Thanks! The poor man never had a sick day in his life until he was 64, and got the cancer diagnosis. It is a very rare cancer, and obviously he is still with us, so = miracle. But, chemo wrecked him so he is not a surgical candidate for knee repair.
It is sad, and hard, but it is also a time to love him differently; is it?
My dad has taught me to talk openly about his death during this time. At first, it seemed macabre to me, but this has allowed me to embrace our time left. He is not sick, but he is 86 years old, and his death is a real possibility.
I treasure every moment with my parents. We had my grandmother until she passed, aged 99. The joy of ethnicity! We don't discuss mortality, unless he brings it up. Sometimes I fall into an anxiety spiral of wondering who will die first, but I snap out of it. I might be the one to die first, after all.
Much appreciated! It's sort of the time of life for that, since I am about 59? I hate to be a whiner in these days of rampant oversharing, but big solidarity for all of us to know that we are all in the same struggle.
~hugs~. My sister visited our paternal aunt shortly before her death, she lived across the country from us. She was 90 and in the throes of dementia. She didn't remember anyone. My sister introduced herself, and said, "Aunt, I'm your brother's youngest daughter!" and my aunt replied, "Oh, I had a brother?" Her next words were "I don't really know who you are, but I'm happy you came to see me."
That's the best response, really, that she wasn't threatened. We've visited so many people with dementia, and we explain who we are and just go on with the visit.
Oh, my! Any one of those things sounds like a lot to deal with, and having them all at once sounds incredibly disheartening and overwhelming. I hope you have people to lean on, whether that's friends, a spouse, or a good therapist. All three would be best!
Yeah, I turn 64 next month, and my parents are 88 and 89 years old, so I hear you about middle age. :-)
My parents have a lot of health problems, and I suggested that they move into a continuing care facility. Mom said, "Oh, we don't have time to deal with that now, because we're sick all the time. We'll have to do that after we get better." I don't think they're going to GET better at their ages, but it sounded as if she didn't want to hear that, so I didn't say it. So yeah, I do hear you...
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My dad has taught me to talk openly about his death during this time. At first, it seemed macabre to me, but this has allowed me to embrace our time left. He is not sick, but he is 86 years old, and his death is a real possibility.
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I wonder what he is really seeing. Brains are so complicated, and we know so little about them.
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Enjoy all the moments you can.
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Hugs and best wishes!
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My parents have a lot of health problems, and I suggested that they move into a continuing care facility. Mom said, "Oh, we don't have time to deal with that now, because we're sick all the time. We'll have to do that after we get better." I don't think they're going to GET better at their ages, but it sounded as if she didn't want to hear that, so I didn't say it. So yeah, I do hear you...
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