can you even hear me?

[fire_coal]

Remember how I said I shouldn't bottle anything up, as it only leads to bad things? -- And then how I sunk back and smoothly sipped my hypocrisy as I bottled up that thing for over 3 years? Maybe you don't. Maybe you do Matthew, dearest Matthew. Man I treat you like shit sometimes. Why is it that I can only tell you things? That I can only confide

Comments

[thirteenspikes]

I hate myself a lot of the time too, probably we all do. I am NOT a good friend. At one point in my life my then-best male friend got on his knees in front of me and begged for a knife and I ignored him while I lay on a hotel bed and let another guy play with me, honestly not caring. It's something I'm never going to forget about - it's not something I should ever forget about - that night was my rock bottom. So far

Nice post.

[chevaliermalfet]

Way to go catharsis. Being a little rough and unfair with yourself is necessary and releiving sometimes aimee, just be careful it doesnt dominate your thinking.

I doubt anyone will reject you or criticize you for the content of this post, just as I doubt you even considered other peoples reactions when writing it. Just take comfort in the fact that everyone you will ever meet has pain, trauma, and neuroses as part of their daily bread, so they're often just as fucked as you, or so close as to make no difference. And also remember that as bad a person as you think you are, there's also always someone worse. Stay away from the pipe bombs, and you've got my support!

[nota1trickpony]

i dont even know what to say
and hopefully you don't take this the wrong way but i really ENJOYED that entry.
i love how you seem to have such an easy time articulating whats happening around you