A Message From Home
Demons have rhythm, it's a well known fact. Crowley had loaded a lovely album entitled Licensed to Ill into his top of the line sound system and was puttering around the shop, enjoying some sort of a ballad...until something went terrbly wrong, not unlike an electric guitar breaking into Handel's Messiah.
Now here's a little story - I've got to tell
About three bad brothers - you know so well
It started way back in history
With Adrock, M.C.A., and me - Mike D.
Been had a little horsy named Paul Revere
Just me and my horsy and a quart of beer
Riding across the land - kicking up sand
Sheriff's posse on my tail cause I'm in demand
One lonely Beastie I be
All by myself - without nobody
The sun is beating down on my baseball hat
The air is gettin' hot - the beer is getting flat
Lookin' for a girl - I ran into a guy
His name is M.C.A., I said, "Howdy" - he said, CROWLEY--
He told a little story - that sounded well rehearsed
WE UNDERSTAND YOUR NEW LOCATION PRESENTS CHALLENGES--
The brew was in my hand - and he was on my tip
His voice was hoarse, his throat was dry - he asked me for
a sip
He said, YOU ARE RECALLED
I said, THERE IS NO ARGUMENT
Had a chance to run
He pulled out his shotgun
He was quick on the draw - I thought I'd be dead
He put the gun to my head and this is what he said,
WE HAVE EXERCISED THE MERCY OF HELL IN REGARD TO THE ADVERSARY
I think you know what time it is - it's time to get ill
Now what do we have here - an outlaw and his beer
I run this land, you understand - I make myself clear."
We stepped into the wind - he had a gun, I had a grin
BUT YOUR ALLIANCE WITH THE ANGEL IS OF CONCERN
"Now I got the gun - you got the brew
You got two choices of what you can do
It's not a tough decision as you can see
YOU WILL RETURN IMMEDIATELY, OR AGENTS WILL BE SENT FOR YOU I said,
I'll ride with you if you can get me to the border
The sheriff's after me for what I did to his daughter
I did it like this - I did it like that
YOU WILL NOT PULL ANY STUNTS LIKE LAST TIME
So I'm on the run - the cop's got my gun
And right about now - it's time to have some fun
The King Adrock - that is my name
And I know the fly spot where they got the champagne."
We rode for six hours the we hit the spot
The beat was a bumping and the girlies was hot
This dude was staring like he knows who we are
We took the empty spot next to him at the bar
M.C.A. said, "Yo, you know this kid?"
I said, "I didn't." - but I know he did
The kid said, "WE AWAIT YOUR ARRIVAL.
CROWLEY, DO NOT DISAPPOINT US AGAIN."
Pulled out the jammy - aimed it at the sky
He yelled, "Stick 'em up!" - and let two fly
Hands went up and people hit the floor
He wasted two kids that ran for the door
"I'm Mike D. and I get respect
Your cash and your jewelry is what I expect"
M.C.A. was with it and he's my ace
So I grabbed the piano player and I punched him in the face
The piano player's out - the music stopped
His boy had beef - and he got dropped
Mike D. grabbed the money - M.C.A. snatched the gold
I grabbed two girlies and a beer that's cold.
As the beat faded away, Crowley stared at the speaker, lip twitching.
Now here's a little story - I've got to tell
About three bad brothers - you know so well
It started way back in history
With Adrock, M.C.A., and me - Mike D.
Been had a little horsy named Paul Revere
Just me and my horsy and a quart of beer
Riding across the land - kicking up sand
Sheriff's posse on my tail cause I'm in demand
One lonely Beastie I be
All by myself - without nobody
The sun is beating down on my baseball hat
The air is gettin' hot - the beer is getting flat
Lookin' for a girl - I ran into a guy
His name is M.C.A., I said, "Howdy" - he said, CROWLEY--
He told a little story - that sounded well rehearsed
WE UNDERSTAND YOUR NEW LOCATION PRESENTS CHALLENGES--
The brew was in my hand - and he was on my tip
His voice was hoarse, his throat was dry - he asked me for
a sip
He said, YOU ARE RECALLED
I said, THERE IS NO ARGUMENT
Had a chance to run
He pulled out his shotgun
He was quick on the draw - I thought I'd be dead
He put the gun to my head and this is what he said,
WE HAVE EXERCISED THE MERCY OF HELL IN REGARD TO THE ADVERSARY
I think you know what time it is - it's time to get ill
Now what do we have here - an outlaw and his beer
I run this land, you understand - I make myself clear."
We stepped into the wind - he had a gun, I had a grin
BUT YOUR ALLIANCE WITH THE ANGEL IS OF CONCERN
"Now I got the gun - you got the brew
You got two choices of what you can do
It's not a tough decision as you can see
YOU WILL RETURN IMMEDIATELY, OR AGENTS WILL BE SENT FOR YOU I said,
I'll ride with you if you can get me to the border
The sheriff's after me for what I did to his daughter
I did it like this - I did it like that
YOU WILL NOT PULL ANY STUNTS LIKE LAST TIME
So I'm on the run - the cop's got my gun
And right about now - it's time to have some fun
The King Adrock - that is my name
And I know the fly spot where they got the champagne."
We rode for six hours the we hit the spot
The beat was a bumping and the girlies was hot
This dude was staring like he knows who we are
We took the empty spot next to him at the bar
M.C.A. said, "Yo, you know this kid?"
I said, "I didn't." - but I know he did
The kid said, "WE AWAIT YOUR ARRIVAL.
CROWLEY, DO NOT DISAPPOINT US AGAIN."
Pulled out the jammy - aimed it at the sky
He yelled, "Stick 'em up!" - and let two fly
Hands went up and people hit the floor
He wasted two kids that ran for the door
"I'm Mike D. and I get respect
Your cash and your jewelry is what I expect"
M.C.A. was with it and he's my ace
So I grabbed the piano player and I punched him in the face
The piano player's out - the music stopped
His boy had beef - and he got dropped
Mike D. grabbed the money - M.C.A. snatched the gold
I grabbed two girlies and a beer that's cold.
As the beat faded away, Crowley stared at the speaker, lip twitching.