MEMORY - 2
[The memory starts in a cave, illuminated with sunlight streaming in from behind, water dripping from the ceiling and a surprising lack of musty smell. Seven is holding an umbrella and a book and being carried piggy-back by a muscular boy with spiky blue hair. After a few moments of walking, the two of them come to a large cavern. Light streams in from the ceiling, illuminating a broadsword half buried in the stone floor.]
It seems as though we cannot go any further.
Hey... isn't that...
Hmmm... [He flips a few pages in the book, locates a drawing.] Looks right. The Holy Sword Excalibur!
[As if saying the name was some sort of trigger, the air thrums with energy.]
W-wow!
The air is vibrating... It seems like what the book says is true, that the one who acquires the Holy Sword will be called a hero and gain eternal glory. And look! The precise ornamentation, the way the blade doesn't even have one scratch! Beautiful! Truly it deserves to be called holy!
None other than the chosen hero can pull it out.
[The sword is possibly the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.]
I... I want it.
[Suddenly the other boy reaches out and yanks the blade from the ground, waving it around in over-zealous circles above his head.]
Yahoooo! I'm the hero!
[Seven flinches back in shock.]
What!?! That's impossible! There has to be something wrong! You're not fit to be complimented by being called "hero"!
[He stumbles over to the platform, head in his hands.]
Can't we do it over?
Ehhhh? What? It doesn't count?!?
Okay, fine. It'll be the same no matter how many times we do it!
... Let me go first this time.
No way, no way! The Holy Sword already chose me! Someone big like me is the only one who could use it!
[Seven can feel his heart pounding in his chest as he reaches out a hand to the hilt of the sword. Then suddenly he realizes something, and pulls a handkerchief out and wipes the handle down.]
There's no way of knowing who touched this before...
[A tug, and the sword comes out smoothly.]
... I pulled it out.
What the hell!?! The hole must have gotten bigger or something!
[Suddenly a booming voice fills the cave, and the sword tugs itself free from Seven's grip, floating in mid-air and glowing.]
You've come far, young ones! Sorry for the late introduction. I am the one called Excalibur!
[A bright flash of light and there's a... thing... standing between Seven and the blue-haired boy.
It's about three feet tall, pure white, with no discernible features other than a long snout and giant eyes, and inexplicably wearing a tophat, coat, and giant ruff, and carrying a hooked cane.]
Wow that looks dumb!
[Seven can't help but agree.]
You're the Holy Sword? You look so dumb!
[The blue-haired boy's pointing and laughing can't be a good idea, but Seven can't help sniggering at the absurd sight.]
I'll say the same to you! Who are you, looking like that? [The sword points his cane at the boy's face.]
Me? I'm Bla--- [He's cut off by Excalibur.]
My legend began in the twelfth century. ... you guys look like meisters. Where did you come from?
Don't point your cane at me like that! Obnoxoious--
We're from 死武専. [He can't quite understand the sound of the word.]
Oh yeah! [and it's Seven's turn to be cut off by the sword.] I'll show you something good!
Are you listening or what?
... what's with him? Hey! If you're gonna wear clothes, at least put on some pants!
... What is he planning on showing us?
[Excalibur turns around, swinging his cane at the blue-haired boy's face. The boy has to dodge to avoid being whacked in the head.] Do you want to hear the chronicles of my heroism?
Stop swinging that thing at me!
Do you want to hear about it?
Move the cane, bastard!
Where do you come from?
[The blue-haired boy is getting more and more and more angry with Excalibur every passing second, yelling and flailing.]
We already said we're from 死武専!
What's your favorite number, from one to twelve?
[... what?]
... one to twelve? ... It's one, of course! If I'm not number one, you'll be sorry!
Eight. It's eight!
Fools! You don't have the right to choose! My legend begins in the twelfth century.
Didn't you say pick the one we liked?!?!?
[Excalibur turns away.]
And what the hell is the legendary Holy Sword?!? What is this book? It didn't help at all! Who wrote this?!?!
[He picks the book up off the ground and stares at it for a bit, obviously having trouble with the words.]
Author... Excalibur?!?!
[He flings the book on the floor at the sword's feet, raging.]
IT WAS YOU!
I don't give autographs. [Excalibur points the cane dramatically, for emphasis.] Here.
[The Holy Sword thrusts two massive stacks of papers at the two boys, and Seven takes one. There's neat, careful writing covering each sheet, and extending onto the back.]
To become my meister, there are one thousand tasks you must complete! I collected them into these forms. Read over them carefully!
[And for the most part, Seven is reading them, as Excalibur starts listing tasks off by memory.
1 My mornings start off with a cup of coffee with cream.
The sword drones on, and Seven glances over the list.
57 Always place a dehumidifier in your room.
58 When I'm humming a tune to myself, you must not speak!
172 Seek harmony seek it thus.
202 The highest class toilet must be prepared.
667 Always praise Excalibur.
He can feel himself getting more and more and more annoyed as the creature prattles on.]
As for number 452, I hope you join me for my daily five-hour recitation session. I will then tell you the details of my legend.
Well! [He glows again, transforming back into his sword form.]
You two were chosen! Take in your hands victory and glory!
[They reach up together and grab onto the hilt of the sword.]
Then let's go! Together!
[The room shakes with energy, a white-hot glow of magic envelops them, Seven can feel the massive power of the Holy Sword running through him.
Then, as one, he and the other boy turn and stab the sword back in the ground it came from. Seven is twitching in anger.]
Stuuuuuuupid! Who's gonna do that with you?!?!
Disgusting!
[And the memory ends.]
It seems as though we cannot go any further.
Hey... isn't that...
Hmmm... [He flips a few pages in the book, locates a drawing.] Looks right. The Holy Sword Excalibur!
[As if saying the name was some sort of trigger, the air thrums with energy.]
W-wow!
The air is vibrating... It seems like what the book says is true, that the one who acquires the Holy Sword will be called a hero and gain eternal glory. And look! The precise ornamentation, the way the blade doesn't even have one scratch! Beautiful! Truly it deserves to be called holy!
None other than the chosen hero can pull it out.
[The sword is possibly the most beautiful thing he's ever seen.]
I... I want it.
[Suddenly the other boy reaches out and yanks the blade from the ground, waving it around in over-zealous circles above his head.]
Yahoooo! I'm the hero!
[Seven flinches back in shock.]
What!?! That's impossible! There has to be something wrong! You're not fit to be complimented by being called "hero"!
[He stumbles over to the platform, head in his hands.]
Can't we do it over?
Ehhhh? What? It doesn't count?!?
Okay, fine. It'll be the same no matter how many times we do it!
... Let me go first this time.
No way, no way! The Holy Sword already chose me! Someone big like me is the only one who could use it!
[Seven can feel his heart pounding in his chest as he reaches out a hand to the hilt of the sword. Then suddenly he realizes something, and pulls a handkerchief out and wipes the handle down.]
There's no way of knowing who touched this before...
[A tug, and the sword comes out smoothly.]
... I pulled it out.
What the hell!?! The hole must have gotten bigger or something!
[Suddenly a booming voice fills the cave, and the sword tugs itself free from Seven's grip, floating in mid-air and glowing.]
You've come far, young ones! Sorry for the late introduction. I am the one called Excalibur!
[A bright flash of light and there's a... thing... standing between Seven and the blue-haired boy.
It's about three feet tall, pure white, with no discernible features other than a long snout and giant eyes, and inexplicably wearing a tophat, coat, and giant ruff, and carrying a hooked cane.]
Wow that looks dumb!
[Seven can't help but agree.]
You're the Holy Sword? You look so dumb!
[The blue-haired boy's pointing and laughing can't be a good idea, but Seven can't help sniggering at the absurd sight.]
I'll say the same to you! Who are you, looking like that? [The sword points his cane at the boy's face.]
Me? I'm Bla--- [He's cut off by Excalibur.]
My legend began in the twelfth century. ... you guys look like meisters. Where did you come from?
Don't point your cane at me like that! Obnoxoious--
We're from 死武専. [He can't quite understand the sound of the word.]
Oh yeah! [and it's Seven's turn to be cut off by the sword.] I'll show you something good!
Are you listening or what?
... what's with him? Hey! If you're gonna wear clothes, at least put on some pants!
... What is he planning on showing us?
[Excalibur turns around, swinging his cane at the blue-haired boy's face. The boy has to dodge to avoid being whacked in the head.] Do you want to hear the chronicles of my heroism?
Stop swinging that thing at me!
Do you want to hear about it?
Move the cane, bastard!
Where do you come from?
[The blue-haired boy is getting more and more and more angry with Excalibur every passing second, yelling and flailing.]
We already said we're from 死武専!
What's your favorite number, from one to twelve?
[... what?]
... one to twelve? ... It's one, of course! If I'm not number one, you'll be sorry!
Eight. It's eight!
Fools! You don't have the right to choose! My legend begins in the twelfth century.
Didn't you say pick the one we liked?!?!?
[Excalibur turns away.]
And what the hell is the legendary Holy Sword?!? What is this book? It didn't help at all! Who wrote this?!?!
[He picks the book up off the ground and stares at it for a bit, obviously having trouble with the words.]
Author... Excalibur?!?!
[He flings the book on the floor at the sword's feet, raging.]
IT WAS YOU!
I don't give autographs. [Excalibur points the cane dramatically, for emphasis.] Here.
[The Holy Sword thrusts two massive stacks of papers at the two boys, and Seven takes one. There's neat, careful writing covering each sheet, and extending onto the back.]
To become my meister, there are one thousand tasks you must complete! I collected them into these forms. Read over them carefully!
[And for the most part, Seven is reading them, as Excalibur starts listing tasks off by memory.
1 My mornings start off with a cup of coffee with cream.
The sword drones on, and Seven glances over the list.
57 Always place a dehumidifier in your room.
58 When I'm humming a tune to myself, you must not speak!
172 Seek harmony seek it thus.
202 The highest class toilet must be prepared.
667 Always praise Excalibur.
He can feel himself getting more and more and more annoyed as the creature prattles on.]
As for number 452, I hope you join me for my daily five-hour recitation session. I will then tell you the details of my legend.
Well! [He glows again, transforming back into his sword form.]
You two were chosen! Take in your hands victory and glory!
[They reach up together and grab onto the hilt of the sword.]
Then let's go! Together!
[The room shakes with energy, a white-hot glow of magic envelops them, Seven can feel the massive power of the Holy Sword running through him.
Then, as one, he and the other boy turn and stab the sword back in the ground it came from. Seven is twitching in anger.]
Stuuuuuuupid! Who's gonna do that with you?!?!
Disgusting!
[And the memory ends.]