Fic: Genius x 2 (Criminal Minds / Numb3rs, Reid / Morgan, Charlie / Colby)
Title: Genius x 2
Fandom: Criminal Minds / Numb3rs
Pair: Spencer Reid / Derek Morgan,
Charlie Eppes / Colby Granger
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine, etc.
Feedback: Always Welcome
Criminal Minds Main List
Notes: Crossover with Numb3rs. Companion piece Sitter Duty is here.
Dedicated to Devon99. Thanks for inspiration.
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“Okay, I’m leaving now.” Reid grabbed his coat and his messenger bag. "Are you sure you don’t need me?”
“Prentiss and Rossi are working on consultation, I got paperwork, J.J.`s in weapon training, and the lecture is in the other end of the building. I think we’ll be just fine for few hours.” Hotch commented. “Go and have fun. Besides, he specifically asked for you.”
“Yeah, isn’t it great?” Reid beamed.
“Depends on the definition of great, I suppose.”
“He’s a genius in his own field, a former child prodigy-” Reid paused and gave Hotch a small smile. “Well, you understand why it’s an exciting thing for me, don’t you?”
“Yeah.” Hotch sat down behind his desk. “Enjoy it.”
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“Chocolate buns?”
“Garcia, I’ve told you not to call me that at work.” Morgan complained. He lifted his eyes from the pile of old case files in front of him to Garcia who was currently holding a wicker basket full of chocolate covered pastries. “Sorry, I thought you meant… Sorry.”
“That’s okay, honeybunny.” Garcia picked a bun and took a big bite. “GigagBrain still at that lecture?” She sat down in front of her keyboards.
“Still. It ended half an hour ago.”
“Maybe they had a lot to talk about.”
“Right….”
“And they got a lot in common.”
“And your source is…?” Morgan teased.
“Nothing stalker-ish, I just finished reading his book.” She pulled a paperback from her bag and handed it over to Morgan. “Look at the back cover, he’s pretty yummy.”
“If you like big noses and curls.” He gave her a sharp glance. “You got something to say?”
“Nope. But it must be nice for Yummybrain to deal with one of his own people.”
“His own people?”
“Think about it, MuscleWonder. That Eppes guy was a child genius, several doctorates, working for the bureau….. Sound like someone we know?”
“They’re not that similar.”
“Come on, he’s like a socially well adapt, Jewish version of our Little Doctor. And he’s gotta be pretty important too, if they send him a bodyguard from the LA office.”
“He’s got a bodyguard?”
“This big guy who’s following him. He was cute too.”
“When did you see him?”
“Well….”
“Mama, have you been fiddling with the security cameras again?”
“Just a little bit…. And he had a turtleneck. A really tight turtleneck.”
“So?”
“They just got in from outside, it’s pretty chilly. You know what happens to men’s nipples when it’s chilly.”
“You hacked into the security system to see men’s nipples poking under their shirts?”
“Yep.”
“You’re a twisted, wicked little cyberbitch.”
“And you love me like this.”
“Yeah.”
“Busy?” Reid poked his head into the Garcia’s bunker.
“Not really, did you just get back?”
“Yeah, Charlie’s flying back tomorrow morning, so I asked him to stay a while. You know, have some coffee and talk. We’ll be in the break room, if you need me.”
He was gone before Morgan had time to respond.
“Isn’t that nice?” Garcia giggled. “Like a little kid who just found a new buddy and runs to get his bucket and spade.”
“Penny.”
“Come on, you can’t be jealous for that. The guy’s gonna be gone tomorrow.”
“I’m not jealous. This time, I mean. It’s just weird.”
“What’s weird?”
“How often do you understand what Reid’s talking about?”
“Not often.”
“Exactly. It’s not like I’m the most inspiring company for a brainiac debate.”
“So what? You got other trump cards.”
“Let’s hear them, I could use some ego boosting.”
“You got…. Well, a nice butt.”
“Just nice?”
“Fine, you got the butt of young Baryshnikov.”
“I don’t like that comparison.”
“And you know how to handle your gun.”
“You mean real guns?”
“Listen….” Garcia piled up Morgan’s case files and shoved them to his lap. “Normally I would love to fluff your ego, along with other places, but I got my hands full with the database updates. I’ll write a dirty poem about your attributes, if you just leave me alone for a minute.”
“You’re kicking me out?”
“Yeah. If I don’t finish this, I’ll have to stay late and I got a movie night with Kevin.”
“What movie?”
“The porn version of Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.”
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Morgan tapped his fingers against his desk and eyed the three men in the break room.
Reid and doctor Eppes were sitting at the table, both babbling constantly, and waving their hands like two overactive preachers. Eppes`s security guy was leaning against the cupboard, his hands crossed over his chest. His eyes hadn’t left the two man at the table once during the time Morgan had been watching them.
“Has anyone told you that your eyes look like they’re about to dry totally and fall off your head?” Prentiss commented. “You have to blink now and then.”
“When did you get here?”
“Couple minutes ago.”
“How was the consultation?”
“Nothing interesting.”
“Where’s Rossi?”
“On the phone. He`s fighting with his ex-wife, something about alimonies.”
“Which wife?”
“Who cares? And back to the topic, how long have you been playing the guard dog here?”
“Not for long.”
“I got to admit, that fed is cute. And the doctor too, in a geeky way.”
“Thanks a lot. Not exactly what I wanna hear right now.”
“Morgan, they got that security fed or whatever he is watching them all the time. That’s more effective than a chastity belt.”
“You’re making fun of me, aren’t you?”
“Yeah.”
Morgan was about to throw back something spiky, when Eppes`s companion came out of the break room and marched across the bullpen like a living bulldozer. He grabbed Morgan by his arm and pulled him to the supply closet.
“What the hell are you doing, man?” Morgan tried to get out of his grasp, but the guy pinned him against the wall.
“I’m giving you a warning. I saw you looking at him, so don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about. You stay away from him or else.”
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“I mean I didn’t wanna start a fight in the middle of the office, but what was that guy thinking? That creep is a total maniac.” Morgan vented.
Garcia looked seriously frustrated.
“I have to get this done today, are you planning to keep ranting for long?”
“That loony acted like I was trying to make moves on that visiting Brainiac. Explain that to me!”
“If I give you a good explanation for that, will you leave me alone to finish this?”
“Yeah.” Morgan sighed. The long monologue was seriously taxing for lunges.
“Good.” Garcia snapped few keys and a personnel record appeared on one of the monitors. “I checked their records, just out of curiosity.”
“Get to the point.”
“Granger, Colby. He’s named as the primary emergency contact on all of Eppes`s records.”
“So?”
“They both have the same home address.”
“What else?”
“They have a joint custody of a six month old baby girl.”
“You mean….?”
“I mean jealousy is very contagious around here. He’s not after your genius, he has his own braniac . End of story. Now give me some peace, please.”
“Baby girl, I didn’t mean-”
“Just leave! Drag that yummy tush of yours away from here, or I’ll never finish this today.”
“Okay, okay, I’m going.” Morgan lifted his hands up in a sign of surrender and backed out of the bunker.
“Feds and doctors….” Garcia mumbled and focused on tapping her keyboard in a furious pace. “Hunky feds want pretty doctors and pretty doctors want hunky feds. What are we girls suppose to do?”
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“Are you done?” Reid was waiting in the hallway when Morgan emerged from Garcia’s lair.
“With the paperwork? Yep. Did your buddy leave already?”
“Actually, he asked if we want to go for dinner, all four of us. I said I would ask you.”
“Sure.”
“Are you sure?”
“Sure I’m sure.”
“Great.” Reid paused. “I gotta say I’m proud of you.”
“Why?”
“I saw you shooting daggers through the glass when we were in the break room, but you didn’t do or say anything.”
“You thought I would make a scene?”
“Something like that….”
“I’m never jealous.”
“Morgan….”
“Fine, sometimes, but I can control myself.”