It has come to my attention that the girls dorms were raided on the other night ( Read more... )

Well, that time is upon us, children ( Read more... )

I know that we haven't met before.
My name is Porky Minch, the Philosophy teacher for this school.

Hm...
This is going to sound odd, but I want to schedule an appointment.
I already trust you with my problems more than I trust Mask with them.

Can you help a fellow teacher out, Mr. Weavile?
Also, don't tell the other staff members.
They'll never let me ( Read more... )

Please accept my mind's cries.
Please regret for me.
Please love me.

However, it is hopeless.
When have mama and papa ever pat my head?
Because I had grown fat, I was never held by mama.

Please regret for me.

"If only I had not given birth to you,"

Why do you say such things?
You are so insensitive.

Please accept my mind's cries.
However, it is hopeless.

I ( Read more... )

I've taken a look and another at the list of students here.
And what did I see?
Poo.
The little Prince of Dalaam is here, right in Sumabura.
I welcome you and your shiny head, Prince.
So, the Four Heroes have gathered here, and so have I, Porky Minch, the enemy to them.
I propose that we celebrate this occasion.

To celebrate, I will host a dinner party at ( Read more... )

Let me tell you what really happened.
The other week, I had a snake in my home. A snake, a cat, and an ape.
Those idiots, Snake, Samus, and Falcon, actually charged into my home and wrecked the place.
You can't imagine how angry I am right now.
So, I'll have to speed up my plans a little bit more, now that they're onto me.

The heroes are joining with ( Read more... )

Did you miss me?
Good.
I've returned after managing my house just a little bit.
Not everything has been repaired, but they'll get to it in time.
Say good bye to Colonel. You won't see him for a long, long time.
Damn Pig Mask, people liking him better than me...
I've missed you guys so much.
That's why, to make up for everything, I'm going to give every ( Read more... )

What fools they are to invade my tower like this.
And they just had to go break everything I spent such a long time building.
It's going to take a while to repair all of this...
However, they'll understand the true power of the Pig King.
I'm going to take my revenge against them one way or another.
I hate losing... I'm not going to lose against those ( Read more... )

Um ( Read more... )

Um... I have in my hand a letter from King P himself.
It's about the tournament.
Let me read it to you.

"Don't think I'm backing out.
Because I'm not.

I have to cancel the tournament because of financial issues.
Damn repair fees I have to make...

Guess the money's all mine
Hah!
You idiots wouldn't have lasted a single second against me.

Think of this as my ( Read more... )