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eclectic_writer October 4 2008, 14:26:26 UTC
Oh I loved it!! Robert and Sunny, I didn't even see it coming but it's such a perfect thing. Poor Robert, being unable to handle Cammie in the relationship and therefore losing JD.

Wow though. You got their voices PERFECTLY from this 'verse! Being put into memories for sure. :D

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filenotch October 4 2008, 22:29:20 UTC
Thank you. I had good advice on the voices from ivorygates. I don't think I would have ever posted this if she hadn't agreed to beta.

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azurelunatic October 4 2008, 14:31:44 UTC
I had to pause this to go to work. This is gorgeous and painful and gorgeous.

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filenotch October 4 2008, 22:29:45 UTC
Thank you.

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tesserae_ October 4 2008, 14:53:47 UTC
Yep, this is it. The emotional lines are a lot clearer, and how you handle JD at the end works well - having him give Robert the gift of Sunny captured his essential kindness in a quiet understated kind of way.

And this line: for a moment the tattoos looked like wings folded tightly down is just gorgeous, everything Robert doesn't know about JD but knows, and it sets up the movement toward him getting it right in the end. Really nice writing...

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filenotch October 4 2008, 22:31:55 UTC
Well, I wouldn't have known to clarify them if you hadn't politely kicked me in the backside.

Yeah, JD is kind, although it wasn't a word I would have thought to apply had synecdochic not used it.

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synecdochic October 4 2008, 22:39:48 UTC
It's one of those kindnesses that looks like cruelty, indifference, or mockery unless your eyes are attuned to a very certain frequency, but kindness it is. Cammie tends to say that JD is one of the kindest people she knows, and that is, I think, one of the reasons why JD loves her so much: that she can see the kindness for what it really is.

(Then again, a surgeon cutting out a cancerous tumor is being kind, no matter how much it might hurt in the short run ...)

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filenotch October 5 2008, 01:20:01 UTC
"Grandmotherly kindness." It's a Zen thing.

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filenotch October 4 2008, 22:38:16 UTC
Yep, JD sent him home. They'll figure it out. Sunny has few illusions about Robert, but Robert's going to figure out he didn't know Sunny anywhere near as deeply as he thought he did.

Thank you for the rec.

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folk October 4 2008, 18:12:23 UTC
Here via IG and Syn, and glad I did ( ... )

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filenotch October 4 2008, 23:09:00 UTC
Thank you for the amazing feedback. Yes, I invented a slang word, thinking that five or six years from now, hot might go out of style. I mean, who says fox any more, right?

I referenced the Crowley quote for a couple of reasons, although I like your take on the Lucifer connection. Mostly I was thinking about how one could read the Adoration as referring to JB himself in a way, from the line Unity uttermost showed! JD shows himself as a unified person, but he's got khabs and khu issues, if you get my drift.

And, someone got the Crowley reference. Cool!

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folk October 4 2008, 23:29:36 UTC
That's hot. (Sorry.) And JD would absolutely say "fox". Possibly even "hottie".

Moving onto a Syn-esque reader-interpretation set of thoughts,the Lucifer reference hit me with and for a moment the tattoos looked like wings folded tightly down, although it's now striking me that perhaps he's closer to Raphael than Lucifer in M-verse, although of course closer to Michael in BW-verse. (Much, much closer.)

I like the duality interpretation of khabs and khu, but I end up striking into the holistic grey-area issues that I always run into with duality-based systems and structures. Hi! I'm a pomo homo, please feel free to take some of this lovely unwillingness to come down on one side or the other of anything.

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filenotch October 5 2008, 01:13:18 UTC
Well, I'm the opposite of pomo, being trained to the bone in logical positivism (biomedical science, terminal degree). If nothing else, my science background has made me less of a dualist than my "weird esoteric stuff" background. The idea of the khu being the body and the khabs the secret light hidden within the body, really applies to JD for me. He's had to struggle a lot with who he his and the body he wears. Also all that stuff about making the gods and death tremble before him. The light is mine; its rays consume
Me: I have made a secret door
Into the House of Ra and Tum,
Sound like a star gate?

Anyway, it's a bodymind, not one or the other. The answer to the nature or nurture question (or almost any either/or duality) is, "Yes."

(And I was being totally non-esoteric with that line about JD's tattoos, and referring entirely to Broken Wings. Shallow, that's me.)

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