Fic: Lifestyle Choices (Numb3rs, Don Eppes / Martin, Charlie Eppes / Colby Granger)
Title: Lifestyle Choices
Fandom: Numb3rs
Pair: Charlie Eppes / Colby Granger,
David Sinclair / Ian Edgerton,
Don Eppes / Martin Fridegord
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine, etc.
Feedback: Always Welcome
NUMB3RS Main List
“Are you serious?” Martin tilted his head and look at him carefully. Don felt like a bug under a microscope.
“Yeah.”
“Never?”
“Never.”
“Are you kidding?”
“No. I mean, I’ve been to regular nightclubs, but never any….. pink establishments.”
“We’ve been together for almost two years, you can say it. You’ve never been to a gay club.”
“I never had a reason to go!”
“What reason do you need besides the fact that you’re living with a man? You don’t need to dress up in a pink tank top and a sequined cowboy hat to get in.”
“Really?”
“Don’t look so surprised.”
“I didn’t mean that. I just…. I wouldn’t know how to act. When I go to a normal club I know what I’m doing.”
“What do you do?”
Don shrugged. “Get some drinks, maybe dance if there’s some good company available.”
“That’s exactly the same thing people do in gay clubs. Except that after dancing people take their dance partners to the bathroom and join the non-stop orgies.”
Don just stared at him.
“You can’t be that gullible! I was kidding.” Martin chuckled.
“It’s not my fault! I’ve been with two guys, first one was a onetime deal, and the other one was…. well, you. I’ve never…. tried to get into that whole lifestyle.”
“Lifestyle? The only difference in lifestyle is that you’re sleeping with a guy, everything else is the same.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, but we gotta do something about it. You know Liebling?”
“No…..”
“The nightclub.”
“Still no.”
“Anyway, it’s a really upscale place. Good music, good drinks. You’ll see what it’s all about.”
“Why are you suddenly so eager to go? We’ve been together for ages an we’ve never been clubbing.”
“You said you’ve never been in a gay club.” Martin wrapped his hands on Don’s waist and pulled him closer. “And clubbing is a lot more fun when you know you’re gonna go home with a hot guy.”
“Why do you always win every argument?”
“We’re not arguing. I’m telling you what we’re gonna do, and you’ll agree.”
“See what I mean?”
-----------------------------------------
“Okay, tell me what you think?” Don yelled through the bathroom door.
“Let’s see.”
Don opened the door and came out. Martin couldn’t control his laughter.
“What the hell were you thinking?”
“People dress like this to those places.” Don explained. “Don’t they?”
Martin looked at Don’s overly torn jeans and two sizes too small T-shirt.
“No, they don’t. Have you been watching Queer as Folk again?”
“No.” He denied, but it isn’t sound very convincing.
“I’ve told you before: That show is a joke. Come on, take those off. I’ll pick your clothes.”
“Like that’s unusual….”
“What?”
“Nothing.”
Martin rummaged through the closet and pulled out a pair of jeans and a dark denim shirt. “Try these.”
“Okay. I was just trying to think what would look gay.”
“Look gay? Let me ask you something. Can you imagine me dressed like that?”
“No.”
“Colby?”
“No.”
“David?”
“No.”
“Ian?”
“No.”
“Charlie?”
“Yeah. I mean no.”
“See a pattern here?”
“Okay, you made your point.” Don pulled the shirt on. “Are you sure this is okay?”
“You look great. You’re gonna be pushing away guys as soon as we walk in.”
“Guys?” Don suddenly looked absolutely panicking.
“You know what they are, don’t you? Animals with three legs.”
“What do they do? At the club?”
Martin had to laugh again. “They may come and try to strike up a conversation. Nothing you can’t handle.”
“Wait a minute. How do I get rid of them?”
“Tell them you’re not interested. And if somebody wants to show you his glowstick, he probably doesn’t mean those shiny, plastic things.”
TBC