The Art of Espionage (and How Not to Do It); spy!B1A4; PG
Title: The Art of Espionage (and How Not to Do It)
Author: flusteredmess
Rating: PG
Pairing/Focus: B1A4 as spies ;;
A/N: I've wanted to write spy!B1A4 since forever. Hopefully this doesn't fail too much. /o/
"So who are we killing now?" Sunwoo asks casually, soda can in hand. He takes a deep gulp just as Junghwan coughs and sputters orange juice all over the folder on his lap.
"You can't just say that in public." Junghwan looks around the nearly deserted park nervously before he leans dangerously close to Sunwoo's face. "What if people from the Other Agency are tuning in on us right this moment? What then?"
Sunwoo makes a face, shrugs, and aims for the trash can a few feet away from their bench. He misses, and they both watch the can roll away into the nearest bush.
"The Boss is never going to give you an official gun at this rate."
"Shut up." Sunwoo frowns, looking genuinely hurt. He snatches the folder from Junghwan and ignores the latter's cries of protest. "I still have a lot of options anyway; flamethrowers, chainsaws, bazookas--"
His frown grows deeper as he holds up a picture of a boy clad in a school uniform, a bright smile on his face. Sunwoo reckons that they're around the same age.
He turns to Junghwan, head cocked and a curious expression on his face.
"We're going after a high schooler?"
There's a pause before Junghwan answers. "Well, yeah. Apparently his dad is some big-time scientist who's working with the government. The rest of the information is a bit murky -- you know how it is with The Boss -- but rest assured that we're doing this for a better cause."
"Hm." Sunwoo replies, eyes scanning the papers that held the basics about their next target. "Gong Chansik," he reads aloud, "181 cm, 63 kg, born on 14th of August... you know, I don't exactly get why they even bother giving us all this useless information. I mean, we're just going to end up killing the guy anyway."
"Yeah, about that..." Junghwan says. "The Boss strongly ordered that we bring Gong Chansik in one piece, and that we take him in the least threatening way possible. That means no brute force or chloroform."
"What? That's-- I-- what." Sunwoo shoves the folder back into Junghwan's chest, the mere force of it pushing the other boy back by a few inches. "This is going to be one of the most boring assignments in the history of spyology. Seriously, what the fuck."
He stands up, arms across his chest. Junghwan is momentarily reminded of a kid throwing a tantrum, which is a ridiculous comparison considering that Sunwoo's upset over the fact that he wouldn't be killing anyone.
"Hey, don't let it get to you." Junghwan stands up, papers bunched in one arm. He puts his other arm around Sunwoo's shoulder in an attempt to cool down his partner. "If it'll make you feel better, we can go to the nearest dark alley and beat the crap out of some thugs."
Sunwoo gives him a skeptical look before a grin slowly creeps into his face. "Like you could even last a second in real combat."
"I can give moral support." Junghwan shrugs and adjusts his glasses. "Plus, I can pinpoint vital spots and concise trajectory."
Sunwoo's nose scrunches. "Nerd."
"I'm not the genius who came up with spyology, though."
Junghwan dodges a well-aimed punch to his windpipe, and for once, Sunwoo doesn't bother with a second attack.
*
Jinyoung, deeply concealed within the bushes where Sunwoo's soda can had rolled off moments ago, carefully stands up and watches as the two walk away. He produces a walkie-talkie from his belt and starts talking.
"As expected, they're going after Gong Chansik," Jinyoung says sternly. "we need to start planning a defense system, asap."
There is a moment of static-y silence before Dongwoo answers with an equally stern-sounding "Roger."
*
Gong Chansik decides to walk back home instead of taking the subway like he usually does. He also decides to take the long route, mainly because he just feels that today is a particularly good day.
He bites back a smile, thinking of how his parents would shower him with endless praise once he showed them his grades. All A's, just like he had promised his father, along with the hope that maybe, after showing him how smart of a son he really is, his father would finally let him chase his real dream of becoming an idol instead of pressuring him to become a scientist as well.
He huffs at the last thought, and instead daydreams of loyal fans cheering his name, staying at five-star hotels and wearing high-end wardrobe 24/7, making him completely oblivious to the fact that there was a dark, suspicious-looking car following him closely.
*
"Any ideas on how we're going to lure him in, genius?" Junghwan asks, drumming his fingers on his lap. "You were the one who insisted we get this over with as soon as possible, without, say, an actual plan in hand."
Sunwoo briefly glances at his partner before focusing back on the road, a smirk on his face. "Who says I didn't have a plan?"
"What're you talking about?" Junghwan's eyes narrow dangerously. He stops drumming his fingers, and instead begins to fidget uncomfortably.
"Let's just say I beat the information out of a couple of high school losers, which were, coincidentally, Chansik's friends." Sunwoo holds a hand up just as Junghwan's eyes grow three times bigger, a scandalized look on his face. "Look, the last thing we need to do is argue, because I'm really not in the mood to break your nose. So just shut up and listen to the information I have, alright? And quit with your fidgeting; it's distracting."
*
And as Chansik was oblivious to the fact that he was seconds away from being abducted, the same went for Sunwoo and Junghwan, both busy bickering to notice that another, yet notably sleeker car was currently hot on their trail.
"This Chansik boy... they're not supposed to hurt him, correct?" Dongwoo inquires, a firm grip on the steering wheel.
"Yes." Jinyoung gives a curt nod. His eyes never leave the car in front of them. "Which is why I'm interested in the outcome of all of this, because as far as I know, 'hurting' is this duo's specialty, particularly the one called 'Baro'."
"Right," Dongwoo says, unimpressed. "Well, as far as I know, he doesn't even have a gun, and I do, so."
Jinyoung pretends not to hear the condescending tone in his voice.
*
Chansik is in the middle of a daydream, one where he's stepping down his private jet, screaming, adoring fans and blinding camera flashes greeting him everywhere when a car behind him suddenly honks, instantly knocking him out of his reverie.
He turns around, half enraged and half bewildered, and at that same moment one of the heavily tinted windows roll down. A boy with a perky smile peers out to face Chansik.
"Hi!" the boy greets all-too excitedly. He gives a dramatic pause before continuing. "Gong Chansik, right?"
Chansik blinks and debates whether or not to acknowledge the question, but in the end, he decides to make a run for it. His parents, his father especially, had always reminded him to never, ever talk to strangers, no matter what--
"H-hey! Wait! I... I'm from-- from the agency!"
Chansik freezes. Agency?
"Yeah, you heard him." another voice says, and in spite of himself, Chansik looks back. Another boy has his head stuck out from the driver's side of the car, looking intently at him. "We're from this agency... a talent agency, and we've had our eye on you for a while."
Chansik's heart skips a beat. Even though this seems all too improbable, he carefully takes a few takes back towards the two boys and their big, shiny car.
"That's right, come closer..." Sunwoo murmurs, much like a predator waiting for the right time to strike. Junghwan steps on his foot.
"This... this isn't a scam, is it?" Chansik says once he's in a safe, but conversation-friendly distance from the two. His voice is shaky, but from uncertainty or excitement, none of them are sure.
"Scam? Us?" the driver scoffs, exaggerating on the word 'scam'. "We're the real deal, kiddo!"
Junghwan panics as he sees Chansik's eyes cross suspiciously.
"Er, here's our card!" he extends a hand out quickly, and Chansik reluctantly takes it, eyes scanning the card. "So as you can see, we've handled big names like Yoon Eunhye, Jang Geunseok and Kim Jaejoong--"
"No way!" Chansik gasps, jaw agape. "Jaejoong? The Kim Jaejoong? Are you serious--"
"Yeah, totally." Sunwoo pipes in. "I once had lunch with him in this five-star hotel. You know, just regular chitchat with lobster and live opera. The works."
"Wow." Chansik breathes, tightly clutching the card. His eyes glaze over at the prospect of good food and Italian music. But somewhere, in a tiny part of his brain, the rational Chansik nags at him, listing off his responsibilities and priorities in life.
He ignores all of it, of course.
"So, Chansik, what say you?"
Chansik stares at the card in his hand, then up at the two eager, beaming boys.
"Where do I sign up?" he asks, a radiant smile on his face.
*
"They're catching up on him." Jinyoung tenses up, his eyes alert. He watches as one of the spies, 'Sandeul', talks to Chansik animatedly. The boy doesn't reply and turns away instead, already sprinting off to a run.
"What is going on..." Dongwoo parks the car from a good distance away. His frown furrows even more when he sees the other spy, 'Baro', peer his head out from the car as well.
They watch as Chansik slowly walks back and exchanges a few words with the two spies, until Junghwan hands something to the boy.
"A card?" Jinyoung squints his eyes, leaning forward. "What exactly are they planning to do?"
"What are we supposed to do?" Dongwoo says, hand automatically going to his holster. Jinyoung holds him down with a glare.
"Not yet, not until--"
"Shit, Jinyoung." his partner cuts him off, and Jinyoung feels the blood drain from his face as he watches Chansik jump into his captors' car with a wide, pleased smile.
*
"It's nice to finally have another promising talent under our wing." Sunwoo grins, looking at Chansik through the rearview mirror. "I'm Baro, and this here is Sandeul." he motions to Junghwan, who flashes a weak smile.
"This is so exciting!" Chansik looks around, running his hand through the plush leather seats. "This is such a nice car. I hope I get one too someday!
"And by the way, can't we stop over my house for second? I want to change my clothes first. My school uniform makes me look so unflattering, especially around the butt area."
Junghwan's eyes flick to Sunwoo's, as if to say What now?
"As far as I can see, you look superb." Sunwoo remarks, his eyes on Chansik.
"You can't even see me past the waist."
"Well, wanna stop over and let me have a look-see then?" Sunwoo winks.
Junghwan makes a gagging noise. Chansik feels a strange heat prickling his face and looks away.
"Um, actually Chansik, what Baro's trying to say is that--"
Junghwan doesn't continue, not when he spots another dark car closely trailing behind them. "Baro," he calls through gritted teeth. "Baro."
Sunwoo raises an eyebrow at him, eyes leaving the road. Junghwan gestures to his side view mirror, and he feels his heart lurch.
"What are we supposed to do now?" Junghwan clutches his hands tightly. "I made it certain that the people from the Other Agency would never-- I-- were my calculations off? I don't understand..."
Behind them, Chansik tilts his head. "Are you guys okay over there?"
"No," Sunwoo replies a beat too late. "It... it seems like we're way behind schedule. I need to drive faster. The fastest I can, you understand, Chansik?"
Chansik slowly nods, confused and suddenly unsure.
"Okay, fasten your seatbelt and hold on to whatever you can." Junghwan says, looking and sounding much too nervous for Chansik's liking. He's barely secured the belt around his waist when the car lurches forward, Sunwoo's knuckles turning white as he maneuvers the steering wheel tightly.
"Fuck," he hears Sunwoo curse, and he wishes that somehow, he had paid a little more attention to rational Chansik.
*
End
Author: flusteredmess
Rating: PG
Pairing/Focus: B1A4 as spies ;;
A/N: I've wanted to write spy!B1A4 since forever. Hopefully this doesn't fail too much. /o/
"So who are we killing now?" Sunwoo asks casually, soda can in hand. He takes a deep gulp just as Junghwan coughs and sputters orange juice all over the folder on his lap.
"You can't just say that in public." Junghwan looks around the nearly deserted park nervously before he leans dangerously close to Sunwoo's face. "What if people from the Other Agency are tuning in on us right this moment? What then?"
Sunwoo makes a face, shrugs, and aims for the trash can a few feet away from their bench. He misses, and they both watch the can roll away into the nearest bush.
"The Boss is never going to give you an official gun at this rate."
"Shut up." Sunwoo frowns, looking genuinely hurt. He snatches the folder from Junghwan and ignores the latter's cries of protest. "I still have a lot of options anyway; flamethrowers, chainsaws, bazookas--"
His frown grows deeper as he holds up a picture of a boy clad in a school uniform, a bright smile on his face. Sunwoo reckons that they're around the same age.
He turns to Junghwan, head cocked and a curious expression on his face.
"We're going after a high schooler?"
There's a pause before Junghwan answers. "Well, yeah. Apparently his dad is some big-time scientist who's working with the government. The rest of the information is a bit murky -- you know how it is with The Boss -- but rest assured that we're doing this for a better cause."
"Hm." Sunwoo replies, eyes scanning the papers that held the basics about their next target. "Gong Chansik," he reads aloud, "181 cm, 63 kg, born on 14th of August... you know, I don't exactly get why they even bother giving us all this useless information. I mean, we're just going to end up killing the guy anyway."
"Yeah, about that..." Junghwan says. "The Boss strongly ordered that we bring Gong Chansik in one piece, and that we take him in the least threatening way possible. That means no brute force or chloroform."
"What? That's-- I-- what." Sunwoo shoves the folder back into Junghwan's chest, the mere force of it pushing the other boy back by a few inches. "This is going to be one of the most boring assignments in the history of spyology. Seriously, what the fuck."
He stands up, arms across his chest. Junghwan is momentarily reminded of a kid throwing a tantrum, which is a ridiculous comparison considering that Sunwoo's upset over the fact that he wouldn't be killing anyone.
"Hey, don't let it get to you." Junghwan stands up, papers bunched in one arm. He puts his other arm around Sunwoo's shoulder in an attempt to cool down his partner. "If it'll make you feel better, we can go to the nearest dark alley and beat the crap out of some thugs."
Sunwoo gives him a skeptical look before a grin slowly creeps into his face. "Like you could even last a second in real combat."
"I can give moral support." Junghwan shrugs and adjusts his glasses. "Plus, I can pinpoint vital spots and concise trajectory."
Sunwoo's nose scrunches. "Nerd."
"I'm not the genius who came up with spyology, though."
Junghwan dodges a well-aimed punch to his windpipe, and for once, Sunwoo doesn't bother with a second attack.
*
Jinyoung, deeply concealed within the bushes where Sunwoo's soda can had rolled off moments ago, carefully stands up and watches as the two walk away. He produces a walkie-talkie from his belt and starts talking.
"As expected, they're going after Gong Chansik," Jinyoung says sternly. "we need to start planning a defense system, asap."
There is a moment of static-y silence before Dongwoo answers with an equally stern-sounding "Roger."
*
Gong Chansik decides to walk back home instead of taking the subway like he usually does. He also decides to take the long route, mainly because he just feels that today is a particularly good day.
He bites back a smile, thinking of how his parents would shower him with endless praise once he showed them his grades. All A's, just like he had promised his father, along with the hope that maybe, after showing him how smart of a son he really is, his father would finally let him chase his real dream of becoming an idol instead of pressuring him to become a scientist as well.
He huffs at the last thought, and instead daydreams of loyal fans cheering his name, staying at five-star hotels and wearing high-end wardrobe 24/7, making him completely oblivious to the fact that there was a dark, suspicious-looking car following him closely.
*
"Any ideas on how we're going to lure him in, genius?" Junghwan asks, drumming his fingers on his lap. "You were the one who insisted we get this over with as soon as possible, without, say, an actual plan in hand."
Sunwoo briefly glances at his partner before focusing back on the road, a smirk on his face. "Who says I didn't have a plan?"
"What're you talking about?" Junghwan's eyes narrow dangerously. He stops drumming his fingers, and instead begins to fidget uncomfortably.
"Let's just say I beat the information out of a couple of high school losers, which were, coincidentally, Chansik's friends." Sunwoo holds a hand up just as Junghwan's eyes grow three times bigger, a scandalized look on his face. "Look, the last thing we need to do is argue, because I'm really not in the mood to break your nose. So just shut up and listen to the information I have, alright? And quit with your fidgeting; it's distracting."
*
And as Chansik was oblivious to the fact that he was seconds away from being abducted, the same went for Sunwoo and Junghwan, both busy bickering to notice that another, yet notably sleeker car was currently hot on their trail.
"This Chansik boy... they're not supposed to hurt him, correct?" Dongwoo inquires, a firm grip on the steering wheel.
"Yes." Jinyoung gives a curt nod. His eyes never leave the car in front of them. "Which is why I'm interested in the outcome of all of this, because as far as I know, 'hurting' is this duo's specialty, particularly the one called 'Baro'."
"Right," Dongwoo says, unimpressed. "Well, as far as I know, he doesn't even have a gun, and I do, so."
Jinyoung pretends not to hear the condescending tone in his voice.
*
Chansik is in the middle of a daydream, one where he's stepping down his private jet, screaming, adoring fans and blinding camera flashes greeting him everywhere when a car behind him suddenly honks, instantly knocking him out of his reverie.
He turns around, half enraged and half bewildered, and at that same moment one of the heavily tinted windows roll down. A boy with a perky smile peers out to face Chansik.
"Hi!" the boy greets all-too excitedly. He gives a dramatic pause before continuing. "Gong Chansik, right?"
Chansik blinks and debates whether or not to acknowledge the question, but in the end, he decides to make a run for it. His parents, his father especially, had always reminded him to never, ever talk to strangers, no matter what--
"H-hey! Wait! I... I'm from-- from the agency!"
Chansik freezes. Agency?
"Yeah, you heard him." another voice says, and in spite of himself, Chansik looks back. Another boy has his head stuck out from the driver's side of the car, looking intently at him. "We're from this agency... a talent agency, and we've had our eye on you for a while."
Chansik's heart skips a beat. Even though this seems all too improbable, he carefully takes a few takes back towards the two boys and their big, shiny car.
"That's right, come closer..." Sunwoo murmurs, much like a predator waiting for the right time to strike. Junghwan steps on his foot.
"This... this isn't a scam, is it?" Chansik says once he's in a safe, but conversation-friendly distance from the two. His voice is shaky, but from uncertainty or excitement, none of them are sure.
"Scam? Us?" the driver scoffs, exaggerating on the word 'scam'. "We're the real deal, kiddo!"
Junghwan panics as he sees Chansik's eyes cross suspiciously.
"Er, here's our card!" he extends a hand out quickly, and Chansik reluctantly takes it, eyes scanning the card. "So as you can see, we've handled big names like Yoon Eunhye, Jang Geunseok and Kim Jaejoong--"
"No way!" Chansik gasps, jaw agape. "Jaejoong? The Kim Jaejoong? Are you serious--"
"Yeah, totally." Sunwoo pipes in. "I once had lunch with him in this five-star hotel. You know, just regular chitchat with lobster and live opera. The works."
"Wow." Chansik breathes, tightly clutching the card. His eyes glaze over at the prospect of good food and Italian music. But somewhere, in a tiny part of his brain, the rational Chansik nags at him, listing off his responsibilities and priorities in life.
He ignores all of it, of course.
"So, Chansik, what say you?"
Chansik stares at the card in his hand, then up at the two eager, beaming boys.
"Where do I sign up?" he asks, a radiant smile on his face.
*
"They're catching up on him." Jinyoung tenses up, his eyes alert. He watches as one of the spies, 'Sandeul', talks to Chansik animatedly. The boy doesn't reply and turns away instead, already sprinting off to a run.
"What is going on..." Dongwoo parks the car from a good distance away. His frown furrows even more when he sees the other spy, 'Baro', peer his head out from the car as well.
They watch as Chansik slowly walks back and exchanges a few words with the two spies, until Junghwan hands something to the boy.
"A card?" Jinyoung squints his eyes, leaning forward. "What exactly are they planning to do?"
"What are we supposed to do?" Dongwoo says, hand automatically going to his holster. Jinyoung holds him down with a glare.
"Not yet, not until--"
"Shit, Jinyoung." his partner cuts him off, and Jinyoung feels the blood drain from his face as he watches Chansik jump into his captors' car with a wide, pleased smile.
*
"It's nice to finally have another promising talent under our wing." Sunwoo grins, looking at Chansik through the rearview mirror. "I'm Baro, and this here is Sandeul." he motions to Junghwan, who flashes a weak smile.
"This is so exciting!" Chansik looks around, running his hand through the plush leather seats. "This is such a nice car. I hope I get one too someday!
"And by the way, can't we stop over my house for second? I want to change my clothes first. My school uniform makes me look so unflattering, especially around the butt area."
Junghwan's eyes flick to Sunwoo's, as if to say What now?
"As far as I can see, you look superb." Sunwoo remarks, his eyes on Chansik.
"You can't even see me past the waist."
"Well, wanna stop over and let me have a look-see then?" Sunwoo winks.
Junghwan makes a gagging noise. Chansik feels a strange heat prickling his face and looks away.
"Um, actually Chansik, what Baro's trying to say is that--"
Junghwan doesn't continue, not when he spots another dark car closely trailing behind them. "Baro," he calls through gritted teeth. "Baro."
Sunwoo raises an eyebrow at him, eyes leaving the road. Junghwan gestures to his side view mirror, and he feels his heart lurch.
"What are we supposed to do now?" Junghwan clutches his hands tightly. "I made it certain that the people from the Other Agency would never-- I-- were my calculations off? I don't understand..."
Behind them, Chansik tilts his head. "Are you guys okay over there?"
"No," Sunwoo replies a beat too late. "It... it seems like we're way behind schedule. I need to drive faster. The fastest I can, you understand, Chansik?"
Chansik slowly nods, confused and suddenly unsure.
"Okay, fasten your seatbelt and hold on to whatever you can." Junghwan says, looking and sounding much too nervous for Chansik's liking. He's barely secured the belt around his waist when the car lurches forward, Sunwoo's knuckles turning white as he maneuvers the steering wheel tightly.
"Fuck," he hears Sunwoo curse, and he wishes that somehow, he had paid a little more attention to rational Chansik.
*
End