A brief demonstration

[fionacat]

If you will indulge, what is the difference between these four pieces of writing

Comments

[terrycloth]

They've all got awkward puntuation and sentence structure issues... I think ii is technically correct but awkward, and iii reads best but still has a mistake or two?

(i) is obsessed with furriness and animal-ness?
(ii) is clearly something the author could see and was trying to describe, but it's a little confusing to read
(iii) and (iv) seem like they might be part of the same story?

My guess is you wrote iii?

[fionacat]

iii is about 6 years old, iv was made up today, 2 is from a story i never finished and 1 is from a story i wrote (unsurprisingly) for Loupy.