"I got memories, I got shit. So much it don't show..."

[firestarter713]

Oh man, I don't know what's wrong with me. I think my mood changes each time I take a breath. The problem is that I have these extreme highs and lows. On the rare occasion that I'm just feeling in-between-ish, it's pure misery anyway. Mediocrity is the bane of my existence. I've been meaning to update all day, but kept changing my mind about what I

Comments

[tinkerbell309]

Wow I honestly never thought you of all people would feel this way. I mean, I do know how you've been feeling, but not to this measure. I often feel the same way:

I really don't wanna be the person you're only friends with when they're around. I couldn't have said it any better.

I want you to know when you feel this way, you CAN reach out to someone for reassurance. Hello, I'm right here! A phone call way, a drive way....I'm always here for you. And I've been thinking lately, we need to do something. I can count my friends on one hand, and I can also count how many I see often. One. But he's also my fiance. I want you to be my other best friend I see. Not just every two weeks or whatever.

This is turning out to be a long comment. :) Just do me this favor and don't hide the way you feel. Don't pretend to be happy when you're not. If you need someone, there are people you can turn to. And I'm one of them. Love always.

[firestarter713]

I can't stress enough how much I love you. You always say the most perfect things, and the best part is that I know that they're sincere. Yunno, I was thinking about you when I wrote this, because you're one of the few people I know, without a doubt, that I can count on. No matter what's going on with you or how busy you are, you never forget me and I can't tell you how much that means to me. Knowing that I always have a place in your heart is so comforting, and it makes me feel like maybe there is a place for me in this crazy, mixed-up world

[tinkerbell309]

Yes, that's exactly what I mean: in high school we saw eachother everyday and had so many good times. Now, it's totally different. We need to set up some sort of schedule, something. I know we can. I'm glad that you know you can count on me. I would not pretend to care, I never have, and I always will. I'll never find a friend like you again.

This weekend for will be busy for me as well. ;( Hey-- that's what we should do! Phone calls. Set up a time?

I'm still your best friend? In the whole world?! Wow! hehe...I love hearing that. :)

P.S. Yay me for the line. ;p

[firestarter713]

Of course you are!!! But I gotta tell ya lady, you're crazy for being so shocked! ;P

And I definitely think something can be worked out. Friday I gotta go to the Everglades for a fieldtrip from 1:00 to 4:00pm (MOSQUITOS!!), and I have TWO TESTS on Tuesday to study for (shoot me now). Other than that, whenever you're not busy's fine with me. :)

[xblack_eyedx]

Being your sister, you would think I'd hate you by now. Living under the same roof for 16 years I can honestly say that if you were never born, I don't even know where I'd be. I'd give my life for you Steph, and I can't say that for anyone else in this world. I know that you've helped guide me through life to be the person I am now, you've made one of the biggest impacts on my life. Even when you think I "hate you" because I don't like to cuddle you, the truth is I love you to peices, and I hope you know that no matter what I'll always be right behind you. Even when you grow up, move into your own place and get married I'll only be a phone call away. You'll always be able to reach out and touch me, no matter how many miles we have between us, because you truly mean the world to me. I love you Stephy. :)

[firestarter713]

I'm so touched--- in all the right places! Hahah! I still got it! :P

Anyway, I'll talk to you later! ;)

[xblack_eyedx]

Hahaha, okay, and don't cry! lol

Re: Short Comment because I'm Sick...Actually It's Rather Long Now

[firestarter713]

Well, of course I'm happy now! It's so sweet of you to say that you think I'm gonna end up as part of a happy couple-- I secretly hope you're right. ;) But I think that the only person that's ever a secret to is me, cus sometimes I don't know what the hell I think or want or should think or want. I feel exactly the same as you, though. But I think you should direct some of that optimism towards your own future cus, cmon, an awesome girl like you will eventually find someone equally awesome-- it's just that that's a rare thing. *smooches*

PS> You're sick?! I hope you feel better! :(

[meanstotheend]

...i wrestled a lot with what i should say, what i want to say, and what i need to say. no matter how i looked at it, it came out the same...i love you...its not the only thing that needs to be said, but its the most important...

[firestarter713]

...Thank you. That really means a lot to me, you have no idea... mostly because I love you so much. :)

[meanstotheend]

*sigh* ps...*whispers* i love you more though...

[firestarter713]

Poppycock! *bursts into giggles* :P