in a downward spiril...

[flipboi17]

my life is spiriling downward. it's funny cause i'm sitting outside myself watching as my life, my body, my mind slip away. am i slipping away from reality? i don't know. i don't know what's real and what's fake. i don't know i don't know i don't know anymore...who am i? have i grown up? have i stayed the same? did my mind take a giant step back to

Comments

part 1

[troglodyte1]

Holy shit that was long! Erika, you can't do that to me...I'm a slow reader! Anyways. Where do I begin? The t.v./movie thing...I do the same thing. Watch the same shit over and over, wishing I was apart of that. Or sometimes just having a good time watching someone elses life other than living my own. But I think you might be getting confused on whats real and whats not. Some of the t.v. shows and movies they have now a days can be realative to this world and the people in it, but overall...it's fake. The t.v. shows and movies are totally fake. It's when you turn off the t.v. that you enter reality. And though the reality of this world and this life may totally suck at times (or in some cases most of the time)...it's real. And you can't just sit at home and hide from it all day by watching t.v. It's not good for you. It's fun at times, but not all the time. You say that you're 18 and you've already expierenced so much that you're not sure whats left to expierence. You've been through a lot...A LOT...but you haven't

part 2

[troglodyte1]

Ok, so one more thing before I go. As for your lonliness and wanting a girlfriend...I totally feel ya. I get lonely at times. And sleeping with my goofy doll just isn't cuttin it these days. I want someone to cuddle with. I want a girl. I want love. But I'm never going to find it by looking for it. And niether are you. It's hard because sometimes we go to the club and I tell myself, "ok, I'm not going to look for anyone, I'm not going to expect anything...I'm just going to go, dance, and have fun with my friends." But no matter how much I tell myself that...hello! I have eyes! It's hard. But you know what? The one time I actually didn't "hunt" for a girl is the one time I actually danced with a girl and gave her my number. So, what am I trying to say? I don't know. I'm rambling. But I think what I'm trying to say is be patient because love will come to you eventually. It may not be today, tomorrow, or next week, but it will find you. And you will find it. I believe there is someone out there for everyone.

[ladybelmont]

erika ..erika erika.. tisk tisk. i luv yah. kit, if you can remember me.we care about u.