Fic: ... And the Battle Began (Chapter 10, Part Three)

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The night before she's due to leave, only a week after ending things with Katie, Naomi trundles over to the Fitch house with a decent-sized box full of Katie's things.

It's not that she wants to return them, particularly, but she just doesn't feel like she has the right to keep them.

She'd confirmed her visit with Katie earlier in the day so that when Naomi's walking up the driveway Katie's stepping out of the front door.

Naomi's stunned with how different she looks - no make up on, hair tied back and dressed in a simple vest top and tracksuit bottoms.

She's gorgeous, a complete vision, and Naomi has to remind herself that she's not really supposed to be looking at her like that anymore.

"Hi," Naomi says, trying a small smile that Katie doesn't return. "You look good, Kay."

Katie snorts and shakes her head, folding her arms around her waist. "Oh please. I look a fucking state and we both know it."

"No, no you don't at all. You look... like you."

"Leave it out, Naomi. I don't really think now's the time to take an interest in my appearance, yeah? It's been long enough."

"Right." Naomi looks down, kicks at a stone and takes a deep breath. "Well, here you go. I think that's everything."

She steps forward to hand Katie the box, which she takes, and then she steps back to her original spot.

"Okay. Thanks." Katie holds the box close to her chest, like it's guarding her.

"I... I kept some of the photos. I hope you don't mind."

"Why do you think I'd want them? Your face is hardly something I want to be reminded of."

Naomi sighs and bites her lip to keep from saying something horrible that she wouldn't really mean. Besides, Katie can have her moment if it makes her feel better.

"Well, okay then. I'll see you around," Naomi says quietly and turns to leave. She doesn't even take one step away before she's turning back around again to where Katie's still watching her. "You know... fuck. You know I never wanted it to end this way. I hope you can understand that."

Katie laughs softly, then, the anger mostly gone from her face, and sets her box on the floor before straightening up and closing most of the distance between her and Naomi.

It's difficult not to flinch because Naomi's not convinced she hasn't earned a smack in the face, but she waits and swallows hard instead.

"Naoms," Katie says, smiling sadly, and reaches out to take both of Naomi's hands. "I hope that you understand that I never wanted it to end at all."

It's the moment Naomi's heart would have broken if it wasn't being so tightly held together by Emily but, still, it seems that Katie had a stronger hold on it than Naomi was aware of and, by the time she's crying, she's got Katie in her arms again.

"I'm sorry," she's saying. "I'm so fucking sorry, Katie."

"Me too," Katie cries into Naomi's shoulder, and as they're pulling back, hands on each other's wet faces, it's just natural that they come back together, one last time.

It's a slow kiss, and it takes Naomi back to sitting outside a bowling alley, not knowing what the fuck was going on, and New Year's Eve when Katie had shown up, guns blazing, just to let Naomi know that she wanted her.

Katie's kiss says, Hey, hey remember that first time I kissed you in the street? Or that time we argued over wine in Sainsbury's and you kissed me to get me to shut the fuck up? and Naomi's kiss back tells her that yes, yes she does. She remembers it all.

And she's going to take it with her, locked inside her. It almost makes her want to take everything else back, tell Katie they shouldn't break up, that this whole thing has been a stupid mistake but she knows she can't and, when she leans her forehead against Katie's and they're both breathing a little heavily, it feels like goodbye.

"I know you probably won't believe this, and... and whatever happens in the future, whatever happens to us... I just want you to know that I do love you. Just... not..."

"Oh God, please shut up now," Katie says with a low chuckle, gripping tightly to the back of Naomi's neck.

"You know, though, yeah?" Naomi asks and when Katie nods it moves both their heads up and down. "Okay, well. I should go."

"Okay," Katie sniffs and steps back, wiping at her eyes with her finger. "Like, take care, yeah?"

They both laugh after a beat, through the tears, and Naomi backs away. "You too, Katie."

And then she turns around, quickly walking in the direction of the bus stop and not looking back.

By the time she gets there her tears have dried. It feels to her like proper closure, like that chapter is over.

She only wishes that starting the new one was something she could do as easily.

****

In bed that night, Naomi's thinking about letting things go. About moving on and finding something new. She's wondering if she knows who she is without Katie, whether people will understand her as just Naomi.

They'll never accept her and Emily, not in a million years. Her mum will look disappointed, and Emily's mum will probably have a heart attack and Katie will... She can't ever get that far, when she thinks about it, because she's never got as far as having thought about telling Katie, let alone trying to figure out how she'll react.

She rolls onto her side, trying to convince herself that it's better this way. Emily will understand and, one day, she'll know that what Naomi did was for the best, for all of them.

It's not selfish, what she's doing. It's the most selfless thing she's ever done. She just wishes that she could say goodbye to Emily properly, in person, without it breaking her resolve, but Naomi knows that as soon as Emily's in her line of sight then Naomi won't be able to help but go to her, kiss her like she's dying to and make good on her promise that they would be together.

But, she thinks as she unlocks her phone and scrolls down to Emily's name, there's no realistic way they can be together without it splitting up Katie and Emily, ruining them forever. It's time to put an end to it, Naomi knows, as she hovers over Emily's name and finally presses delete.

****

Her mum drives her to the airport the next day, reminding her about what to say to the taxi driver and where the phone numbers are in case of emergencies and Naomi has to remind her mum that just because they haven't taken advantage of her dad's generous offer to use his holiday house in Spain since they moved to Bristol it doesn't mean she's forgotten anything.

"I know love, sorry. It's just that you haven't ever gone by yourself and I know what it gets like out there and -"

"Mum," Naomi interrupts and places a hand on Gina's knee. "It's fine. I'm looking forward to spending some time by myself, you know? Things have been a bit... intense lately. And I just want the chance to work a few things out. On my own."

Gina's quiet for a while but Naomi catches her looking over every so often and in the end she just says, "I'm proud of you, darling. For handling this all so well."

It feels a bit ridiculous to Naomi, that this is something her mum is proud about, but then she doesn't know the whole story and it's just fucking easier to go with the flow sometimes.

"Thanks, Mum."

"And, maybe one day you can tell me just what the fuck this is all about really, because, honestly - I know sexuality is fluid and everything but that boy... what was his name? Cole or something? Is he really your type?"

Naomi opens her mouth to protest but then she thinks about what her type actually seems to be and starts laughing, leaning over to kiss her bemused looking mother on the cheek before promising that she would tell her one day.

She's not sure that she will but maybe, after a few bottles of wine and a few years have passed, just maybe this will all seem slightly less life-altering than it does now and she'll be able to tell her mum about that time she went out with a girl called Katie and fell madly in love with her twin sister, Emily, before realising that she was never meant to be part of their lives and bowing out gracefully before anyone got seriously hurt.

(She doesn't include herself. Hearts heal, even if it does feel like it's breaking the further away from Bristol she gets.)

****

Saying bye to her mum is fine - it's only a two week trip, after all - and Naomi does a couple of very slow laps around the shops after she's checked in.

She's come armed with books but goes to WHSmiths anyway, stopping and picking up anything that she thinks Emily might like and, when she realises she's doing it, she drops the book she's holding like it's scalded her and goes to join the ridiculously long queue at Costa Coffee to get a frappuccino to cool her down a bit.

After that she stops wandering around and gets her itinerary out to check it for the umpteenth time and, as she's folding it up, she glances up and her heart almost stops when she sees a flash of bright red hair in the distance. When the girl turns around Naomi's heart seems to kickstart again - of course it isn't Emily. She doesn't even know where Naomi is, although there is the chance Cook's given her the letter by now: he was under strict instructions to give it to her no earlier than three o'clock today and it's now almost four. She reckons that she probably hasn't got it yet, though, because she would have called. And, not that Naomi wants her to call but her phone's been wedged into her pocket so she'd feel it if it vibrated and so far there's been nothing.

So, as she flips open her Spanish dictionary to remind herself of a few of the words she thinks she might have forgotten, she lets herself slip away, biding her time until her flight is called and she can get some peace and quiet.

Finally.

****

It's not until she's on the plane that it hits her: she's not going to be with Emily.

She'd been thinking about the bigger picture, about the politics and the logistics of it all, so she'd forgotten to think about what that all meant (or maybe she'd just put it off to save from going back on her decision) to her emotionally.

The emptiness creeps back in and she wants to get off the plane and run and run until she finds Emily and tells her not to read the stupid note and to forget the whole thing.

There's still time, she thinks then, and gets out her phone to text Emily before realising that she doesn't have Emily's number anymore and she almost bites through her lip trying not to scream.

"Miss?" she hears to her right and looks up from her aisle seat to catch sight of one of the flight attendants leaning over her, all cleavage and mint breath. "Sorry Miss, but we need you to turn off your mobile now."

"Yeah, just a minute," Naomi huffs, frantically typing out a message to Cook with shaky thumbs.

"No, Miss - it's dangerous for take-off. You need to do it now."

"Ugh, fine." Naomi says and pretends to press the button, smiling with snark at the attendant's back as she sashays up the aisle. When she's back at the front of the plane, Naomi carries on sending her message, ignoring the tut from the middle aged woman next to her.

It sends as they're being shown where the exits are and Naomi knows that she actually will have to turn it off soon so she holds it in both hands and wills it to vibrate.

The reply comes from Cook and Naomi throws her head back, stares at the ceiling and stops listening to the safety procedure.

She'd rather they all went down, just so she could be free from all of this. They're probably all as guilty of something as Naomi is, they just don't see it.

She kicks herself, mentally, and apologises in her head to all of the people. Maybe she could jump out of the emergency exit quickly, somewhere over the water, and they can shut the door behind her. The snooty tutting woman would probably think good riddance to her anyway.

Naomi looks down at her phone one last time - Shit, sorry mate. Ten minutes too late, all in caps, like he's shouting at her - and turns it off.

****

Of course it's fucking raining when she gets there. Why wouldn't it be?

Luckily, it's warm and Naomi only gets a mild spattering of rain on her as she runs from the arrivals lounge at Jerez to jump in a taxi, and she gets into the car as he puts her shit in the boot.

"El Olivio, Finca Higueron, por favor," she says, almost brightly, and the driver nods.

"Si, senorita."

It feels like a different world already and Naomi slinks down in her chair as she ignores the rest of Spain start to wake up for the evening, and waits until they're pulling up in at the apartment before she moves again.

Another mad dash after handing over more Euros than she'd ever spend in pounds on a taxi and she's unlocking the door and almost falling in. It looks exactly how she'd remembered it - smallish, unstylish and very, very empty.

"Perfect," she says out loud and takes her shoes and socks off at the door before padding in to see what her dad's (or, more like, the new Mrs. Dad) has stocked the fridge with.

It's more than relief when she sees it's mostly wine and orange juice and she doesn't wait for another second before cracking open a chilled bottle of white and pouring herself a glass.

There's crap on the TV but it'll do - she's not really watching anyway, and it takes her a while to settle on something that isn't the news before she flicks through the takeaway menus that have been left on the table and decides she's not even hungry.

She'll eat tomorrow, maybe. If she feels like it.

She's wondering what Emily's eaten today when she feels herself get unexpectedly tired and she's only got enough time to put her glass down before she's nodding off.

****

It's dark when she wakes up, though she has no idea what time it is. It could be 10pm or it could be 3am - it doesn't matter.

She's stretching when she hears a noise - a car pulling away - and she realises that that's what woke her.

The TV's still on and humming in the background, playing out a Spanish soap opera that has men with hairy chests clinging to women with bad perms and Naomi rolls her eyes as she swings her legs off the couch.

She jumps out of her skin, then, when there's a loud bang on the front door.

"Fuck me," she says, and then takes a small step forward. It could be the neighbours, she thinks, but then looks at her watch and it's actually just gone midnight so she thinks it's unlikely.

It's still raining and Naomi can't make out who's behind the door, and it's got her heart racing but then she remembers that robbers don't usually knock - though sexual deviants might.

She's still pondering her next move when the door goes again. Only this time it's followed by a muffled shout of, "For Christ sake, Naomi - I fucking know you're in there, okay? We had the same taxi driver."

Naomi goes from confused to completely aware of what's happening and she's at the door and fumbling with the lock in seconds.

It takes her a moment, leaving her squeaking out a, "Hang on!" before she finally gets it open and pulls the door wide to reveal a very rain sodden and cross-looking Emily Fitch.

"Emily..." is all Naomi can manage, and her whole body's just tingling at the sight of her. She still thinks it could be a dream, though, that Emily's standing here, in actual Spain, and she's come all this way to see Naomi, but then she thinks that if it were a dream Emily would probably be smiling and falling into her arms instead of scowling and lugging her carry case across the threshold like a small child carrying an adults' pushbike.

"Jesus - give me a hand, please?" she says, blowing her hair out of her face.

"Oh, shit," Naomi darts into action, leaning over to pick up the case and drop it next to her own. "Sorry."

Emily copies what Naomi did about six hours earlier and takes her shoes and socks off straight away, flinging them into a corner.

Naomi watches her, shuts the door behind them both, and then goes back to watching Emily again as she sorts herself out and smooths down her rain-matted hair.

When she straightens up her features are hard and Naomi knows she's busted.

"Em, what are you-"

"Oh, don't you fucking Em me, Naomi. What the hell were you thinking?" she snaps, folding her arms and standing firm, water still dripping off her face and onto the brown-tiled floor.

Naomi almost laughs but thinks better of it. Emily might be here now but there's nothing to say she won't disappear again just as quickly if Naomi gets this wrong now.

"I..." she starts, struggling, and then just lets it go, averting her eyes. "I honestly don't know."

When she looks up again Emily's still staring at her, hard, but then she rolls her eyes and lets out a breath.

"Well... at least we're starting off with being honest. Not easy, is it?"

"Nope," Naomi shakes her head and looks Emily down and then up again. "Em, I know you're dripping wet but... I'd really like to give you a hug right now. How's that sound?"

Emily laughs and says, "Twat. What do you think?"

"Oh, thank God," Naomi sighs and then they're meeting in the middle and fuck Emily really is here and she's whole and she's just fucking here with her cold face pressed up against Naomi's neck and her arms trembling around it. "Ems, let's get you changed, yeah? And then you can carry on shouting at me for being a massive pussy if you like, once you're warm and dry."

There's a muffled chuckle and then Emily pulls back, eyes shining, tracing Naomi's face, as she pushes some hair back behind Naomi's ear. "Not as fun when you own up to it straight away though. Sort of leaves me with no ammo."

"Right," Naomi grins, and pulls Emily in closer. "Well, how about you get changed, I'll make us some tea and you can tell me how the hell you found me."

"Mm," Emily nods, but she doesn't move away. "That sounds fair but... can there be wine, please? I've been... a bit stressed and -"

"Not to worry," Naomi whispers, kissing Emily's nose. "Anything you want, babe."

It's hard to tell, because it's sort of dark, with just the glow from the TV illuminating the room, and Emily's just come in from the cold, but Naomi thinks that Emily blushes.

"Okay. Is there somewhere I can change?"

Naomi takes two seconds to think about it and then realises that she's being ridiculous thinking that Emily might not want to sleep in the same bed as her and leads her to the bedroom and points out where the toilet is.

Shutting the door on her way out Naomi leans against it for a moment, waiting for her heart to stop beating so fast.

She gives up after a while though, resigning herself to the fact that she doesn't think it'll ever beat normally again, not while it can feel Emily's is so close, keeping its rhythm, daring it to go just that little bit faster.

****

While she's waiting, Naomi hooks her laptop up to the speaker system and puts on something she thinks Emily will like, something Emily would have chosen. And then she pours Emily a glass of wine, but gets her some water as well, just in case, and then she waits.

It seems like forever, those few minutes, which is nothing compared to the last few months - or even years, really - and by the time the bedroom door's creaking open Naomi's already finished her glass of wine and is pouring herself another.

"Hi," Emily says from the doorway, and Naomi looks up, her breath catching as she does.

Emily's in her pyjamas - the blue and white checked trousers with a light blue vest - and her hair is fluffy from where she's dried it and, Naomi thinks, she's never been more beautiful.

She can't get carried away yet, though. They've got to talk. Properly.

"Hey. Come and sit down, Em."

Emily bites her head and bows her head as she walks over but Naomi knows she's just trying not to smile.

She reaches for her wine and closes her eyes as it goes down.

"God, thanks for that. I was going to bring a bottle, just in case I needed to bash it over your head, but your mum said that there's always plenty here, so..."

"Ah," Naomi nods, leaning back on the couch. "Mother dearest, of course. So - want to tell me what happened?"

Emily nods, and leans back on the couch, bringing her feet up so that they're tucked underneath Naomi's thigh and Naomi's struck with the thought about how they can do this now - it's not just the sex or the kissing, it's all the other little things that they've been missing out on.

"Right, well. First of all - bit of a fucking shocker that Cook knew about us. I mean, of all people, Naoms?"

Emily looks disappointed so Naomi shuffles closer and finds Emily's hand with her own. "He's actually a lot nicer than most people think. Don't worry - he's got his hands full fucking his own life up without wanting to mess with ours. He won't tell."

There's a sigh and a shrug, and then Emily's carrying on. "Okay, I'll trust you on this one. He was pretty discreet about it anyway. And when I burst into tears he gave me a hug, and then offered me a willy-waggle to cheer me up, which - really?" She laughs, then, and Naomi squeezes her fingers.

"Sorry."

"Don't worry now - I think I shouted at you enough in my head on the way here so it's okay. I was just... shocked. I didn't think you'd do something like this. Honestly, Naomi - what fucked up part of you thought you could run away from this, like really? I mean, I'd totally understand if you wanted some time, like to get away, but saying that you can't be with me because you don't want to break up me and my sister is just..." Emily chuckles even as Naomi's shaking her head.

"I just couldn't do it, Em. I couldn't be the reason that you two would..."

"Naomi," Emily says, seriously and slowly. "Do you have any idea how much I would hate her if she was the reason I couldn't have you? I mean, like, knowing you wanted me too."

"Yeah, but Em - don't you see? She's your sister, like, forever. When she finds out about this..."

"So," Emily says, looking up from underneath her fringe. "Is there still something for her to find out about, then?"

Inside Naomi, she's screaming Yes! Yes for fuck's sake of course there is! but she can't quite say it, not with knowing what it will mean for them all. And she's looking down at their hands, locked together, the way they're meant to be.

"Naomi..." Emily says shakily, and when Naomi looks up again Emily's pleading with her, silently, not to run from them. Be brave, she thinks, and smiles.

"This isn't going to be easy, you know. We're going to have to -"

Her words are cut off by Emily's lips and Naomi realises just how much she's missed doing this and it feels like home. It feels safe and warm but also exciting and dangerous. It feels like Emily and everything that comes along with her. It's why Naomi loves her.

"We'll work it out," Emily says against Naomi's lips before sitting back down. "If you can work with me, okay? I need you, now. Can you... tell me you can do that, Naomi."

Naomi nods and then downs the rest of her wine. "Will it be okay if I'm drunk for the next few months then? Just to soften the blow?"

"No, you twat," Emily laughs, and takes Naomi's glass away - refills it anyway.

They sit silently for a moment, and Naomi closes her eyes as Emily shifts around until she's got her head on Naomi's shoulder. Naomi's hums and kisses her hair.

"So. You got my note and then..."

"Well, I thought I might still catch you - I really wanted to shout at you - so I went to your house. Your mum took one look at me, invited me in, made me tea and I... I told her everything."

Naomi stiffens, and Emily must feel it because she's gripping Naomi a little bit tighter, then, snaking a hand around her waist and keeping her grounded.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. I've just been bursting for, like, forever to tell someone about this and I couldn't ever tell anyone. And then your mum was being so lovely and it almost looked like she knew anyway - if she was surprised then she didn't let on."

"She's such a bastard, isn't she? I bet she's known for ages," Naomi snorts and then feels a light kiss to her chin and she relaxes again. It's amazing, really, Naomi thinks, how quickly Emily undoes her with the simplest of gestures.

"Well, she was amazing, actually. Told me if I had the money then she had the address. And I got here as fast as I could."

"Where does everyone think you are, Em?" Naomi asks, moving so she can see Emily's face. "I mean, I'm guessing you didn't exactly tell them you were coming here."

Emily blushes, then, and averts her gaze. "Yeah, about that... we might owe Cook another one."

Naomi raises her eyebrows as Emily bites her lip. "What?"

"Yeah, I've... sort of run away with him. According to everyone else. His idea, actually."

"Oh my God." Naomi puts her head in her free hand, the one that's not wrapped around Emily, and takes a deep breath. "Please tell me he's not actually here."

"Ha, no," Emily chuckles. "Said something about going to see a man about a boat. Probably drugs, knowing Cook. I didn't really get it. But he said... he said he might not come back. So I could pretend it all went horribly wrong and that I'd come back alone. Blame him, you know."

"Shit. I hope he's all right."

"I suppose that he felt like he had no one to hang around for," Emily says, frowning and playing with Naomi's fingers. "I mean, that's what people do, right? When they think that people would be better off without them? They fuck off, don't they?"

"Emily..."

"But, see, Naomi - I do care. And I can't be without you, not anymore. So can we just -"

"Yeah," Naomi cuts her off, admitting defeat, and leans in. "Of course we can."

****

It feels strange, making love in a different place, with the air-con whirring away in the lounge and soft music filtering in from where they'd left it playing. Strange, but not bad. New, but not really.

Emily bends and folds for Naomi in ways she hadn't imagined possible. She bucks and arches, pushing away and pulling in Naomi's hands and mouth and legs and arms, breathing Naomi in and then breathing her out again.

And Naomi lets herself be taken like she's never done before - she gives herself over to Emily completely, and it's light by the time Emily's crawling back up her body and pressing an extended kiss to her lips as they breathe heavily through their noses.

"I fucking love you," Emily says, pushing her cunt against Naomi's already sticky thigh. "Do you get that?"

"Yeah, yeah I do," Naomi sighs, pushing upwards until Emily groans. "I love you too, so fucking much."

Emily whimpers against Naomi's lips and they begin again. Just because they can.

****

The days that follow are glorious, the sun having banished the rain the morning after they both arrived, and they spend late mornings after late nights eating various types of cheese on bread and drinking fresh coffee in the tropical garden that separates their apartment from next door's.

Naomi explains as best she can how her dad hasn't seen her since she was little but he said that she could use this place whenever he wasn't and that his dad's new wife, whose name Naomi doesn't know, doesn't live far from here so she comes and stocks up before Naomi gets here just so she doesn't have to go miles into town.

Emily looks impressed yet sad at the same time and when Naomi asks her about it she just shrugs and says, "It's nice, but it's not exactly a replacement for a dad."

It's not something Naomi's ever thought about, not in that way, anyway. She can't have one thing but she got another. It means she can't ever think about what she lost.

She smiles, though, and reaches over to flick an insect off of Emily's shoulder and the mood is broken and they're smiling again, dangling their hands between their chairs, letting them sway as the wind picks up around them.

****

It's a massive shock to Naomi, actually, that she can handle being around someone for this amount of time. Emily lets her be quiet sometimes, and they sit and read together silently, sometimes on totally different couches, but Naomi gets lonely so it doesn't take her long to find an excuse to join Emily wherever she is.

She thinks that Emily's secretly testing her, playing with her to see who moves first. Naomi doesn't think it's losing when she gets to be near Emily again.

****

Things change a little in the second week, although not for any reason that Naomi can pinpoint, and it's when she wakes up to a gentle shaking on her shoulder and realises it's wet that she knows something is wrong.

"Em? Emily, what's the matter?"

"Nothing," Emily sniffs, and then says, "Sorry. I'm sorry. I didn't want to wake you."

"Em," Naomi shifts around so she's leaning down over Emily and watching her wipe at her eyes. "Whatever it is, it's not nothing. What is it?"

"It's just... I think you were right."

Naomi's stomach drops. She's never right about anything and, whatever Emily thinks she's been right about, it can't be good.

"What do you mean?"

"This is going to be so hard. I haven't... she's my sister, my twin sister Naoms, and I've been so fucking selfish."

It's not the right time to laugh, so Naomi bites down on it and smiles down at Emily instead.

"Darling, listen. For starters, you should know that I'm rarely fucking right about anything - though I will deny that if you bring it up again later."

Emily laughs through her tears then and squeezes Naomi's arm.

"But this... I was dead, dead wrong. I mean, the situation is horrible but... you and me? This is real now." She takes Emily's hand and puts it to her face, turning to kiss it, she carries on. "And it's not selfish, not anymore. We can't stay apart just because of Katie."

"I know. I just... it's shit, isn't it? This is going to be so horrible."

"Give her time. I reckon she'll probably want to kick the shit out of us for a while but then after..."

"She'll never trust me again, Naoms. God, and my room... I really haven't thought this through, have I?"

Naomi thinks it, considers it for a second, and then says it out loud. "Come stay with me."

"What?" Emily sniffs. "Are you serious?"

"About you, yes. I've never been more serious or more sure of anything, ever. And... I know it's my fault, that all this happened. And things with Katie... it's going to be up to you to sort it out but I'll be there for you. Okay?"

"Naomi," Emily shakes her head and pulls away, lying down flat on her back and crossing her hands over her chest. "I don't want you to ask me to stay with you just because you feel guilty."

"It's really not that. I want you to come live with me, for as long as you need to. And we'll do it all together, okay?"

"Really?" Emily asks, rolling back over to where Naomi's leaning up on her elbow, and reaches for Naomi's hip.

Naomi doesn't even need to think about it. "Really," she whispers, and leans down to kiss Emily's tears away.

****

Getting back into England feels like stepping back into reality.

It's grey there, overcast and threatening to rain, and Naomi shivers against Emily as they wait for Gina.

"You sure about this then?" Emily asks and Naomi looks down at her; she's caught the sun a little bit, and her nose is pinker than usual from it. Her fringe is starting to grow out so that it's almost in her eyes, and Naomi brushes it away before holding Emily's face in both her hands.

"I am. I'm shitting myself, but I am. How about you?"

Emily sighs. "I can only hope that she'll speak to me again one day. And that she doesn't put me in hospital."

"Don't joke." Naomi pulls her in closer and Emily shakes her head with a small laugh.

"Wish I was, hon."

They see Gina pull up, waving at them frantically from the car as she cranks on the handbrake.

"Well, if you're short on family members for a bit you're more than welcome to share my mum. I think she already loves you a little bit by the looks of her."

"Well," Emily says, pulling away and levelling Naomi with a barely-contained smirk. "I am very lovable."

"That you are." Naomi says, and leans down, once again, to show Emily just how true that is.