Comments | fonda5150: The Trouble With Teens - Part 2, or "Who are you and what have you done with my child?"

fonda5150

The Trouble With Teens - Part 2, or "Who are you and what have you done with my child?"

Sep 13, 2006 15:29

I would have to guess that since the dawn of time, just about everyone who has entered into parenthood has complained about never truly being prepared for the job. I imagine that Cro-Magnon man had considerable tribulations trying to keep their children from wandering out and being eaten by cave bears. I’m sure that parents in the dark ages spent ( Read more... )

Comments 46

tearingpassion September 14 2006, 00:57:59 UTC

Heh. Excuse me while i look at this from a 22 year olds point of view. When i was 13 i told my mother i didnt believe in God and that i was Wiccan. That didnt go over well with her. I was told it was a phase and that it was evil and i would get over it. Well, here i am, almost 10 years later, still practicing Wicca and happier than ever with my choice in religion. Wehn i was 15 i told my mother i wanted a tatoo. She told me i could have one when i was old enough to get one myself. I thought that was a fair compromise. When i was 16 i went to Greece on a school trip. In Greece there is no age restriction on getting a tattoo. I made my way to the closest one that had been recommended and along with 2 of my friends got the tattoo i had wanted for years. When i came home my mother was livid. I informed her that i did only what she said i could. I got told "that wasnt what i mean, but i guess i cant argue. just dont blame me when you are tired of it in 2 months." I still smile every time i look at it. It means a lot to me as its a symbol ( ... )

fonda5150 September 14 2006, 08:00:33 UTC

Thank you for your comment on this...I do appreciate hearing your view. I'm also glad you enjoyed the piece for it's entertainment value.

tearingpassion September 14 2006, 15:48:09 UTC

I'm glad you made some send out of my ramblings, but i think i figured out what i was trying to say in all my late night fever induced rambling. im pretty sure that what i was trying to say was that you shouldnt assume that everything is "just a phase" but at the same time your daughter should learn that sometimes its best to wait for the things you really want because you never really know what you're going to want in 2 months, nevermind 2 years.

But i do have a suggestion. Whenever people tell me they want a tattoo i tell them to draw what they want and put it somewhere that they will see it every day multiple times a day. leave it there for 2 years. if you still love it. go for it. so maybe you could get her a fake lip ring and then take a photo with it on and put it on her dresser or something. and if she still likes the way it looks when she turns 18 she can get a real one. just a suggestion.

fonda5150 September 14 2006, 16:46:23 UTC

This is a really good idea, especially with tatoos...

Deciding to get a tatoo is the easy part, but deciding what tatoo to get, wow. The picture idea is great.

Thread 7

serendipitous13 September 14 2006, 01:32:10 UTC

My mom had three "appearance rules" for her children while we were growing up.
1. Do what you want with your hair. It'll grow back.
2. No tattoos until you are 18.
3. No body piercings until you are out of the house.

It worked really well for all of us.

fonda5150 September 14 2006, 08:03:09 UTC

Sounds exactly like me...go mom!

on piercings dragonflylover September 14 2006, 01:45:33 UTC

When my daughter was 14, we allowed her to get her eyebrow pierced, color her hair, and the like. The battles we have faced are few and far between. She's almost 18 and the haircoloring phase is almost over, but her 14 year old brother is at the hair dying phased. He hasn't asked for piercing, other than having his ears pierced ( ... )

Re: on piercings fonda5150 September 14 2006, 08:05:26 UTC

"Pick your battles"

That's such good advice...and battles are personal things..we all have to decide which battles are important to us individually.

Re: on piercings dragonflylover September 14 2006, 18:48:42 UTC

yeah, I agree, battles are a personal thing. For me, it wasn't giving into my daughter, I just didn't think it was a big deal.

I also think that piercings may be more acceptable depending upon where you live. Here in the SF Bay Area, piercings aren't that big of a deal.

(btw, I could relate to what you wrote. Good job!)

Re: on piercings dragonflylover September 14 2006, 18:51:20 UTC

baggyk September 14 2006, 03:49:17 UTC

I would be more worried if my kid started buying Lacoste sweaters and looking like she was about to make a trip to the country club.

fonda5150 September 14 2006, 08:12:18 UTC

Hahahaha...cool

eat_a_rainbow September 14 2006, 04:07:27 UTC

I love your writing :) The only thing I'll say, from the viewpoint of both a teenager (19) and a mother, is that battles are to be chosen. If this one is important to you then that's understandable. I'm not saying anything about creativity or anything, because nowadays it's more "unique" to not have any piercings. However, I will say that SEVERAL of my friends and myself did self-piercings from 13-17 with safety pins at school, or needles in a bathroom. I've had many infections (yes, I know it was stupid.) and now have scarring. Thankfully I didn't want anything on my face. :) I did my bellybutton with a needle.

The piercing I've been telling my parents I wanted from the time I was 11 was my tounge. They said I had to wait or they would rip it out. At 12:01 on ym 18th birthday there was a needle going through my tounge. Just, since you've decided to not let her get it, PLEASE talk to her about self-piercings and how dangerous they can be.

and your goth-phase writing is hilarious. :)

fonda5150 September 14 2006, 08:17:56 UTC

Thank you for your advice...and self piercings truly do scare the hell out of me. I've already talked to her (and also my son) about it, and between the whole family (I actually have 4 kids) we've shared many horror stories (regarding their friends and others) on the topic.

My oldest son (now 20) keeps saying that he wants his tongue pierced but hasn't yet gone and had it done. He'll still be invited to Christmas dinner if he does...lol.