Fic: Brotherly Advice (Criminal Minds, Aaron Hotchner)
Title: Brotherly Advice
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Pair: Spencer Reid / Derek Morgan (mentioned),
Aaron Hotchner,
Sean Hotchner
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine, etc.
Feedback: Always Welcome
Criminal Minds Main List
Follows:
Snowed In, Chapter 1
Snowed In, Chapter 2
Snowed In, Chapter 3
Hotch dumped his bags on the floor of the foyeur, and marched to the living room. He poured himself a shot of brandy and slouched down on one of the overstuffed armchairs. Less than thirty seconds later the doorbell rang. Hoch left his glass on the coffee table and marched to the door, ready to tear the head off from the visitor.
“Hey, bro.” Sean greeted and breezed in.
“What the hell do you want?”
“Sorry, I didn’t know I was banned from seeing my big bro.” Sean deadpanned.
“Sorry, we had a long case. I just got back. And last night was…. restless.”
“You want me to leave?”
“No, but I’m really not in the talking mood.” Hotch slumped back to his chair and took his drink.
“Solitary drinking, grouchy mood and that whole I-don’t-wanna-talk thing. This is just like when Hailey left.” Sean sat down on an armchair opposite Hotch.
“Don’t start.”
“Okay, let’s talk about me. Are you gonna share that?” He pointed to Hotch`s glass.
“Get one yourself.”
“Okay.” He got up and poured himself a drink. “Guess who I`m meeting for lunch tomorrow.”
“I give up.”
“Karen.”
“Who’s Karen?”
“You’ve met her.”
“I’m pretty sure I haven’t.”
“Maybe it was Caroline…..”
“Maybe.”
“It was something like that, Carla or Carole, or Calleigh, or Cholera….”
“Just admit you can’t remember.”
“I can’t remember.” Sean grinned. “But I’ll find out tomorrow. That’s kinda why I’m here. I need a tie.”
“You came all the way here for a tie?”
“When was the last time you saw me wearing a tie?”
“Good point. Bedroom, third closet from the left and stay away from my work ties.”
“No need to worry about them. Most of your work ties are either black or gray.”
Sean got up and marched upstairs. Hotch almost managed to drink himself to a nice, warm, fuzzy state before he heard footsteps coming down the stairs.
“Bro?”
“Did you find a good one?”
“A really good one….” Sean chuckled. “I thought Hailey took all her things with her.”
“She did and some of mine too.”
“So why did she leave this to you?”
Hotch turned to see what the other man was talking about. Sean was holding several ties and one rather larger dildo in his hands and grinned like a lunatic.
“That…. that’s…..”
“Not hers? I kinda guessed that. I should applaud you.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I actually thought you were too far gone for anything fun. This is the first sign of any not-so-by-the-book-in-alphabetical-order leanings.”
“I’m not… I mean I haven’t….”
“Bro, everyone’s tried it sometimes. Remember when I was in highschool?”
“Yeah….”
“Remember my study sessions with Connor?”
“You mean you….?” Hotch stared at him with his mouth open.
“They were really hard lessons.” Sean chuckled. “So what about you? Just target practising or have you tried the real deal?” His question was accompanied by a rude gesture with the toy.
“No! I mean…. no.”
“Curiosity or planning?”
“What?”
“Are you just curious to know what it feels like or are trying to get ready for something? Or somebody.”
Hotch took his most severe don’t-mess-with-me- look.
“Judging by that look, it’s the latter. Somebody I know?”
“I’m not planning or preparing, he’s not available, and I-” Hotch paused. “Why the hell am I talking to you about this?”
“Because this is my area. Well…. Not guys but sex and all the stuff that comes before and after. Who is it? Somebody I know?”
Hotch didn’t answer.
“So it’s somebody I know. Who do I know that you know….. Wait, somebody from your office?”
Still no answer.
“I’ll take that as a Yes. That old crow, whatever-his-name-is?”
“Gideon, and it’s not him.”
“Good, because that whole thought creates some really creepy mental images….. That younger guy, teaches martial arts… Martin?”
“Morgan. And no.”
“So who’s left…. That brainy guy who couldn’t stop talking. Rudd.”
“Reid.”
“And no No’s this time. So it’s him.”
“I’m not admitting anything.”
“Hey, I can understand the appeal. I fooled around with a brainy protégé couple years ago. They know exactly where to touch and how to-”
“I don’t want to know!”
“You do! So he’s taken.”
“Yeah, he moved in with Morgan.”
“That same Morgan?”
“Yeah.”
“Talk about small circles….. Are you sure they’re gonna stay together?”
Hotch nodded.
“Then you better forget it. World’s full of guys and most of them are ready to bend over after a few drinks.”
“Firstly, I didn’t want to hear that, especially from my baby brother! Secondly, that’s not the point. I don’t want some other guy. I’m too old to settle for a replacement.”
“Then you have just one option left.”
“What?”
“Crawl back to Hailey.”
“That’s not funny.”
“I know….. I still can’t believe you had sex with that woman and you didn’t get frostbites.” He paused. “Or did you?”
“Sean.”
“Sorry.” He downed the last of his drink and collected the selection of ties. “I gotta go, but before that I wanna give you some brotherly advice.”
“What?”
“Go out and get some. If you wanna go check out the pick-up clubs sometimes, I can be your guide.”
“I bet you can, but no thanks.”