And I know that you don't realize how much that I gave you
Andrew brought Super Steve and Brent to the beach--I've missed having him/his friends around =) We played Killer Bunnies for hours and just laughed with each other.
I felt sorry for my mom and how I've treated her in the past, it must be horrible to feel second-rate. Although I don't really do new year resolutions, I guess this year starts the trend. I decided I need to actively love and respect her more, and never make her feel unwanted.
I really, really, really love my dad. He couldn't be any more wonderful.
I saw Laura Haines today and we spent time just talking and laughing, putting together puzzles with Benjamin and tickling Elsie (she laughs and "talks" now!). Then we finished 1 Peter and reflected on the year and our time together and how we've been feeling. I can feel my whole mood change when I walk into her house, she has really blessed me with her wisdom and her friendship. I can't wait to bring Jess to see her next semester :)
I spent the rest of the afternoon with Jess-watching Mark Lowry's old band. I heard his comedy and thought it'd be fun to watch an old 90s VHS, buuut I didn't realize how twangy he sang. I won't say I'm upset though, it was great to talk to her before leaving.
I had a great time at Rachel's last night, reconnecting with the family and such. Rachel and I can laugh so much together, but we always end up having really engaging discussions about important things-politics, religion, relationships, whatever-it's so great to have that kind of a friendship. It feels so effortless, even though we see each other about 10 times a year!
The New Year's Eve party was fun, relaxed as always. Every year we turn on the tv too late to see the ball drop-it's almost like a tradition now :p As much as I looove being with my friends and just spending time together on New Years, I can't wait for Urbana next year. I've basically been counting down the days since the last retreat freshman year.
I really need to get serious about finding a job-I've got a lot to pay for over the next year. Oy!
So I'm starting to pack and really prepare for South Africa. It takes me a long time to process what I read by Desmond Tutu [No Future Without Forgiveness]. Hearing how the apartheid has changed South Africa, and how people are so willing to forgive, makes me feel so horrible about the way I live my life. I'm such a "go with the flow" person, and I always thought that was a GOOD thing. But what about the white people who just "went with the flow" and didn't try to stop the corruption and the atrocities that were happening because some people had a different skin tone? How many things am I passive about that are causing harm to lots of people-and I'm either too naive or too lazy to care?! I hope I can grow up a lot over the next few months and begin to take a stance for what I think is right-which will mean learning a lot more about pretty much everything.
I don't know where to begin packing. I don't want to over-pack, but it'd be far worse to not have everything I need! I'm just stressing myself out before starting, which is a duuumb idea.
Well, that was long, but the last one I'll do for a while =)
If you want to know what we're up to in South Africa, we'll be updating a blog every week.
There's nothing on it yet, buut here's the link: http://capetownsateam.blogspot.com/
Everything is happening so fast, but this break couldn't be going any better.