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“I think we deserved some time off today,” my mischievous grin clearly told Sweetie what I had on my mind. We’ve just finished family dinner, talked some more, put Ari to bed and the other two were upstairs doing who knows what. And Kat was out having fun.
“Not yet apparently,” her words erased my grin and made me pout. She smirked sadly glancing through the window outside. “Jesse and Nadene are coming.”
“When?” I asked and turned my head in the direction where she was looking at but saw nothing. Plus, I didn’t remember hearing anything about them coming over.
The doorbell rang.
“Right now,” Sweetie smirked as she passed me by and comfortingly brushed my cheek with her palm.
Don’t get me wrong but they didn’t quite choose the best of all moments to show their faces at my house. It’s just that I had very different plans how to spend the night. And that included only two people, some wine, popcorn, bed and DVDs. Still, I managed a polite smile for my brother and his girlfriend. I knew Jesse will register it.
“Someone’s happy to see us, huh?” Jesse muttered to me under his breath as we hugged, looking at me apologetically.
“You’ll leave eventually,” I winked as we set down. Remembering something I found very amuzing my eyes remained on Jesse. “Anita complained you haven’t call her in a long time,” I said so full of himself grinning like Cheshire cat for the first time I finally wasn’t the one to whom such phrase is directed at.
“You waited for this chance for so long, huh?” Jesse opened the season of laughter.
Of course, I was waiting for this for way too long. It was always me who forgot to call or didn’t call as often as our mother had expected. And unfortunately for me, is was always Jesse who was reminding me to pick up the goddamn phone and call.
“Yep and I hope it’s not last,” I giggled not trying to hide my satisfaction and delight. Luckily Jesse, didn’t mind me having my few moments of fun. “So what’s new?”
“Well, lot of things,” Jesse and Nadene eschanged the look that was all too familiar to me. I witnessed that quite a few times and even once in my life I really managed to pull it off myself. Squinting my eyes suspiciously I glanced at Sweetie who caught registered the same exchange and lightly nodded.
“Can we guess?” I asked having lot of trouble to stop being so smug with myself.
“Ok, go,” Jesse nodded putting his hand in his pocket and pulling out something that he concealed in his palm.
“You’re returning me the money you borrowed?” I joked.
“Now, that’s the best joke ever,” Jesse agreed. “I don’t even know why he still refered to it as just a loan. Loans by definition are things that you take use and eventually return them. However, Jesse was taking a unique kind that he never even though about returning one day, let alone really tried to give it back. Not that I mind.
“Well, I guess we can put these back,”jesse said as he opened his palm and two simple silver wedding rings flashed in front of my eyes. He put one to Nadene’s ring finger and then put one on his. “There. Now you’re the first who know.”
When they both flashed a huge grins, eagerly expecting us to congratulate them, Sweetie and I got up, exchanging quick glance both knowing what we should do. We walked over to them with serious faces which confused them just enough for us to do our little show.
“We’re so sorry to hear about your loss of freedom,” I began.
“And sanity,” Sweetie added.
“Accept our deepest condolacence and sympathy,” the two of us said in nearly perfect unison failing not to giggle. Only then they laughed and let us hug them and truly and properly congratulate them.
“For a moment I thought you were serious,” Nadene said with relief. “But definitively you made it memorable.”
Sure, we did. We discussed it many times before and joked in our own twisted world that we should try it out with the first victims that come our way. It simply just clicked for those victims to be my brother and his girlfriend.
“Guys, we’d like you two to be our best well, best people, you on my side, you on hers,” Jesse said hoping we’ll accept.
“Really?” I was truly surprised and honoured. When Jesse and Nadene nodded I couldn’t hide my excitement any more. This time I hugged them harder. “Wow, I’m going to be best man,” I amused myself. “Wow. And what am I exactly supposed to do?” then the realization that I might have some duties hit me.
“Give us the rings and sign as one of the witnesses,” Nadene explained.
“Oh, good.”
“You think you can manage that? It’s not too complicated for you?” Jesse teased.
“But you can’t draw heartagram, love,” Sweetie joined his joke. “You actually have to use your full name,” she said with a grin.
“I count you’ll remind me of it,” I added squeezing her hand with a smile.
“I have to otherwise you’ll annulate their marriage,” she pointed out and we all giggled a little.
“Oh, please don’t do that,” Nadene playfully begged. “It would suck big time trying to pull off the perfect wedding then find out later that I have to go through it again.”
“Ok, now, when, where and all those little things, Talk,” Sweetie instructed.
It’s not that Sweetie was really interested but she was willing to dedicate her time and to be attentive to make Nadene and possibly Jesse happy.
“Well, we don’t know all yet, since I believe our budget is small…”
“No,” I shook my head and cut Nadene off. “We’ll take care of all the expenses. You just concentrate to make it perfect for yourselves.”
“Ville…”
“Don’t argue with me,” I made Jesse shut up. “You never won before and surely you won’t now.”
“Oh, and when he says the wedding he’s also thinking about the honeymoon, right?” Sweetie briefly glanced at me and I nodded.
“All inclusive,” I assured them.
That was a bit over the top for the two of them. I’m very positive Jesse could have guessed we’ll help them have that best day of their life made memorable but being this gallant about it was probably unexpected.
Ever since my career with HIM began to provide me with a bit more than to pay for my drinks and bills, I was every now and then enjoying the role of big brother who every now and then tucks a few bucks into his little bro’s hand. But I was always careful about it. Especially while he was with Jonna’s friend. It proved to be one of the smartest things I had ever did in my life. I can’t say that back in those days when none of our relationships was going well, I was secretly rejoicing listening to Jesse’s retelling of their fights over money. That projection and transfer of your own life and problems to someone else can be very therapeuthic experience. Every time my borhter would win a fight I was feeling proud of myself like it was me winning fight with Jonna. I’m sure I’ll tell all this one day to Jesse but for now I’ll let him enjoy his life.
When Nadene said she doesn’t know which venue would be appropriate, Sweetie suggested ice church. Then Nadene, still a bit fan-girlish at certain moments asked if that’s where Sweetie would like to get married.
“Yeah,” my darling nodded and no one but me noticed that faster than light curving of her lips secretly saying that’s not a complete truth.
“Ok, now tell me,” I insisted just for the sake of tease her later in the bed that night. “Maybe they swallowed that ice church crap but I’m not buying it.
She giggled readjusting herself in my arms, putting her hands on my chest creating a little distance,
“Temppeliaukio Kirkko.”
My lips widen in smile as I leaned to press my lips on hers. It made all the sense. We went there only once and believe it or not we sit through performance of Mozart’s Requiem. One and only classical piece she truly liked in whatever form or performance. It’s funny how sometimes it takes a stranger to take some local resident like me to discover such a wonderful place in your own home town. When I only remember that perfect acoustic and the sound of instruments and choir united, intertwining like they’re making love. Yes, I was never fan of classical music but that one piece I heard was simmering with perfection and opened my eyes in new way.
It’s the moment I realized that my darling has music in her that she’s not even aware of. Her music comes in words combined into sentences. Maybe that’s why when I’m reading her work of art there’s always a soundtrack playing in my head. Her every word holds a sound, a tone and triggers memories or creates new ones.
Watching her face in that Rock Church, emotions that played on her face through out entire performance I knew she was traveling places she has never seen elsewhere but in her mind. God, I envied her freedom, noninhibition that allowed her to shut off the world around her no matter where she was, how many eyes looked at her and let her heart guide her. There were tears in her glistering eyes, kissing her lashes goodbye. Her tears never rolled down her cheeks fast; always travel in slow motion like they themselves can’t let go of such beauty, then how could ever I? But that moment there, all my eyes had for her is utter awe. She always claims I wear my heart on my sleeve, sure she believes it, but she breathes her heart; she wears it like it’s her own skin.
After that concert, understanding her was much easier. I still believe that was her purpose for taking me there. There are always matter that escape the all words yet Sweetie always finds a way to tell you everything, to make you understand. Actions speak louder than words; she proves it for sure.
Even as a kid I believed we’re all born with music. During our life we’re trying to tune in, find the right frequency, the right scale, key, chord that we belong to, that we can play. Finding a partner that can tune in with me, that can hear the things I hear was my life’s quest. Maybe people will never understand my music, never really learn to appreciate it for what I’d like them to but it doesn’t matter. It never mattered, especially not now when I know that the woman I love sees it and feels it with my eyes. I realized that that day in the church. Before that she avoided to get into long discussions about music with me, justifying herself with incompetence of knowledge.
But that day I realized it’s all much more other truth. She just refuses to dissect melodies, makes comparisons, pick out bits and pieces in way I do. Especially if it’s music she likes. She takes every song as independent solemn whole. Closer introspection into songs she liked, knew by heart and often sang explained it all for me. All of them in my ears were examples of perfection in history of music. They all had the beginning, the end and the journey in between; they all leave you crave for more; they all don’t have a single tone that’s missing or that’s too much. What she wanted to tell me can only come to one. There’s nothing to discuss about perfection. You can only appreciate it. Good songs are open for discussion, carp isn’t worth commenting.
And that’s a whole life philosophy of Sweetheart summed up. Very simple, isn’t it? Yeah, right.