for Tegan
I wrote this on my mobile on the train on the same day... traveling from seeing Silverblue and Chaos and Tegan, to Midsummer. Given a few of the things I'd been talking about with Chaos, the dedication seemed very appropraite.
It's hot and unbearably still. I'm tired but content, just cruisin through the most heart warming of long long days.
Home just for the briefest, and then back on the train. This time heading north, for my second reminder of family for the day. I've literally just stepped on the train when he sees me...he's on the far side of fifty, I'd say. And while he already has a complexion inclined to beet-red, I have a feeling that sunburnt look owes a far bit to the booze...
We're standing in the doorway still, him a little to closely. Me a bit guarded, vague, but friendly.
His questions have a tic to them, like he can't remember my answers (or that he's asked them to begin with..?)
You smoke? Yeah it's a bad habit. Should be made illegal hey? Hot isn't it? You had a good day? You meet some nice people on trains hey?
And he's standing a little too closely still, and I can feel his eyes crawling. But at least right at the beginning, he asked - You mind chatting to me?
And despite the slight intrusion, and despite the gentle come on (You should give me your number? I have a place in the country. You could come and visit sometime)
You know what? I really don't mind chatting. And I'm a big girl, in a lot of senses, and I know I can hold my own...So I certainly don't feel threatened (and I'm sure he can sense that, I'm sure that they all can, every time I'm 'here' again)
So no, the chat I don't mind, though I was polite enough to warn him
... My stop's at north melbourne...
And he was just another small moment of connection. And another small reminder...
...though I might not want to escape to his house in the country, sometimes my light shines very very brightly
And I can take those reminders and smile. Wishing him a pleasant evening, and let this small intrusion become a small ember, adding to the glow that's already in my heart today.
It's hot and unbearably still. I'm tired but content, just cruisin through the most heart warming of long long days.
Home just for the briefest, and then back on the train. This time heading north, for my second reminder of family for the day. I've literally just stepped on the train when he sees me...he's on the far side of fifty, I'd say. And while he already has a complexion inclined to beet-red, I have a feeling that sunburnt look owes a far bit to the booze...
We're standing in the doorway still, him a little to closely. Me a bit guarded, vague, but friendly.
His questions have a tic to them, like he can't remember my answers (or that he's asked them to begin with..?)
You smoke? Yeah it's a bad habit. Should be made illegal hey? Hot isn't it? You had a good day? You meet some nice people on trains hey?
And he's standing a little too closely still, and I can feel his eyes crawling. But at least right at the beginning, he asked - You mind chatting to me?
And despite the slight intrusion, and despite the gentle come on (You should give me your number? I have a place in the country. You could come and visit sometime)
You know what? I really don't mind chatting. And I'm a big girl, in a lot of senses, and I know I can hold my own...So I certainly don't feel threatened (and I'm sure he can sense that, I'm sure that they all can, every time I'm 'here' again)
So no, the chat I don't mind, though I was polite enough to warn him
... My stop's at north melbourne...
And he was just another small moment of connection. And another small reminder...
...though I might not want to escape to his house in the country, sometimes my light shines very very brightly
And I can take those reminders and smile. Wishing him a pleasant evening, and let this small intrusion become a small ember, adding to the glow that's already in my heart today.