My lameness knows no bounds
Oh yes. Rascal Flatts and I will now take you on a journey through the many ups and downs of Giles and Buffy's relationship through the years. Obviously a super cheesy album cover of poor quality was needed for this journey.
Season 1
There was much amused perplexity!
LOOK HOW EXCITED HE IS TO HAVE FINALLY MET HIS SLAYER!
She thought he was weird.
The season was not without its tension-filled-close-proximity moments. In fact, I think that moment in the hall where he puts his arm out to stop her and then leans in all predatory-like is why I started shipping them. Completely shallow reason, but it's true. Once their emotional bond grew, I started to ship them for realsies, but we'll get to that for the season 2 part.
Anyway, they were so innocent! So noble! And Giles was head over heels in love with his slayer. At this point it was purely platonic love though. He tried and tried and tried to keep his distance, but he couldn't. He tried to be the boss, but she took control, and he let her because he knew she was capable. She would tease him, he would blush. She was the brawn, he was the brains. Together they became a well-oiled demon fighting machine. She'd be in trouble, he'd come to her rescue (well... sort of. More like he created a distraction while Buffy kicked some bad dude's ass. But he did save her from Amy's mother, and she called him a god, and he mansqueed on the inside). Even at this point in their relationship, her approval meant everything to him. She quickly became his ENTIRE life. For Buffy, she put up a front that Giles was just that weird old English guy who insisted on monopolizing her time with training, but in reality, his approval meant everything to her. He made her feel special.
So, how does Rascal Flatts fit into all of this? Well...
The Day Before You
Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you
In your eyes I see forever
Makes me wish that my life never knew
The day before you
Waiting All My Life
I was tired of waiting
Every night was praying
Everyday would be the day I'd find you
I grew so impatient, how long would it take
To know you were out there somewhere
Somewhere waiting, wondering just like me
Season 2
The season of discovery and understanding. This is when their bond was really solidified and they both realized that despite their many differences, they were one in the same.
There was angst and attempts from Giles to shut Buffy out, but Buffy never gave up on him.
There were late night workout sessions and loving mockery of each other's taste in music.
But most of all, they saved each other from themselves.
There was no judging, just acceptance and somehow saying the exact thing that the other needed to hear. They realized this season that as long as they had each other, they would never be alone.
Every Day - This song is Buffy/Giles completely. There is no other song by anyone that fits them as well as this one does. I'm convinced it was written about them. Not really, but it should have been.
You could've bowed out gracefully
But you didn't
You knew enough to know
To leave well enough alone
But you wouldn't
I drive myself crazy
Tryin' to stay out of my own way
The messes that I make
But my secrets are so safe
The only one who gets me
Yeah, you get me
It's amazing to me
How every day
Every day, every day
You save my life
That could be from either Giles' or Buffy's POV. This song works for just about all of the seasons, but I think season 2 really holds most of its sentiment. They were just there for each other through everything and they understood each other when no one else could.
Shine On
Lord knows that I'm not perfect but I sure do try
And I see the man that I can be in your eyes
Well there are times I still get lost in yesterday
But you put the past behind me and you light my way
Season 3
The season that I personally believe was the one where Giles realized he was kind of maybe really in love with Buffy. Their relationship is so ambiguous that neither Giles nor Buffy really know how they feel about each other, but I think that when Travers defined it as father/daughter, Giles started to really evaluate how he felt about her, and by The Prom he realized it wasn't exactly father/daughter. He didn't want to be her father. He wasn't sure what he wanted to be, he just knew that what he felt was more than any single definition of love. She was his entire life and he had finally embraced that fact. He knew that he would forever want to be by her side, in whatever capacity that she would accept him.
This was another instance of Giles not judging Buffy and being exactly what she needed him to be. He was worried out of his mind when she was gone, he was completely LOST when she was gone, he was angry and hurt and you know he just wanted to strangle her, but all he says is "Welcome home, Buffy." He holds it all in and is just so relieved and HAPPY that she's back, and she knows none of this. She has NO IDEA about how much she means to him, he just... forgives her. It takes her concealing Angel's return for him to finally let out his frustration with her, but even then, he holds back. They had their ups and downs in this season, she betrayed his trust, he betrayed hers, but they always forgave each other in the end because they can't live without each other.
And Giles totally wanted to dance with Buffy so that he could have an excuse to hold her in his arms and drink in her scent. You know it's true.
See Me Through
I know sometimes I let you down
But I'm still getting used to having you around
And if I ever make you cry
There's nothing I won't do to make things right
I'm not perfect and that's for sure
A little time is all I'm asking for
My Wish - I just feel like these are some of the thoughts running through his head during the prom, especially when she was receiving her little umbrella thing. No one's sure what's going to happen during/after graduation, but all he wants is her happiness, and he's willing to let her go if he has to, but he doesn't want to. This could fit season 4, too. Or 6.
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.
Where You Are
There you are standing strong,
I'm a leaf holding on
You believe like a child,
In this fire runnin' wild
Oh I love how you see
Right to the heart of me
Season 4
Separation anxiety, abandonment issues, identity crises, you name it, Giles suffered from it. He fought with himself to let her go, and once he sent her on her way, he just couldn't. He had to be a part of her life, but unfortunately, Buffy had finally listened to him and started being more independent, to the point where she basically forgot about him. He was devastated and eventually came to the ridiculous conclusion that he had no place in Sunnydale anymore. *siiiiigh* Giles, Giles, Giles. He was so insecure in this season, and he placed so much of his self-worth on Buffy's acceptance of him that it just crushed him when she started shutting him out of her life. She was his purpose, his entire life, and she didn't need him anymore. *sniff* But she did, he was just too idiotic to realize it. Idiotic, but absolutely adorable. All of his angsting over Buffy totally rocked my world.
Holes
Holes in and around me I keep falling back into
Holes dig in and surround me
God knows what I'm gonna do
To fill in these holes left by you
I'm Moving On - What Giles so desperately tried to do, and almost did
I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long
I'm movin' on
Season 5
Oooooh, season 5. THEY WERE SO CLOSE! SO LOVING! SO COMMUNICATIVE... SORT OF! This is really the only season where I would mention the word fluffy in reference to Buffy/Giles, but even at their fluffiest they experience many moments of angst. They just... guh, they are so darn beautiful. They were so grown up and coupley in this season. Buffy confided in him for everything. He wasn't afraid to tell her that she had to kill her sister, even though he knew she'd vehemently refuse. He saved her from losing herself after her mother died. She made him feel important again. He unconsciously became her makeshift boyfriend after Riley left. Ooooh, they were so beautiful in this season. So, so beautiful.
You
Every time I get lost
In a temperamental mood
You still stay cool
Just when I think that this
Life's about to drive me insane
You take the reins
Every time I feel I'm drifting
Off course
You're my compass, you're
My one true north
Here
There's a place I've been looking for
That took me in and out of buildings
Behind windows, walls and doors
And I thought I found it
Couple times, even settled down
And I'd hang around just long enough
To find my way back out
I know now the place that I was trying to
Reach
Was you, right here in front of me
This is more of a "Man, I wish it had turned out like this" song. During season 5, I could easily see a scenario like this happening had they not been distracted by so many other things and if something had finally clicked in Buffy's head to make her see Giles the man rather than Giles the Watcher. I'm still of the belief that Giles was in love with Buffy through the entirety of seasons 4 through 6 (and most of 7), and season 5 was when he just accepted that she wouldn't see him as anything other than what she's always seen him. Which leads us to...
Words I Couldn't Say
What do I do now that you're gone
No back up plan no second chance
And no one else to blame
All I can hear in the silence that remains
Are the words I couldn't say
This is more post season 5, but not exactly season 6, so it's going here.
Season 6
The season where it all went downhill... again. Giles was lost without Buffy, and so he left Sunnydale because the presence of her memory was too strong and he thought that without her he had no place there anymore. When Buffy was resurrected, all she wanted was Giles, and he wasn't there. But then he was, and he held back so much that she felt like he didn't want her back, and she shut him out just like she did to everyone else. HEARTBREAK! Giles was so excited about having a heart-felt reunion with her, and then she just shut it down. And continued to ignore his attempts at both physical and emotional connection. She took advantage of his inability to say "no" to her. It hurt him. And he wasn't strong enough to stay around and watch her hurting while he couldn't do anything about it, and so he left. He abandoned her. He did it because he thought it was what she needed, but had he pushed harder to talk with Buffy, had he tried harder to resist helping her when she could have done something herself, the entire mess that came out of season 6 could have been completely avoided. Or at least somewhat avoided. But he left, abandoned them all, and without Giles, Buffy finally lost the little determination that she had to keep on living and she just crumbled and started doing things *coughSpikecough* that she knew were bad for her. The one person who loved her who she thought would never leave her left her. When she has nothing, she's supposed to have Giles, but he just took that away from her, didn't he? *sigh* And it killed Giles to be away from her. You know it did. The fact that amongst all the chaos going on in Grave he instantly notices Buffy's haircut pretty much tells me that he spent day after day picturing every little detail about her in his head and her memory just lingered on for him. He couldn't completely let go, just as he couldn't completely let go of her after she died.
Pieces
From the moment that we met
My world was turned around
Upside down
To some degree I still regret
My memory for keeping you around
What Hurts the Most (this song also goes with season 7. I couldn't decide which one to put it with, so consider it going with both of them)
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do
OOOOH, THE ANGST! THE HEARTBREAK! Season 6 is tragic.
Season 7
*siiiiigh* The season of irreparable damage and horrid turtleneck sweaters. Giles shut Buffy out when she was trying to reconnect with him, and she was hurt. Giles betrays her trust in order to perpetuate the attempt at killing Spike, and Buffy is hurt beyond words. Not only did he betray her trust (which he had vowed in season 3 to never do again), but he showed her that he didn't trust her as a leader, and if I'm honest, I think this is what hurt her the most, but she never communicated this to Giles, she just shut him out. He made her feel alone again right when she was starting to believe that they were on their way to getting back what they once had. He crushed her, so she crushed him back. Made him feel useless, completely disrespected him and all that he had done for her over the years, refused to see where he was coming from, refused to let him explain himself, she just... cut him out of her life and made some seriously stupid decisions purely out of spite for Giles. And Giles just wanted to get her love and trust back, and just when she'd relent the tiniest bit, Giles would say the wrong thing and she'd retreat back into her protective shell. She cut out the one person who was willing to share her burden with her, and it almost destroyed them all. And they only made up for the sake of saving the world. No one really talked anything out. The damage was done, and it'll take a whole hell of a lot to repair it (and... judging by what I've read of the season 8 comics, they just get worse with this whole shutting each other out thing). Oh, these two. They started out with so much promise, so much innocence, so much effortless love, and now... all they do is hurt each other. OH, MY HEART! MY POOR, POOR HEART!
To Make Her Love Me
I've said some things I shouldn't have
Tried everything to win her back
I'm human, I messed up, Is she gone?, Are we done?
Forgiveness, another chance, that's all I want, it's in your hands
Here Comes Goodbye (erm... okay, I just really love this song, nothing but the chorus really fits Buffy/Giles, but that's good enough for me)
Here comes goodbye, here comes the last time
Here comes the start of every sleepless night
The first of every tear I’m gonna cry
Here comes the pain, Here comes me wishing things would never change
And she was right here in my arms tonight, but here comes goodbye
And this concludes our musical journey through the epic tragedy that is Buffy/Giles.