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for the longest time I had this image of what it would be like to see my father again. I would call him up, we would have an akward but heartfelt short conversation where we plan to meet up and have lunch. he would gush a bit about how he missed me and we would both admit that we were fools. the day would come for us to meet again and I would drive
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but you know, don't trick yourself into thinking that you "need" him in your life. because you don't.
sure, it would be a blessing, it would be nice... but it's not a necessity.
with age, it just becomes less there. for me, as i grow older, i realize that it's not my fault. it isn't me. that, and i can now pick and choose who i wish to include in my life. and it is refreshingly powerful to know this.
blood is not always thicker than water.
i do wish for him that he comes to his senses and realized what he's missing out on.
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