resentment and the (un)steady conscience
yesterday i got to see kids on bikes fighting against the 25-30 mph gusts that have been blowing across boston. i laughed inside. and outside.
on a related note, i fell off my bike last night in a period of excessive drunkenness.
well, it was more like this: i was biking up a hill against the wind, getting progressively and painfully slower and slower until i realized, "i'm not gonna make it." so i was pedaling fruitlessly, coming to an almost complete stop until i was forced to "abandon ship," if you will, and jump off. i was alright, the bike clattered down against the asphalt. oh well.
not that many of you care probably about my bike-centric entries, but here's some interesting imagery for you: me, slowly biking up a giant-ass hill against the wind with three 40z in my bag. (this was prior to the falling episode, conclusion - there are too many hills and too much wind in boston.)
as far as my life in general goes, i'm not depressed. (aside from the events of tuesday, which are ultimately unsurprising and ultimately confirm the fact that i'm afraid of the majority of our population. we elect a lying, deceitful, closed-minded war-monger [..again?] so the people speak.) but yes, i've been very curious as to why i've had a string of such happy-minded days and this curiousness was itself puzzling. so i decided to just go with it. i'm fine here, bad things will end. i think looking at the big picture has really brightened my outlook; i feel some sense of security for the future. maybe self-respect plays a part. i don't see myself fucking shit up too too badly. i'm just waiting to get to that "real life" part of life where i find out what really happens. hopefully it won't be too huge of a disappointment.
anyway, i'm happy with my friends and such; generally okay with myself, though i would like to get a bit more sweet sweet ass, but whatever.
on a related note, i fell off my bike last night in a period of excessive drunkenness.
well, it was more like this: i was biking up a hill against the wind, getting progressively and painfully slower and slower until i realized, "i'm not gonna make it." so i was pedaling fruitlessly, coming to an almost complete stop until i was forced to "abandon ship," if you will, and jump off. i was alright, the bike clattered down against the asphalt. oh well.
not that many of you care probably about my bike-centric entries, but here's some interesting imagery for you: me, slowly biking up a giant-ass hill against the wind with three 40z in my bag. (this was prior to the falling episode, conclusion - there are too many hills and too much wind in boston.)
as far as my life in general goes, i'm not depressed. (aside from the events of tuesday, which are ultimately unsurprising and ultimately confirm the fact that i'm afraid of the majority of our population. we elect a lying, deceitful, closed-minded war-monger [..again?] so the people speak.) but yes, i've been very curious as to why i've had a string of such happy-minded days and this curiousness was itself puzzling. so i decided to just go with it. i'm fine here, bad things will end. i think looking at the big picture has really brightened my outlook; i feel some sense of security for the future. maybe self-respect plays a part. i don't see myself fucking shit up too too badly. i'm just waiting to get to that "real life" part of life where i find out what really happens. hopefully it won't be too huge of a disappointment.
anyway, i'm happy with my friends and such; generally okay with myself, though i would like to get a bit more sweet sweet ass, but whatever.