Wow, an update. Settle down people.
I know, I know, it's been a while. I have returned, however, with a brand new article, served up nice and piping hot, like a pizza from the oven. With extra pepperoni, fresh, melted che..um, just click the link.
They say you can learn a lot about a person by what is in their garbage. "They" in this case, being hobos; still it is a valid point. So, I have decided that, for this article, I will follow our hobo friends, and rifle through my garbage can; hopefully in the process teach you a little something about your author (me). It'll be fun, and perhaps a whee bit dirty. One can only hope.
First off, we have some discarded soda cans. Now, to the casual observer, this would make it seem as if I enjoy the occasional carbonated beverage, a refreshing drink after a long hard day of typing. In actuality, I just enjoy crushing the cans with my hand. Sure, the drinks themselves are fine, but don't you just feel powerful when you are able to BEND METAL?? I certainly do, and sometimes I'll stand in front of the mirror and do it, veins bulging, penis fully erect. But enough about that, onto the next piece of discard!
We have here an empty pack of Wrigley's™ strappleberry™ gum™ Oh, he likes gum? Lollers oral fixation, am I rite? HURRHURRDURR, NO, Freud, you are not "rite." I really just wanted to have an excuse to overuse the ™ symbol. Mission Accomplished! Next item!
Finally, we have, through my totally random and entirely unscripted selection process, two empty Netflix envelopes. Surely, such an upstanding citizen such as myself will have nothing but the finest cinema...wait...The Critic: The Full Series: Vol 1 and Babes in Space. Of course, this can only show that I am your typical horny male, and that I enjoy interstellar travel. (elohel didyaseewhatididthere)
Anyways, hope you enjoyed this little foray into my MIND. Now, if you are so inclined, go through your garbage and see what it says about you, and post it in a reply! It'll be fun! Of course, you can just chicken out and leave an ordinary comment like "whew, nice to see you finally update again" or "where's my money, punk." Those are examples, by the way; I KNOW a few of you chuckleheads have already typed "where's my mo" in the reply window, hehe.
They say you can learn a lot about a person by what is in their garbage. "They" in this case, being hobos; still it is a valid point. So, I have decided that, for this article, I will follow our hobo friends, and rifle through my garbage can; hopefully in the process teach you a little something about your author (me). It'll be fun, and perhaps a whee bit dirty. One can only hope.
First off, we have some discarded soda cans. Now, to the casual observer, this would make it seem as if I enjoy the occasional carbonated beverage, a refreshing drink after a long hard day of typing. In actuality, I just enjoy crushing the cans with my hand. Sure, the drinks themselves are fine, but don't you just feel powerful when you are able to BEND METAL?? I certainly do, and sometimes I'll stand in front of the mirror and do it, veins bulging, penis fully erect. But enough about that, onto the next piece of discard!
We have here an empty pack of Wrigley's™ strappleberry™ gum™ Oh, he likes gum? Lollers oral fixation, am I rite? HURRHURRDURR, NO, Freud, you are not "rite." I really just wanted to have an excuse to overuse the ™ symbol. Mission Accomplished! Next item!
Finally, we have, through my totally random and entirely unscripted selection process, two empty Netflix envelopes. Surely, such an upstanding citizen such as myself will have nothing but the finest cinema...wait...The Critic: The Full Series: Vol 1 and Babes in Space. Of course, this can only show that I am your typical horny male, and that I enjoy interstellar travel. (elohel didyaseewhatididthere)
Anyways, hope you enjoyed this little foray into my MIND. Now, if you are so inclined, go through your garbage and see what it says about you, and post it in a reply! It'll be fun! Of course, you can just chicken out and leave an ordinary comment like "whew, nice to see you finally update again" or "where's my money, punk." Those are examples, by the way; I KNOW a few of you chuckleheads have already typed "where's my mo" in the reply window, hehe.