Courtship Vs. Marriage

[fishnamedkittie]

Today I was intrigued by some conversation and decided to research Courtship vs. Dating.... lol some of the research irritated me and some inspired me

Comments

Another interesting thing i read

[fishnamedkittie]

"Boundaries are so hard to live by because the commitment in dating is so ill-defined. Are you really going to get married? The only way to be sure is to sign the papers! And so, we allow some of these priviledges because we're pretty sure we'll get married. But then something comes up, and we decide it wasn't meant to be. You've just had a mini-marriage and divorce! You've given yourself -- heart, and body (in various degrees) to a person who is not your spouse -- if you were married, that would be adultery, but because you're single, it's okay?!?"

hmmm

[jxm]

I disagree with most of those things in the end of your entry. The way i see a relationship is that it preps you for marriage. It's like training for the real big relationship that you will have for the rest of your life. I think that such high divorce rates are due to people not knowing what a serious relationship is about because they 'screwed' around so much and find it so hard to be with someone for so long. Thats just my take from it. Then again i won't get involved in a relationship or anything besides a friendship unless its going to be serious, which i find rare to find in many young adults.

Jay-eM

[fishnamedkittie]

Hey I agree, i most of that crap makes no sense, i just found it intriguing. I think dating is to find some one suitable for marriage and it preps you for it.

I almost agree that it is almost a mini marriage just not that extreme. lol Instead of preping you for divorce, i see it as helping you weed out the ones you'd end up divorced too lol.

[chrisplaysdrums]

i concur with (it) teaches people to break off difficult relationships, conditioning them more for divorce than marriage, though you are also right that it is more of a weeding out process and discovering what type of person you want to be with. like water purification.

[spankster182]

i dont agree with that, i dont find anything wrong with breaking up with a bad boyfriend/girlfriend or getting out of a bad dating relationship, but i still hold marriage in the highest regard and view it as an unbreakable bond. that's why there's a difference between dating and marriage

[spankster182]

but i do agree that there is a difference between courtship and dating. i see courtship as preparing for the future together and dating as seeing if there might be a future together. and i dont necessarily think that you have to "date" before you "court" either, although it seems like nowadays that is always the way it happens. i've found it totally possible to go from a friendship to a serious relationship, skipping all of the BS of going out on dates and "getting to know each other", etc. i agree that some forms of dating can be bad or even harmful but its all relative to how mature you are and how well you handle it.

my fave of the entire list was "creates an appetite for variety and change" which i think is SO TRUE, back in the day when i was more or less pro courtship, anti dating i was always really happy with whoever i was with and wasn't really interested in trying other things out. nowadays i think i would be the happiest person alive if i could try one of each!!

[chrisplaysdrums]

slut

lol jk

[spankster182]

haaa you're only young once

and if by slutty you mean virgin... then yes! i am!

[fishnamedkittie]

oh and Manda: You're so right! live it up! WOOT lol

[foggyknight]

The main thing I got out of the books was there are certain circumstances in which dating is inappropriate and certain 'rough' guidelines we should follow before we decide to date. One is that people tend to rely more on themselves nowadays to find a mate rather than god. That we tend to look for answers in what science has found rather than in God