Fic: ... And the Battle Began (Chapter Two)

[flister]

Title: ... And the Battle Began
Chapter: ... And the Battle Began (Chapter Two)
Pairing: Naomi, Katie, Emily (but not in that way!)
Rating: R
Word Count: 10,000
Summary: AU - Although, really, Katie is potentially dangerous in any capacity - her ability to either infuriate Naomi to the point where she's seething or to make her smile in a way that makes Naomi want to giggle like the school-girl she is are two forms of ridiculous that Naomi has no idea how to handle.
A/N: AU. Sort of a pairing but - well. Wait and see... Big thanks as per to twistomatic for betaing, encouragement and this awesome icon. And to thecon12 for reminding me that Naomi likes sports with balls in them...

Am I crazy because I want to touch your skin? // Is it ludicrous that I have nothing to believe in?

Naomi's excellent at being a recluse. People drive her to it, she tells herself. They force it upon her, this need to be alone, to wallow in herself, because if she associates with anyone at all it just leads her right back here anyway.

Her mum tries a little to get her out of the house but, really, Naomi has nowhere to go and no one to see, so, soon enough her mum stops bothering and Naomi can't figure out if she's more pissed off with her for trying or stopping trying.

(She convinces herself that she likes it, being this way. It's just easier than acknowledging the loneliness.)

Even after all of her coursework has been done (and pictures of girls turn into those of cats or fruit or any-fucking-thing other) she finds things to work on, reasons to be alone.

Like reading, which she considers to be a part of her education anyway, and stripping her dresser bare and painting it again. She even manages to block out the noise from the rest of the house in a way that she's never been able to before, and it becomes a soothing busyness that distracts her from what's going on inside her own head.

Because she hasn't found a way to shake it all away just yet, all that stuff that happened at the party, and she finds that it creeps up on her at the most inconvenient of times. In the shower is the worst though, when she closes her eyes and soaps all of her skin, and then the thought is there, completely out of nowhere, and in her mind she's kissing Katie again.

She turns the hot water all the way down, then, and waits for it to turn cold so that the memory is lost to her and she's focussing on the way goosebumps appear on her skin until it becomes too unbearable and she has to get out.

And as the days count down and the return to school looms ever closer Naomi can only hope that it all becomes a distant memory and that she can remember that it was just a trivial thing, just a game, before she has to see Katie again.

Katie or Emily.

More than anything, though, Naomi hopes that Katie has forgotten all about it. Just like Naomi should have done but can't.

****

On the first day back, before it really begins, Naomi wakes up feeling surprisingly calm, like everything she's been worrying about is completely irrelevant to her life.

They won't be thinking about it, she reckons as she cleans her teeth, staring herself down. They've all had better things to do.

It's better after that, the cycle to school giving her the time to properly collect herself before she gets there, before she walks into the assembly hall and takes a seat close to the back without bothering to find any of her friends, or acquaintances as they are now, and partially listens as the head of year talks about knuckling down and settling in for the year. Naomi doesn't need to listen that closely. After all, it's everyone else who's easily distracted, not her.

She doesn't see the twins all day, which is a relief, and when she gets her timetable she finds that she doesn't have Art until Tuesday and Graphics until Wednesday. So she has a whole day to prepare herself for whatever looks they decide to shoot her tomorrow and she takes the time to reacquaint herself with the school (like she ever really forgot it) and takes her sandwiches back round to the D&T block where she used to sit when she first arrived.

It's nice, the quiet. And she's got her mini-disc player on, merrily playing some Creedence Clearwater Revival (which, one night, she had to concede she actually enjoyed when someone had played it in the lounge as she'd been making tea) and flipping through her new diary, when she catches a flash of red in front of her.

In contrast to other times, this time Naomi knows that it's Emily. She's leaning against a lamp-post, looking back at the green, her hand poised in her bag like she's waiting for the coast to be clear before she takes whatever it is out.

Emily hasn't seen her yet, Naomi thinks, and she considers legging it before she does but then resolves that, no, actually, it would be okay if Emily noticed her. If, maybe, Emily came over and said, "Hi, how was your summer?" or "So, that was a bit weird at that party - I was a bit fucking drunk," and then maybe they could put it behind them and get the fuck on with things.

But Emily doesn't see her and, instead, pulls her phone out of her bag and pushes some buttons, a grin slowly creeping across her face.

It only lasts for a moment, though, the smile, because Emily's quickly snapping her head up in the direction of the main building and dropping the phone back into her bag, her head down and feet carrying her away from the post and Naomi and the D&T block.

Naomi blinks, shakes her head, and looks back towards her timetable again, eyes drifting to the blocks that say Art, and wonders if she's missed an opportunity to make things right.

Of course, she knows, that would involve Emily still thinking there was something wrong anyway.

****

As per, the twins roll in just before the bell goes and take their seats in front of Naomi with only Emily acknowledging her with a small smile.

Naomi realises she's been holding her breath and releases it quietly as they turn away from her and settle in.

They don't turn around for the whole lesson, which Naomi spends mostly stealing glances up from her sketches to watch as their arms move against their own paper. She's noticing the muscles tighten and release at the back of Emily's biceps when the bell sounds for the end of class and Naomi realises that she's only managed to draw a vague outline of a hand, and not even a very good one.

She's swearing into her pencil, biting down on it so that her teeth leave indents where they've pressed too hard, when she hears a quiet, "Bye, Naomi."

She looks up in time to catch another one of those smiles from Emily, the ones that look sort of like Sorry, before she dips her head under her fringe and follows Katie out of the classroom.

Naomi stares after them both, watching as Katie sways her hips as per and Emily shuffles along behind her, and she wonders consciously, probably for the first time, just how that happened.

It occupies her thoughts for the next day as she sits through Science and debates whether or not it's against her beliefs to dissect an already-dead frog and only is appeased when her teacher explains that all the frogs died of natural causes so she needn't worry.

(Naomi isn't sure if it is true, but, really, she doesn't feel like drawing attention to herself in this class where there are about ten people in it who are more intelligent than she is, so it's better just to crack on with it for now.)

And she's half-concentrating on the poor little bastard, which she names Freddie for alliterative purposes, but her mind's still drifting now and again to the twins and she thinks about how Katie must have just always been like this and it must have caused Emily to react accordingly. But it was still strange to her, that they could have grown from the same place and come out so differently.

Naomi wonders, as she's noting down that she's located Freddie's smooshed-in stomach (natural causes my arse, she thinks), what she would have been like if she had been a twin. Or if she had at least one sibling, someone else to spend her childhood with, to complain about their mum to, to fight with over the remote.

There's a chance, she reckons, that she would have liked it, being the one to protect someone. To be relied upon by someone else and looked up to.

But then there's an almost equal possibility that she would have resented them, this fictional brother or sister, and treated them poorly and skulked away when they tried to follow and told them to get lost when they interrupted what she was doing.

Her knife slips, then, accidentally slicing through Freddie's intestine and she has to lay the knife flat on the table while she calms herself.

It was something else they had in common, she and Katie. The way they treated people like they weren't worth spending time on. The way they both treated Emily.

What's the most concerning aspect of it, though, is that Naomi knows that, deep down, she's not a complete cunt so, really, it means that Katie mustn't be either.

It's the moment that Katie becomes a real person to her as she's staring down at the remains of a poor little fucker who never stood a chance, his eyes wide and almost pleading with Naomi to care about something.

About someone.

****

By the time Graphics comes around the next day, Naomi's feeling properly sick, almost to the point where she's considering skipping the class altogether.

She's remembered over the course of the last day how, really, fuck all that stuff with the frog (it was just messing with her mind, making her feel guilty, she reckons, and vows never to agree to dissect anything ever again) because Katie was just a bitch. There was nothing under the surface. Not like with Naomi who knows that she's much smarter than the majority of people at school (science geeks notwithstanding) and is just waiting for her chance to prove it in a place where other people will appreciate it.

But with Katie... Naomi couldn't say for certain, but she thinks she's got her pegged, actually. And so, stepping into Graphics, she ponders getting someone else to sit next to her, anyone would do, but Naomi's surprised to find Katie already sat at the desk they share together. Or shared, she decides.

She sits, though, and thinks that it's only going to take one word from Katie and she'll move seats. She'll demand a new place at the front of the class so she can pretend that Katie isn't even there and then she can get on with her life and stop fucking thinking about one or other of the Fitches all the fucking time.

But then, as Naomi sits rigidly, her back straight and her arms folded on the desk, she hears a chuckle to the right of her, low and throaty, and she feels a shiver run down her spine.

Twisting her head, she catches the gleam in Katie's eye and the way her smirk is almost bursting off her face.

Naomi pushes it away, whatever that feeling in her stomach is, and sighs in an effort to appear bored of Katie already.

"What, Katie?"

"Nothing, Naomi," Katie says with a wink. "It's fine."

"Look, Katie. If you've got something to say, why don't you just fucking - "

"Jesus. Always so fucking pissy. Maybe if you stopped acting like I'm about to pounce on you any second you'd loosen up a bit."

Naomi baulks. In all the scenarios that she had entertained where they had had this discussion not one of them had included an instance where Katie joked about being the one to want to kiss her, and in a second everything she thought she knew about Katie Fitch was scribbled out and re-written.

"I don't..." Naomi manages, wondering if she's gone as pale as she thinks she has, and then Katie narrows her eyes.

"Naomi, you don't actually think I'm going to fucking face-rape you in school, yeah? So just chill the fuck out."

Katie nods her head as if encouraging Naomi to believe her, red fringe bouncing as she moves.

And Naomi knows that she's dangerously close to looking like a massive freak, so she can't just give Katie what she wants - whatever that really is - so she deflects, and puts her Naomi face back on and pretends that she hasn't broken out in a cold sweat.

"Disappointing, Katie. If I'd known you were only up for snogging me when an empty bottle was pointing at you I'd have finished my vodka before breakfast and brought it in with me."

Katie snickers, the grin back on her face, and Naomi wiggles her eyebrows once, which causes Katie to laugh harder.

"Jesus, you fucking perv. You just want an audience."

"Heightens the experience, I reckon."

They're both laughing as their teacher comes in and settles the class down, Naomi taking the time to relax a little as she empties out the contents of her folder.

They work in silence, Naomi's concentration only broken when Katie, for totally no reason that Naomi can gather, pokes the back of her hand with a pencil. Naomi looks up from the sketch of her Snickers wrapper but Katie's got her head resting on her hand, her hair dangling over it like a bloody waterfall and Naomi imagines for a second diving into it.

She pushes the image away though, works on angles and shading until she's got an almost identical copy of the chocolate bar's branding, and it's only when Katie's pushing her chair back from her desk that she realises the bell's gone.

"Bye Naomi, see you Friday," Katie says with a wink.

"Yeah, bye." Naomi shakes her head and is about to pack everything into her folder when she notices some bubbly, rounded writing on the top of her page.

Leaning closer, she can see that it says:

You bring the vodka, I'll bring the lip gloss ;)

Naomi knows it's got to be a joke. It's just got to be.

But it doesn't stop her, once she's home and her head's still fucking spinning, from running her hand over the label of the bottle of Glen's that's on a shelf in the kitchen, noting that it wouldn't take much to finish it off. Not much, really, at all.

****

Walking into Graphics again on Friday Naomi's already managed to work herself into a bit of a panic.

She feels like an absolute moron, and she knows that Katie will have forgotten all about it, but she's wondering which Katie she'll have today.

Because there are two kinds: the Katie who she is around everyone else and the Katie she is around Naomi. She's someone different, totally, and Naomi's hoping that today she'll be joined by the one that she likes.

Although, really, Katie is potentially dangerous in any capacity - her ability to either infuriate Naomi to the point where she's seething or to make her smile in a way that makes Naomi want to giggle like the school-girl she is are two forms of ridiculous that Naomi has no idea how to handle.

****

Katie writes a note on Naomi's work again, this time during the lesson and followed by a gentle nudge to prompt Naomi to reply.

No vodka then?

Naomi smirks, hopes it's hidden by her hair, and writes her response underneath Katie's after a moment of tapping her pencil against her lips.

Afraid not. But I have got a half-full bottle of Ribena in my bag.

Katie's still looking and puts her pencil to paper before Naomi's even had time to move her hand away.

Rubbish. You're nothing but a disappointment.

Naomi sighs through a smile.

Sorry. Maybe you should just bring it yourself next time.

When Katie writes Deal with a little winking face next to it Naomi chances a glance to her right but Katie's already got her head down and is shading in a hooped earring so it makes it look like the sunlight is reflecting right off it. If she knows that Naomi is looking, she doesn't let on, so Naomi looks for a moment longer, casting her gaze along the length of Katie's fingers and she suddenly wonders what it would be like to put one of them in her mouth and...

She stops the thought there, and vows to stop reading porn online and goes back to her own work, but she realises that the more she tries to push it all away the stronger it comes back.

Which is why it doesn't help when, in the lesson that follows, and the lesson after that, and the one after that, Katie writes her notes, and they communicate that way. And Naomi laughs under her breath and Katie shakes her head and over-punctuates everything and writes LOLLLL!!! often even when she isn't actually laughing out loud at all.

But Naomi finds herself writing it back, and telling Katie that she's a stupid cow, and biting down on her fingernail while she waits for Katie to think of a response to what she's just said and it becomes a routine.

She finds herself looking forward to Graphics loads more than any other class (even English, especially since her teacher's gone and started balding and is no where near as good looking as he was back in Year 8 when she had him the last time) and even finds herself smiling at home as she flips through her folder and reads through all the conversations that she and Katie have had over the last few weeks.

Her mum must notice something and asks about it one morning, handing Naomi a banana and pushing some cereal in front of her.

"It's nothing, Mum. Just notes," Naomi mutters, ignoring the fruit and dipping a biscuit into her tea instead, aiming to discourage her mother from furthering the conversation. "What are these? They're nice."

"Garibaldis, love," she says, and is quiet until she leans down to kiss Naomi on the head, stopping by her ear to whisper: "And if he makes you smile like that then take as many notes as you like."

Naomi scowls into her cereal even as her cheeks burn hot.

She wasn't smiling that much. She knows it. She just couldn't have been because Katie just can't have that power over her.

She just can't.

****

They don't talk in any other lesson (and, Naomi figures, whatever they do in Graphics doesn't constitute as talking anyway) and that's sort of okay, really. Only, one time, she sees Katie in the toilets with some girls from their year and makes the mistake of saying, "Hi," at which Katie's eyes go wide and the other girls laugh, and Katie swallows.

Naomi's gaze turns steely (it has to, or she knows that they'll see that she's bothered) and she rolls her eyes and turns on her heel, finding another toilet to pee in. Another cubicle to take a few moments to collect herself in. Another space where she can be alone and away from that shocked look on Katie's face and those ridiculous girls.

She can't escape them altogether, though, and that night while Naomi clutches at her pillow and wills herself not to cry, she wonders why she ever thought that they could be friends when she had known along that Katie Fitch only existed to be her enemy.

****

When Katie doesn't turn up for Art the next day, which Naomi notices because Emily's already sat at their desk, Naomi is both relieved and disappointed. She can't figure out that last feeling when she hates Katie a little bit at the moment, but she doesn't get time to dwell on it because Emily's saying something that Naomi has to get her to repeat.

"I said, Katie's not here today. Do you want to sit with me?"

Naomi considers saying no, but then Emily's always been nice to her, and it's not her fault that her sister is a complete twat, so Naomi forces a smile and sits down.

They sit in silence the whole lesson, which Naomi is grateful for, because halfway through she realises how totally easy it is to be in Emily's company. She sort of wants to ask where Katie is (not that she cares) but Naomi doesn't want to break the little spell they're under by ruining it with the mention of Emily's sister.

There's a chance Emily was thinking the same thing, she gathers, when, as they're packing up at the end of the lesson, Emily reaches into her bag and pulls out a note with Naomi's name on it.

"Oh, here, I almost forgot - Katie wanted me to give you this." There's a disconnectedness to Emily's voice as she says it, in a way that makes Naomi think that she hadn't forgotten at all, and Naomi wants to reject the letter and prove to Emily (and herself) that she doesn't give a fuck what Katie wants.

She takes it though, mumbling a thanks and not meeting Emily's eyes, opting instead to stare intently at the little 'o' shape above the 'i' in her name and feeling a flutter in her stomach as she remembers Katie doing it in the notes they'd been sharing.

"Right, well. See you," Emily says, a slightly cheerier edge to her voice this time, and Naomi smiles at her before she leaves.

Still in her seat, she unfolds the note and reads it quietly to herself, worrying her bottom lip the whole time.

Right, she thinks. Right.

****

She mulls Katie's suggestion over for the rest of the day, trying to work out the pros and cons of doing what Katie wants. There's not much in it, and she decides that she'll do it, sliding back into her coat after dinner and slipping out silently through the front door.

****

Sneaking back into school grounds at this time of night was never something Naomi had considered doing. As much as she enjoyed the learning aspects of school it had never been a desire of hers to be there at any time other than when she was forced to be there by law (and by her own appetite for knowledge) but, still, it was kind of exhilarating to be breaking the rules.

It was easy to climb the gate, the part where the lock bolted shut providing just enough room for the toes of a ballet pump, and she was over it in no time.

The sound she made as her feet hit the ground on the other side seemed to echo around the grounds but it couldn't be loud enough for anyone else to hear. Her heart beat fast in her chest regardless as she quickly made her way to the bike sheds, where there was shelter and a small bench by the lockers.

She could make out Katie's silhouette as she approached and tried to ignore the way her heart beat a little faster at the clandestine nature of their encounter, and Naomi wonders, briefly, if this is some kind of set up.

But then, she figures, Emily would have wanted no part in that so she ploughs on until she's stood in front of Katie and being offered an open bottle of something that shimmers green in the moonlight.

"What the fuck is that?" is what she says in lieu of an actual greeting, and Katie chuckles.

"Battery acid. What do you think, you spaz - it's Apple Sourz."

Naomi tilts her head before taking it, still a little on edge and wondering if this is all a big trick, but decides What the fuck? and takes it from Katie's hand, swallowing a big mouthful.

"Jesus!" she says after the flavour hits her hard in the back of the throat.

"Good shit, right?" Katie grins and Naomi wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. "Going to fucking sit down then, or what?"

Naomi glares at her, but isn't sure Katie can really see her do it, and sits anyway.

They're quiet for a few moments, passing the bottle back and forth between them, before Naomi gets fed up with this particular brand of silence (wishing for a moment that Katie were as easy as Emily) and breaks it.

"So, then. You wanted to apologise about something?"

"Mm," Katie hums, screwing the lid back on the bottle. "The other day, in the loo. That was a bit shit."

Naomi laughs despite herself, and it's a natural, honest laugh that must confuse Katie as she's slapping Naomi's thigh with her knuckles, and it makes Naomi laugh more.

"Not much of an apology, really. I've said sorry to strangers I've bumped into with more sincerity."

"Ugh," Katie scoffs. "I'm fucking trying, all right? I just... I felt proper crappy after doing that but..."

"But what, Katie?" Naomi asks, all mirth gone from her voice. "You have to make sure that everyone knows how cool you are? How you don't like that weirdo, Naomi, and that you're embarrassed she's even talking to you?"

"No, it's not like that!" Katie says, her voice rising. "It's just that... that they don't know..."

"Don't know what, for fuck's sake?" Naomi can almost make out Katie's eyes in the darkness, and watches as Katie blinks once, twice, opens her mouth to speak and then closes it again.

"Just that..." she finally says, unscrewing the cap back off the bottle. "Just that we're friends."

Naomi makes a noise, huffing out through her nose, and snatches the bottle from Katie's hands before she's even been able to take a sip. "Is that what we are?"

"Well... yeah. Aren't we?" Katie asks, and it's the first time Naomi's heard her sound anything other than confident, and remembers the look in her eyes right before she kissed her that time, and she ends up taking a larger gulp of the Sourz than she intended to and chokes a little as it goes down.

"Christ Naomi," Katie's saying as she rubs Naomi's back in slow circles. "I didn't think the thought of that would make you fucking choke."

Naomi laughs again (Katie seems to make her do it with such ease that it's unsettling) and passes the bottle back over.

"Yeah, well. You don't exactly make it obvious, do you? I mean, you barely speak to me, and when I just say hello to you you look like I've kicked your puppy."

"For a start, I don't even have a puppy. And, like, B - I'm fucking trying, okay?"

Naomi smirks in the darkness, raising her eyebrows and waiting for Katie to look away. She doesn't, so Naomi has to first before she can hear any more of Katie's breath steadily flowing from her slightly parted lips.

She gets out her fags and offers one to Katie, who declines.

"So you don't smoke. That's funny," Naomi says, lighting up.

"What is?"

"That Emily smokes and you don't."

She feels Katie tense beside her and barely has enough time to brace herself before Katie's hissing: "My sister doesn't smoke, okay? I don't know where you got that idea, right, because she doesn't, and she would tell me if she did."

Katie's almost seething and it's a little bit scary, and Naomi really doesn't want to land Emily in it, so she backtracks, placing a hand on Katie's knee before she's even thought about it.

"Jesus, Katie. Fuck, sorry. I must have been mistaken, yeah? Sorry."

Naomi feels Katie relax under her fingertips, and is about to pull her hand away when she feels Katie's on top of it, squeezing gently.

"Fuck. Yeah, yeah, okay. I just... she tells me everything, you know? And she doesn't hide stuff from me because she knows I'd find out about it."

"Okay," is all Naomi can manage. It's not her responsibility, she knows, to get involved in the (apparently very close) relationship between Katie and Emily, and it's definitely not her place to share a secret of Emily's that Naomi knows by accident.

"Yeah," Katie says, and moves her hand away, so Naomi follow suit, wrapping her fingers around the hem of her skirt to keep her fingers warm.

She's worried that she's ruined the atmosphere, which she knows is ridiculous really because she's only there so Katie can apologise to her for being a dick to begin with. And she's about to make her excuses and leave before Katie passes the bottle back over with a smirk.

"So," she says. "Did I miss out on drawing any still life in today's lesson? Or did Mrs. Appleby let the fruit go mouldy again?"

"Still death, you mean?" Naomi says with a wink that she's not sure Katie can see.

"That doesn't even make sense, you twat," Katie laughs and nudges Naomi with her shoulder.

Naomi laughs for the third time that evening, and spends the rest of the bottle increasing the tally until she's lost count.

****

Before they go their separate ways (Katie's found a hole in the fence at the back, which Naomi says is a worrying way to go until Katie rolls her eyes and shines the torch from her phone into Naomi's eyes and looks at Naomi like she's retarded) Katie hands over the empty bottle.

"What's this for?" Naomi asks, and doesn't realise she's pointing it in Katie's direction until she feels warm lips on her cheek. In her mind, she recoils, panics, runs. But in reality, she closes her eyes and smiles.

"Figured it was your go, seeing as you rushed off before we could play any more," Katie says quietly, and Naomi thinks that she's smiling too.

"Right," Naomi says, a little dazed, and watches as Katie stands and sways a little.

"Anyway, I need to fuck off. If I don't get back soon Ems will have a panic attack or something."

"All right. Thanks for... you know."

"Yeah," Katie almost-whispers, and Naomi feels like they're too close, even though she's still sat down and there's a good foot between them. And she's got a lovely warmth all over that she knows is from the alcohol but can't help relating to Katie anyway.

(The last time she had been drunk she'd ended up kissing Katie and the memories she had spent all summer trying to suppress were suddenly back with a vengeance and Naomi has to blink them away before she remembers them too well.)

"Right. Ignore you tomorrow," Naomi grins, standing and pointing the bottle at Katie again before Katie looks pointedly at it and Naomi shakes her head and drops the bottle into her bag.

Katie laughs then, and says, "Yeah, sure. Until Graphics anyway."

Naomi thinks that Katie winks before she walks away, her arse just about visible in the moonlight, and Katie's already out of sight and earshot when Naomi mutters, "Yeah. Yeah, 'til Graphics," and mentally does the maths to figure out just how long that will be as she makes her way back to the gate.

****

She's surprised that she makes it home in one piece, really, especially seeing as that gate was a bit trickier after half a bottle of Sourz and it was so late that a lot of the houses had their lights off.

Nevertheless, though, she's home with minty breath and little clothing and climbing into bed within half an hour.

She falls asleep looking at the empty bottle that's now on her bedside table, wondering if Katie had managed to drug her into liking her just that little bit more. But then Naomi realises with a pang that Katie must know that Naomi already likes her, otherwise she would never have gone to meet her somewhere that could get them into a fuckload of trouble.

Her head hurts with the thinking about it all, so she lets her eyes drift shut remembering the taste of Katie's lipgloss on the rim of the bottle and the way in which, as they passed the drink between them, the taste became Naomi's.

It became theirs. Something they shared. Something they both owned.

****

The headache isn't a complete surprise, but Naomi can cope with it more than previous hangovers (which she thinks means she's getting used to them, which is just fucking worrying) so she doesn't complain to anyone.

Not that she has anyone to complain to, she remembers but then thinks that, actually, no. Perhaps that's not entirely true, as she watches Katie sway across campus, holding the door open for her friends before looking at exactly the place Naomi is standing and smiling quickly before following them in.

Naomi's smiling back when Emily walks into her line of sight, shaking her head at the door and then looking back round at Naomi as well, offering a small wave, which Naomi returns.

Emily's smile broadens and she enters the block with a bit more enthusiasm than she'd had about ten seconds ago, and Naomi thinks it's nice that by just being friendly to Emily she can make her smile. And that, unlike Katie, Emily is free with her smiles - she doesn't feel the need to hide them from the school, only from her sister.

She's wondering if she's actually friends with the wrong twin when her pocket vibrates. There's a number she doesn't recognise, but the sender is obvious.

Feel like shit! Last time I go late night drinking with you ;)

And, like that, Emily is forgotten, and Naomi grins all the way to Maths.

****

In Graphics, Naomi asks Katie in their usual way how she got her number.

Katie tells her:

LOLL - sorry babes, I drop-called you from your mobile while you were pissing in that bush last night.

Naomi actually does laugh out loud then, and gets a look from their teacher and a nudge to her leg from Katie.

Her pulse doesn't slow the whole lesson as Katie leaves her leg there, their knees pushed together and neither of them shifting enough to move them away.

****

Apparently, turning sixteen means that Naomi has to do something.

"Come on, darling," her mum says over breakfast the day before. "It's a big day! Sixteen beautiful years of your existence in my life."

"Ah," Naomi says, chewing on a mouthful of Cheerios. "So this is a celebration for you. Congratulations on your achievement."

Her mum laughs even though Naomi really wasn't trying to be funny.

"Not quite, sweetheart. But, in a way I suppose it is nice to be thanked for bringing you into this world."

"I'm eternally grateful, obviously." Naomi doesn't look up, and her mum doesn't catch the bitterness in her voice.

"Let's do something, then. What do you want to do?"

Naomi thinks for a moment, wondering how she can get out of this and worrying that if she doesn't come up with something then she'll be forced into indulging in a yoga evening or some tribal drumming down at the local art cafe.

And, well. She remembers that, once, a fucking long time ago, she went bowling and found that she was actually okay at it.

So that's what she suggests, and her mum looks confused for a moment before saying that that would be lovely.

It's not like Naomi has anyone to spend it with anyway. No one she would want to share such a special day with. And, besides, it'll be nice to throw something about and see what happens.

As long as there aren't any fucking hippies around she'll be happy, she reckons, and finishes her cereal actually looking forward to an evening out of the house that won't lead to a giant hangover.

****

She's already got two strikes by her fourth go and her mum is looking like the cat who ate the canary, which sort of pisses Naomi off because she never really takes this much interest in her school work but for some reason she is proud that her only child can throw something heavy at small objects and knock them over.

It's her mum's go, and she's taking forever, so Naomi takes a moment to close her eyes and focus on the sound of the balls rolling and hitting and it's rather soothing until she hears something. The sound of something - someone - familiar, and she knows it's Katie before she's even opened her eyes.

Naomi twists around in her seat, the plastic coating making it easy to slide around in one swift motion, and she has to strain her eyes to see past the groups of teenagers and parents with annoying, screeching children but there she is, a few lanes down, struggling to hold up a ball that's almost the size of her head.

The sight of it is almost ridiculous - Katie's red hair clashing violently with bright pink of the ball; a purple bow doing nothing to keep her hair back out of her eyes as she leans forward; a grey and black top barely keeping her boobs inside of it - but it makes Naomi smile before she can stop herself.

And it's not that Katie's at all graceful, but it's that she tries when she doesn't need to, and it's a bit endearing, Naomi thinks by accident, leaning forward onto her arms.

She's still smiling, watching as Katie puts the palm of her left hand to the other side of the ball, when a boy - Andrew McGarry, Naomi notes with a sneer - approaches Katie from behind and puts his hand on her hip.

Naomi feels herself flush as he spreads his fingers out and grips at the fleshy part of Katie's waist, and she flicks her hair over her shoulder and laughs, and of course she's there on a fucking date when Naomi's there with her mum.

It all just feels so pathetic, that really her first actual choice for a date is someone she barely knows and the second... well, ditto for the second but she's already otherwise engaged, apparently.

(Her mind briefly contemplates a third option but she knows that person even less well than the first two and she knows whose fault that is.)

She's still watching - glaring - when she can hear her mum saying something behind her.

As Naomi turns around, she spots her grinning up at the scoreboard with her hands on her hips, and she softens a little.

"Did you see that, love? I actually bloody got one!" Gina says, resting her teeth on her bottom lip and raising her eyebrows, and Naomi laughs quietly. Sometimes, just sometimes, her mum was kind of lovely.

"Nice one, Mum. Hey," Naomi starts, standing. "You all right for a minute while I nip to the loo?"

"Yeah, fine love. Want another lemonade?"

"Please," Naomi calls back over her shoulder, already on her way, striding straight past where she knows Katie is, and into the ladies' loos.

She's barely made it through the door when she realises she's been followed, and turns around to find a very impatient Katie looking less pleased than she had about five minutes ago.

"Oh, hi Katie, I - " Naomi starts, but is quickly interrupted.

"Christ, Naomi. How fucking long did it take? I text you ages ago."

"You text - sorry, what?"

"Ugh, you are such a useless twat sometimes," Katie says, exasperated, and reaches into Naomi's bag, producing Naomi's phone from the pocket where it was always kept.

"Wait. How did you know - "

"Naomi, thank Christ you're here," Katie reads, ignoring her. "This twat is driving me mental - meet me in the loos so we can make a plan to get him to fuck off. K, kiss kiss."

Katie finishes and chucks the phone back at Naomi who has to fumble to catch it.

"And you didn't actually read it but whatever. You're here now and I need to get rid."

"Why don't you just leave? Or get him to take you home?" Naomi asks, trying to ignore the sudden wash of relief that's swept over her now she knows that Katie has no interest in McGarry, the spotty wanker.

"Because - and I really should remember not to forget that you're a complete fucking hermit - if I go home early on a Friday night then everyone will know and he'll tell them I'm fucking frigid or something. Not to mention the fact that I haven't spent a Friday night home alone for the last three years and I don't want to start now."

"Right," Naomi offers, trying to simultaneously take it all in and forget everything she's just heard.

"And that's Emily's job, staying in. She has her place and I have mine," Katie says, like she's just solved a riddle.

"Okay," is all Naomi can manage because Katie is talking kind of fast and the last few minutes have felt like she's been slapped awake from a rather non-threatening nightmare and that this is what the real world is like: fast, and bright, and loud.

But, also, kind of mesmorising, and Naomi finds that she can't stop watching Katie's lips, especially when she lisps and her tongue just darts out between her teeth. She's not sure how she's never noticed how perfectly plump Katie's lips are, and Naomi bites at her own to stop from thinking about them any further.

"So, right. What are we going to do?" Katie's asking, then, hands on hips and eyebrows raised, waiting for Naomi to say something brilliant, which of course she doesn't because she's had no practice in this sort of thing.

So, instead, she says, "We?" like the concept of them doing something together is totally alien (which it really, really isn't - not to Naomi anyway) and it's clearly not what Katie wanted to hear.

She stares at Naomi for a moment before sighing. "Fine. Stay here and bowl with your mum. I suppose I'll have to at least fucking let him feel me up a bit before the end of the night and it'll be your bloody fault."

Suddenly, the image of it is everywhere: his hands on her waist, like before, but sliding up higher, over Katie's stomach and ribs, and up until they're cupping her breasts and she's tilting her head back onto his shoulder and he's kissing her neck and it's all too fucking much.

She catches Katie's arm just as she's turning away and spins her back around.

"Okay, fine, for Christ's sake. We'll get rid of him," Naomi promises, hoping that Katie hadn't caught the fear in her eyes a moment before.

"Great," Katie says, smugly. "So what's the plan?"

****

It doesn't take long, in the end, to think of something. The hardest part is convincing Katie that it wouldn't be the worst thing ever for him to tell people she'd vomited during their date, and that he might not even tell anyone seeing as it's not exactly a compliment, is it?

So Naomi leaves Katie in the loos, touching up her make-up and telling Naomi to get the fuck on with it, and finds Andrew (not before receiving a wave from her mum that she only nods at) rolling a fag while he waits.

And apparently chivalry is actually dead because he doesn't even offer to check that Katie's okay and is out of there before Naomi's even had to resort to telling him that some of the puke got in Katie's hair (which she knows that Katie will be infinitely relieved about) and Naomi's drop-calling her in a matter of seconds to let her know that the coast is clear.

Naomi knows her mum's watching her, but she's just going to have to wait a moment longer, and then they can go back to their game. And Katie can... well, go and do whatever Katie does.

She's beaming by the time she reaches Naomi, though, and Naomi has to duck her head so as not to return a smile just as big (because, after all, what has she got to smile about?) and pretends to lock her phone even though she already did it.

"Good work, babes. With any luck he'll keep his fucking mouth shut too and just tell everyone that I'm a great snog," Katie says, placing a hand on Naomi's arm before speaking quietly, close to her ear. "And it's not like he'd be wrong, would he?"

Katie pulls back and winks, leaving Naomi standing open mouthed as she sashays past her.

It takes Naomi a moment, but she collects herself and calls after Katie. "Where are you going?"

Katie turns around and her grin is devilish, which makes Naomi question just how wise it was to help Katie with her plan when there was clearly a second part to it that Naomi wasn't privy to.

"That's your mum, isn't it? I'm going to say hi."

Naomi's too far away to stop her, really, and soon Katie's extending a hand to Naomi's mum and they're introducing themselves, laughing in Naomi's direction in a way that's way too similar to each other to be anything other than fond.

Something twists tight in Naomi's stomach (or possibly higher, around her lungs and...) and she knows that the longer she stands there the more she'll look like a twat, so she clears her throat, finds a smile, and heads on over.

****

It turns out that, actually, Katie's not bad at bowling, and definitely doesn't need any adolescent, smelly boys (and Naomi's well aware that her prejudice isn't for all boys, just for ones at her school, ones that she knows - ones that know Katie) to show her how to do it.

There's something disturbingly calming about the whole thing, and by the end of their game, Naomi's mum has managed to find out more about Katie than Naomi knew herself.

Katie likes something called Dub-step that Naomi has never heard of but Gina has, which kicks off some sort of bizarre discussion about new music and old music that Naomi can't quite follow but nods along to at points where she thinks she should.

And she doesn't like it when people confuse her with her sister, unless they've swapped to confuse their mum or a teacher, which Naomi's mum thinks is about the most hilarious thing ever. Naomi surprises herself by wanting to tell her mum that the whole thing is ridiculous because there's no way anyone could ever confuse the two of them and she realises how far she's come over the last few years. They're totally different people now. And Naomi could tell them apart in an instant.

When Katie tells Naomi's mum ("Gina, please. Mum makes me feel like I'm a right old bastard.") that her favourite lesson is Graphics Naomi turns her head back from where she's about to bowl and catches Katie looking right at her, impish grin on her face and sipping at Naomi's lemonade.

Naomi throws a gutterball. It's her first one ever. And it's a concept she's rapidly coming to associate with Katie - first kiss with a girl, first illegal drinking session at school, first friend to meet her mum...

She's still having a minor panic when her mum steps up to take her go and she sits next to Katie, who shuffles closer until their thighs are pressed tightly together, and Katie leans to talk into Naomi's ear.

"Fancy getting out of here? I mean, your mum's proper lovely but this has the potential to ruin my street cred, yeah?"

Naomi laughs, the tension easing.

"Fuck yes. Any suggestions?"

"We could just stay here for a bit, but, like go and play pool or something? Your mum's already slipped me a twenty for whatever and a taxi."

Naomi turns her head back to her mum, who's suddenly stepping forward to bowl and totally hadn't been eavesdropping, the cow.

"Right. Well, fine. Let's finish this and we'll ditch her old arse," Naomi says loudly, her mum stumbling as she releases the ball and it trickles slowly down the lane and knocks over one pin on the far left.

"Remind me," Gina huffs. "Why it is that the amount of money I give you is directly related to how horrible you are to me?"

They both laugh as Gina saunters over and pushes Naomi gently on the shoulder before going to back to wait for her ball.

Naomi catches the gleam in her eye before she goes, though. She wonders if it's how hers look when she's around Katie, too. She wonders if it'll give her away before she gets the chance to run.

****

Gina leaves them with instructions to have fun and not be back too early but doesn't do anything motherly like remind Katie to call her mum or be safe or mind how she goes. She just kisses Naomi on the forehead and Katie on the cheek, telling her how lovely it was to meet her.

When she's finally out of the door, Naomi releases a deep breath.

"Excellent," she says, although now she's actually alone with Katie she's not sure what to do. And, she figures, she might as well be honest about it. "Look, Katie, I don't normally do stuff like this so I don't know - "

"Naomi," Katie interrupts (which she apparently does a lot). "It's not like I do, either." And she looks coy, which throws Naomi. And, also, what? Because Katie is massively sociable and probably does this sort of this at least twice a week.

"Of course you do," Naomi scoffs. "You've got loads of friends, you're always doing stuff."

Katie looks up at her (even with her heels back on she's still a good foot shorter than Naomi) like she's just said two plus two equals fourteen and Naomi has no fucking idea what she's said wrong now.

"Right," is all Katie says. "Friends." And then she sighs before grabbing Naomi by the wrist and leading her into the pool hall. "Come on, you oblivious twit. Rack 'em up."

Naomi complies, still confused, still thrown by pretty much everything Katie says or does, and hopes that she's reds. She always seems to win with that colour. Always.

****

Katie refrains from saying anything else cryptic for their whole three games (which Naomi actually ends up being yellows for but wins two out of three anyway) and Naomi listens to her talk, something which Katie does with incredible ease.

It's a fair bit of boasting, and a little bit of Emily-bashing, which Naomi glares at her about until she rolls her eyes and says Sorry like she absolutely doesn't mean it and leans down to take her shot so that Naomi gets distracted by her cleavage and forgets that she was cross about something.

(Naomi wonders how boys cope with playing pool with girls if this is what happens, and then realises that that's probably pretty much the whole point.)

And it's only at around 10pm that Naomi realises that she's spent the evening of her sixteenth birthday with someone she's supposed to hate but is actually liking more and more as they go along.

She's smiling, she must be, when Katie asks her what she's thinking about.

Naomi's a bit appalled with herself when the first thing her mind says is You but she stops herself just in time and says, instead, that it's been ages since she had a fag and she'd like to nip out for one.

Katie rolls her eyes but agrees, just as she pots the black before she's supposed to and the whole thing's over.

****

They're outside, and it's kind of dark and a bit cold (as December often is), but it hasn't been raining so they take a seat on the pavement round the corner from the building.

It's because of the temperature, Naomi knows, that Katie squeezes herself up next to Naomi so that they're touching from shoulder to ankle.

Naomi shivers. So does Katie.

"You could have told me it was your birthday, you know," Katie says after a moment, causing Naomi to pause as she's about to light her cigarette. She turns her head slightly, but she can't see Katie's face as she's rested her head on Naomi's shoulder, and Naomi ends up brushing her lips over Katie's hair completely by accident.

(She tries not to inhale, because that's what creepy stalker-types do and Naomi's not quite that bad. Yet.)

She turns back to her cigarette and mutters with it pursed between her lips, "Yeah, well. You could have told me you were on a date with Andrew McTwatface."

"Hardly the same thing, is it? I mean, some things are important, right?"

"Not really," Naomi scoffs, finally lighting her fag and taking a toke.

She's barely had enough time to inhale properly before Katie's swiped it away and Naomi is about to object strongly but then doesn't know what to say when she sees Katie put it between her own lips and suck way too hard.

"Jesus, Katie!" Naomi says, rummaging around in her bag for a bottle of juice as Katie coughs and splutters out the smoke. "Not so fucking hard - it's not a cock, for Christ's sake."

"Ugh," Katie moans, taking the bottle from Naomi and swallowing down several large gulps of Ribena. "Don't be disgusting."

"Disgusting? I thought you liked that sort of thing?"

Katie takes another gulp as Naomi plucks the cigarette back out of her fingers and takes a puff.

"Yeah, but... ugh," Katie croaks. "Don't worry."

Naomi waits for Katie to calm down a bit, only then realising that she's been rubbing her hand up and down Katie's back.

She takes her hand away, letting it rest on the floor behind them both.

"Thanks," Katie says, blinking, and hands Naomi back the bottle.

"What did you do that for, Katie? You fucking hate smoking," Naomi asks, rolling her head to the side. Katie leans back on her arms, mimicking Naomi's movements.

"Dunno. Thought I should give it a go, you know? No point in dissing something until you've tried it."

"Right," Naomi says. "That your policy for everything?" The question's more loaded than she intended it to be, and Katie's a lot smarter than Naomi gave her credit for because she doesn't even blink when she catches Naomi's eye.

"Sort of, I suppose."

"And," Naomi says, noting how their shoulders are touching, how Katie's eyes seem half-closed but totally open at the same time. How her lips are pursed and her throat is moving to swallow. "And what do you do when you realise you like something?"

"I usually do it again," Katie says, quietly, and all it takes is the flicker of Katie's eyes down to Naomi's lips before Naomi's kissing her. Again. But so, so very differently.

There's no one to see, this time. No one to impress or tease. No one to high-five or laugh with after.

It's just them, illuminated in the neon lights from the sign on the outside of the bowling alley and the streetlights and the ever-present moon who's decided to make himself bigger and wider and more reflective of the sun's rays than ever before.

It can't have lasted that long, even though Naomi feels like it's lasted forever, but soon Katie's pulling back slowly, just enough for them to look into each other's eyes.

"Oh," Naomi says.

"Happy Birthday, Naomi," Katie whispers before she's closing the distance between them again and Naomi's welcoming her in, her cigarette dropped and forgotten about as all of the stuff she's been trying to pretend she doesn't want dissolves into nothing, and she twists her fingers in Katie's impossibly soft hair and pulls her closer.

Because, it seems, she can.

****

Naomi's not sure how long they're there for, but it feels like not long before people are coming out of the bowling alley in dribs and drabs, and are rather close to catching two girls snogging quite intensely, so Naomi pulls away (completely reluctantly) and stands, reaching out her hands for Katie's.

Once they're on their feet (and she really doesn't know why) she starts running, and Katie's running with her, surprisingly fast for someone in heels, and laughing.

She's saying Naomi's name breathlessly when Naomi gathers that she should stop and they've found themselves closer to a main road than she'd meant to take them.

It's takes her a moment to realise that Katie's fingers are still wrapped around her own and she's not making any effort to take them away.

But, then, they have just been snogging so the hand-holding is tame in comparison. Yet Naomi can't help but feel that it's this that means something. That Katie is still there after the snogging, that she's holding onto her like she's not ready to let go.

It's Katie's turn to drag them a little further away down the road until they're not quite in view of any passing cars and she takes Naomi's other hand so that they're facing each other.

"So then, you do like me?" Katie says with a grin, but Naomi catches the question, almost like it wasn't supposed to be one. So she grins back.

"I dunno, you're all right I suppose."

Katie looks like she's about to protest but Naomi feels a bit brave, like this night was meant for her, and she leans down before Katie has the chance to say anything and kisses her again, just briefly, but it's enough. She can tell by the dumbly dazed look on Katie's face and the way that Katie's still not letting go of her hands.

"You like me too, right?" Naomi says with a wink once Katie's opened her eyes.

"Shut up," Katie says, right before she kisses her again.

****

The taxi drops Katie off first, and Naomi watches her leave, makes the driver wait until she's all the way through the front door.

They'd said they'd see each other Monday, which Naomi knows will mean from afar and although it makes her feel a little dejected, that she knows whatever happened tonight will be something that won't change anything at school, it'll be enough. Just knowing that she'll at least see Katie again, and soon.

Before the taxi drives away, she looks back at the house, and she catches the sight of a curtain being pulled back across in the top window.

Katie's room, she thinks, but then remembers: their room, and wonders which Fitch had been looking down from the window, but really knows that it must have been Emily because Katie wouldn't have made it upstairs quite so quickly.

She doesn't know why there's a feeling of guilt that pools in her belly. Why knowing that Emily had been watching makes her inexplicably worried, because, really, she might not have even seen Naomi there in the back of the cab. It could have been anyone there, anyone squeezing Katie's hand and missing the feel of her once she'd gone.

Naomi lets it worry her until she's almost home and she feels her phone vibrate.

Thanks for saving me tonight. You'll have to do it again soon. K xx.

She can't help the grin that settles on her face, nor the warmth in her stomach, which she knows, this time, isn't because of alcohol or adrenaline or anything other than just Katie.

Her mum's still up when she gets in, and she calls out to Naomi to come into the kitchen.

"All right, love?" she asks, looking up from the joint she's rolling.

"Yeah, yeah not bad. Thanks for bowling, I had fun."

"Good. And... Katie's a lovely girl, you know."

Naomi pauses, wonders if there's an implication behind that, and then resolves that, even if there is, she's not quite ready to talk about it yet.

"Yeah, she's all right. I'm off to bed," she says, leaning over quickly to kiss her mum on the cheek. "Night."

"Night love," she hears her mum call, but she's already on her way out, phone in hand and lip between teeth as she ponders a message that will end up taking her twenty minutes to construct but, in the end, only says:

Well, I'm sure that can be arranged. Thanks for letting me. Nx.

****

She's in bed by the time the fear starts to creep in.

It's different, what happened tonight. Different than before. And she knows that it meant something, or means something, to her but... Katie likes boys, right? And even if she might like girls too then she's still not even happy with letting people know Naomi is her friend, let alone...

It's not what makes Naomi's head spin, though. And she can almost accept that this might have just been something that happened and that would be that. What gets to her, really, is that now she knows. Now she knows what she wants - who she wants - and that there's no turning back.

She's in it. And there's a very slim chance that she'll get out of it now, even if she wants to.

Chapter Three