Disillusioned. Yep that pretty much says it. The pipe dreams have been breaking apart lately and i've been left with nothing more than cold iconoclastic reality. So many things have turned up to be less than I thought they were. School, people, God, me. Now I see that so much of what I thought was, was just fantasy projected on reality ( Read more... )

A lot has changed in the past year or so. I find myself almost unrecognizeable from the person I was a year ago. I used to sit around at home and play video games and watch movies and really not talk to people more than was necessary. I ventured out of the house only when I had to, or if I went running, by myself of course. I was deathly afraid ( Read more... )

For the first time in college, I wrote a paper that I'm proud of. If you want to read it, go for it.

Today was a really good day.

I walked out of my dorm this morning and it was snowing!! That's right, snowing ( Read more... )

I was just outside in the middle of the night in sub-40-degree weather for an hour. I'm thoroughly impressed with myself. And it was fun. I might not wear sandals next time though.

(it doesn't do sub-40 back home)
I'm really looking forward to fall break. I'm looking forward to a lot of people leaving and the clarity that (hopefully) will come ( Read more... )

This morning was top-notch awful.

Then I went to lunch and proceeded to take a nap on the quad for just over 4 hours. Then I ate diner. Could life get any better? I doubt it. I'm seriously considering just going straight back to bed now. At least until DSG tonight.

Since I don't watch TV anymore and don't read the newspaper I'm pretty disconnected from happenings around the world. I figure that I'll hear about anything that I need to know if it's important enough. I just heard about the shootings at the Amish school yesterday. At first I thought little of it. Shootings happen all the time, and sadly I've ( Read more... )

The past few days have been supremely overwhelming. I kind of feel like I'm riding a wave. In some ways it's not so much fun, because I'm keeping just ahead of all my obligations and stresses and affections and commitments and cares. Yet, in another sense, I feel like I'm being given just barely enough grace to get by in order that I'm kept ( Read more... )

I don't really have the time or energy to go into details about the past few days. Suffice it to say they've been wonderful. Wonderful in their difficulty as well as their joys. It never ceases to amaze me how God keeps me. Things are really piling up, and I was pretty much ready to kill something earlier today. I'm good now though. God and I ( Read more... )

Show me my inadequacy that I might see Your fullness.
Show me my weakness that I might wield Your strength.
Show me myself that I might look all the more intently at You.
Show me my depravity that I might live in You.