind of persuasion other than talent to score on the field.
When this reporter contacted Meaghan McCormack, current keeper for the Pride of Portree who face the Holyhead Harpies on Opening Day next week, she was pleased to comment on this rumour. “Don’t be asking me about Veelas, Pitch,” she stated emphatically, “As Keeper for the Pride, the goal is safe with me.” Miss McCormack then retreated to the “ladies” portion of the Pride’s locker room. Faithful Prophet readers will remember Miss McCormack’s talented mother, Catriona, former team captain and Chaser for the Pride who led them to two League wins in the 1960’s.
“Blarney! Pure unadulterated Blarney!” was the response by Kenmare Kestrel’s owner Sean O’Casey as he left the visitor’s area of the Harpies home pitch. He has reason to worry as his team will be playing the Harpies in the second week of this season. “Pay no mind to Sean,” said his team manager Leyland “the Q” Shelsher, former high scoring Chaser for the Wimbourne Wasps. “He’s still under the ‘Veela’ effects of the young lady in question. We expect to ask Q.U.A.C.K. to look into the matter prior to opening day,” muttered Sanderson, as he led the protesting O’Casey away.
The MoM Department of Magical Games and Sports and International Association of Quidditch would only state that to date no inquiry regarding the young lady has been filed with their offices.