Jobs/Housing/Roommates/Family Drama/Romance
So I just finished my first week at Earthlink. It's nothing like what I learned in college. Granted, I expected that, but I still feel like a babe in the woods. My head is kind of swimming with everything I'm going to have to learn. Considering all the time and energy getting my degrees took, I hope I at least have a steep learning curve. The alternative is that I'm going to reak at this job and either get fired or have to leave, so I hope that's not the case.
Most of this week was spent shadowing my giant supervisor. It's indescribable to have a boss you stand eye to shoulder with. I wonder if this is how my short friends feel. Then again, they're probably used to it.
I'll get great benefits (401K, covered commuting expense, health benefits). However, they're yet to contact me and let me know how to actually obtain these benefits. I did ask about getting my commuting expenses paid, and they basically said to wait. I'm being processed; I hope it doesn't take too long.
I'm renting a room out of a condo less than two miles north of where I work. My roommate is a Tech graduate who competes in triathalons and designs toys for disabled children. Things are working out really well for us. We both do our own thing and don't get in each other's way. I'm happy with this situation. It's cooler than the dorms. I have company and my own space at the same time. Space is limited, especially in the kitchen. My bedroom has regressed to a dorm room-like living quarters. I brought my mini fridge and I use my extra closet space as a pantry. My meals are limited by what's easy to make and clean up (lots of sandwiches, Chex-Mix, fruit, etc.). I'll eat plain bread for breakfast along with a couple of bananas and a Pop-Tart. It makes me miss the dining halls.
Sister is getting remarried this July. He's an engineer with two young boys (ages 8 & 10). Dad is upset. Well, he's actually just worried sick. Sister is the trustee of a trust Mom and Dad set up, and Dad is worried what may happen once this new guy finds out this fact. Dad won't talk about it because of his grief.
I think this is another one of her obtuse decisions that's going to make her life worse. Ever since college, she's wants so bad to get out of a current situation, that she can't see that she's making a bad choice. After she got divorced, she was happy to get away from her own two kids, so why she would think she could handle four. Well, two four half of the week, and four for the other half.
It seems at any given point in their lives either my brother or sister was pulling some stunt to aggravate Mom and Dad. Dad is really attached to me, and I'm sick of being the golden child. Not that I want to go out and make stupid choices, but I want to travel, move around (possibly out to Utah), be on my own. Even since I've moved out, Dad expects me to come home on the weekends. I want to have my own life, but I don't want to hurt my father. My choices right now are to either go home and neglect what I need to become an independent adult, or stay here and feel ravaged with guilt.
After all, my initial plan was to work in the city for a couple of years, then go start my adventure with the [CENSOR]. Among other reasons, I can't imagine moving away and leaving my Dad to wallow in loneliness. Loneliness is excrutiating, and the thought that I would subject my Dad to that makes me sick. Of course, I realize my siblings are more guilty than I am, and they're the ones who have ultimately put me in this position, but I have to make my choices based on my actual options, not what should be.
I've got a dinner date with a very attractive woman tomorrow night. Her name is Stephanie and she works as an accountant for a large, well-known corporation. Interestingly enough, we both went to the same university and even went to rival high schools. Did I mention she's hot. Seriously, if you were to see us out together, it'd take you a few minutes to realize she was with me. You'd be more inclined to guess she was my sister/cousin/platonic friend in stead of an actual date.
This is the other thing that makes the thought of leaving difficult. Granted, it's only one date, but I'm worried what will happen if we hit it off. I'll be sorely tempted to forego my adventurous plans in leu of having some one to curl up with. Perhaps I should just be myself...that seems to work very well for keeping myself single.