AVENGERS ASSEMBLE...AND MAKEOUT

[foxxcub]

Okay, so. With all the excitement that's been building over the last week or so, there seems to be an unreasonable amount of negativity coming along with it. And that just won't do! So here's what I propose:

♥an Avengers Kissing Meme♥

Comments

[jibrailis]

Tony and Steve are really bad at sex together, 1/2

Tony prides himself on being the sort of man to anticipate everything and not be fazed by any of it, which is true enough. He willingly spends hours in a locked room with Bruce, doesn't he, poking his ass with sharp objects when Bruce isn't paying attention. Even Bruce's proctologist isn't so willing. Tony is a brave, far-seeing man, no doubt about that, but even this catches him off guard.

He has sex with Captain America and it isn't very good.

"Okay, if we're going to be honest here--"

"I'd rather not be honest," Bruce mutters, tinkering over his algorothims on the other side of the lab. "I'd rather not talk about this at all."

"--I'd rate it maybe a two," Tony finishes. "It's not, like, impalement on rigid cock spears bad, but you know, Steve's limbs. They're very... they stand to attention in all the wrong ways

[jibrailis]

2/2Solution 1: Chereographed sex

[coffeebuddha]

\o/

All the hearts in all the eyes! ♥___&hearts

[foxxcub]

SCREAMING

NANCE, YOU WRITE THE BEST BAD SEX EVER

[pearljamz]

HAHAHA YESSSS

They are so bad in bed it's right
And Steve really seems to like checkers a lot. Cute!

[aliassmith]

XD XD XD

And oh god, poor Bruce!

[sometimesalways]

Nancy, you make my life better.

[cellia]

Hee! Perfect solution!

I adore this.

[lanyon]

This is officially the best ever. This wins the internet.

[sirona_gs]

OH. MY. GOD. NANCE. I AM RUNNING OUT OF CAPSLOCK HERE. AJDFHJFDKSHSKJGHFDLJGHG BEST. IDEA. EVER. <33333333333333

[51stcenturyfox]

All of the learns! <3

[fioletova]

Oh God, I absolutely love, love, love this!!! And poor Bruce :D

[pkai7]

<3 <3 I think this is the first fic I've read that Steve and Tony are bad in bed together.

Poor Bruce. <3

Get them to a bed and they turn from two of the most eligible bachelors in town, suave motherfuckers, into piles of limbs and flaily heads, like gymnasts with concussions.

hahaha. what a picture.

Still, Tony thinks, he'd rather get bruises with Steve than smooth skin and silky movement with anyone else.

LOL. You say the sweetest things, Tony. Ahh!! Why are you so precious, Tony??

Solution 5: Watching lots and lots of porn for tips.

"I feel like a pervert," Steve says sadly. "Do you want to make me feel like a pervert, Tony? Does that make you happy?"

HAHAHA. I was laughing so hard I had to put down my coffee.

He and Steve stare at each other across the bed.

"Nah, me neither," Tony says, and grabs Steve into a kiss.

So sweet. <3

So much love for this fic and you. <3

[davincis_girl]

so funny

[fireez]

This was hilarious and sweet. <3
I agree with Steve. They need lots and lots of practice, hehe.

[jlh]

hahahahaha crown me.

Tony's just more of a flashes of inspiration kind of guy, not a work hard and steady until you get there. But I think it's good for him, the same way Steve is.

And Bruce, yeah, sorry for the TMI, sciencebro.