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seraphim_grace March 15 2012, 13:24:33 UTC
i grieve with thee
I'm Irish and believe a wake should celebrate the person, although very few other countries understand that
on your way home get a bottle of HIS favourite, and set out a glass for him, pour it out (traditionally a third glass would go to the devil) and then drink, at least one and talk to him as if he WAS there, laugh and comiserate and enjoy his company one last time

at first you'll feel like a fool, but I'm sure he'd appreciate it just as much if not more, because he was your friend and that way you're treating him just like one.

it gets easier you know, it doesn't get better, just eventually you get better at dealing with it.

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fieryredqueen March 16 2012, 06:09:28 UTC
Thank you.
I've only been to two wakes and they were both in these ridiculous funeral homes, that are so generic and sanitized, and of course you have to sit in pews as though at church even though Jesse was an atheist. No personality at all whatsoever, just a slideshow of photos on a flatscreen above the casket. And, of course, a stiff painted embalmed body like an overly made-up mannequin. I lost it for a bit when I saw him lying there like that. So wrong. And no liquor at all, to toast with. American middle class wakes are absolutely awful.

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seraphim_grace March 16 2012, 11:05:36 UTC
one thing the Irish do right by is the dead ( ... )

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fieryredqueen March 16 2012, 06:09:53 UTC
Thanks. That was rather wrenching.

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fieryredqueen March 16 2012, 06:10:51 UTC
Thank you. I never want to do that again. Statistically it's unlikely I won't have to though. Ugh.

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