Home is Where the Heart Lies
Date: Tuesday, 10 April, 2001
Time: Just After Dawn
Location: Isle of Lewis
Characters Involved: Remus Lupin and Severus Snape
Rating: NC-17 (because really, UST can only be stretched over so many months)
There was a small, worn plaque no bigger than a matchbook, nailed to the frame above the door. The words were so faded by sun and rain and wind, he could only read them from memory:
To make a happy fireside clime, to weans and wife, that's the true pathos and sublime of human life. ~ Robert Burns
To the young man and child he had been, the old stone house on the mountainside had indeed been 'a happy fireside clime'. A mother's voice had called from the kitchen window, beckoning father and son in to dinner of an evening. After dessert, a young father had settled his small son into his lap by the fire to read stories of real life heroes before bed. There had been tears as well as laughter. But, until now, there had never since been as much love.
Staring at what remained of his childhood home, Remus felt surrounded by the ghosts of times long past. A part of the front outer wall had crumbled, but it didn't look as if the inner wall had been breached. Listening to the way the chilled breeze buzzed around the small house his enhanced hearing picked up what he thought was the faint sound of wind through cracked or broken windows still unseen. And yet, the door stood sturdy and the roof seemed sound. He'd know more once they got out of the misty mountain morning and into the house; but the structure seemed solid.
If only his nerves were as steady.
The run-in with Greyback two days earlier had truly unnerved him, more than he was ready to admit, even to himself. After Severus had left to meet Bill the day before, Remus had lain in bed running the incident over and over in his head, seeking any moment that might prove he had, indeed, held the upper hand despite appearances.
It had been a futile search.
He had lost the contest of wills, lost his temper, and perhaps only accomplished the further endangerment of his entire pack -- both werewolf and extended 'family'. The only conclusion he had been able to come to was that he would warn the others, but would not settle on a course of action until he could discuss the matter with Severus and Glamis. Remus could lead his little family through many difficulties. But, Fenrir Greyback still had the ability to reduce him to a terrified little boy inside, hiding from the monster in the night.
Not that Greyback was the only heavy thought upon his mind.
The dark man who accompanied him held more than a large portion of his attention as well. While it was true he did want to check his father's records to see if there was anything left of David Lupin's work that might help Severus and Ginny in their work researching various methods of curing -- or at least lessening the side effects of -- the curse, he also had other reasons for asking Severus to join him on this trip, when he had never invited the other man on his excursions to visit his parents' graves in the past.
In the twenty plus years since he had laid his parents to rest around the side of the house, just hidden from their view at the moment, he had not once set foot inside the house itself. Despite many solo trips to the grave site, he had not been able to bring himself to open that door and face the ghosts of what he had lost. Now that he intended to do just that, he rather thought he might need the sure, quiet support of the man who had come to mean as much or more to Remus as the family he had lost.
And that was the other reason he had wanted Severus to come here to this place -- perhaps the most nerve-wracking. More and more as each day had gone by over the last three months, the need to tell the other man exactly how much he had become a part of Remus' very being had grown to an almost unbearable burn each time they were in each other's presence. Still, every time he thought he might finally speak what was in his heart, he backed down. 'Not yet ready,' he told himself.
Here, in the place that had once been the physical embodiment of love and home to his teenage mind, he thought he might finally be able to grasp his Gryffindor's courage fully and say the words he had not told another living soul since he was nineteen.
"Well, this is it." Smiling, Remus gestured toward the house that was not even as large as the house on Spinner's End must have been before Severus enlarged it for the pack and turned to gauge the other man's reaction. "It's not much, but at one time I called it home."
Time: Just After Dawn
Location: Isle of Lewis
Characters Involved: Remus Lupin and Severus Snape
Rating: NC-17 (because really, UST can only be stretched over so many months)
There was a small, worn plaque no bigger than a matchbook, nailed to the frame above the door. The words were so faded by sun and rain and wind, he could only read them from memory:
To make a happy fireside clime, to weans and wife, that's the true pathos and sublime of human life. ~ Robert Burns
To the young man and child he had been, the old stone house on the mountainside had indeed been 'a happy fireside clime'. A mother's voice had called from the kitchen window, beckoning father and son in to dinner of an evening. After dessert, a young father had settled his small son into his lap by the fire to read stories of real life heroes before bed. There had been tears as well as laughter. But, until now, there had never since been as much love.
Staring at what remained of his childhood home, Remus felt surrounded by the ghosts of times long past. A part of the front outer wall had crumbled, but it didn't look as if the inner wall had been breached. Listening to the way the chilled breeze buzzed around the small house his enhanced hearing picked up what he thought was the faint sound of wind through cracked or broken windows still unseen. And yet, the door stood sturdy and the roof seemed sound. He'd know more once they got out of the misty mountain morning and into the house; but the structure seemed solid.
If only his nerves were as steady.
The run-in with Greyback two days earlier had truly unnerved him, more than he was ready to admit, even to himself. After Severus had left to meet Bill the day before, Remus had lain in bed running the incident over and over in his head, seeking any moment that might prove he had, indeed, held the upper hand despite appearances.
It had been a futile search.
He had lost the contest of wills, lost his temper, and perhaps only accomplished the further endangerment of his entire pack -- both werewolf and extended 'family'. The only conclusion he had been able to come to was that he would warn the others, but would not settle on a course of action until he could discuss the matter with Severus and Glamis. Remus could lead his little family through many difficulties. But, Fenrir Greyback still had the ability to reduce him to a terrified little boy inside, hiding from the monster in the night.
Not that Greyback was the only heavy thought upon his mind.
The dark man who accompanied him held more than a large portion of his attention as well. While it was true he did want to check his father's records to see if there was anything left of David Lupin's work that might help Severus and Ginny in their work researching various methods of curing -- or at least lessening the side effects of -- the curse, he also had other reasons for asking Severus to join him on this trip, when he had never invited the other man on his excursions to visit his parents' graves in the past.
In the twenty plus years since he had laid his parents to rest around the side of the house, just hidden from their view at the moment, he had not once set foot inside the house itself. Despite many solo trips to the grave site, he had not been able to bring himself to open that door and face the ghosts of what he had lost. Now that he intended to do just that, he rather thought he might need the sure, quiet support of the man who had come to mean as much or more to Remus as the family he had lost.
And that was the other reason he had wanted Severus to come here to this place -- perhaps the most nerve-wracking. More and more as each day had gone by over the last three months, the need to tell the other man exactly how much he had become a part of Remus' very being had grown to an almost unbearable burn each time they were in each other's presence. Still, every time he thought he might finally speak what was in his heart, he backed down. 'Not yet ready,' he told himself.
Here, in the place that had once been the physical embodiment of love and home to his teenage mind, he thought he might finally be able to grasp his Gryffindor's courage fully and say the words he had not told another living soul since he was nineteen.
"Well, this is it." Smiling, Remus gestured toward the house that was not even as large as the house on Spinner's End must have been before Severus enlarged it for the pack and turned to gauge the other man's reaction. "It's not much, but at one time I called it home."