FM-challenge 25: Pet peeve
What is your biggest pet peeve?
Soccer.
Now before those of you who grew up in the world's more entertainment-challenged countries start going on about how, ohhh, it's the world's sport, and that I'm just an ugly American, and how I'm all pissed off because I bet a shitload of money on France. . .
Well, what's your point? Clearly, there's a fundamental flaw in any sport where I might even be tempted to bet on France, where someone I won't mention -- because I wouldn't want him to find out before I hunt him down and kill him -- told me Les Bleus were a sure thing. I am steadfastly ignoring the fact that Wesley told me England would win it all, and they still haven't lost. Of course, the game was a very exciting 1 to 1 tie, as they so often have in this sport. Almost as good as the zero to zero ties.
Give me a good demon-gladiator fight to bet on, any day.
But this rant isn't just about how much I hate the nation of France. It's about how much I hate the sport of soccer, not just because it's about as interesting as watching grass grow, but because every four years, Americans can expect to be lectured about how we don't have a proper appreciation for the poetry of the game -- which I suppose applies if "poetry" is what you call the slogans that English skinheads recite while they are beating the crap out of anybody who happens to be in their way. Now, admittedly, soccer is the only sport I know to have started a war, and for that alone, my former employers liked to pump as much money as possible into the Fédération Internationale de Football Association (and seriously, WTF is with that acronym? Something else to blame the French for). But keep your moralizing and your kickball to yourself, thanks.
Did I mention that I had George Mason in the Final Four? Hell, I got George Mason into the Final Four. There may have been ritual sacrifice involved. I'm still dining out on my bracket money. Now basketball, that's a sport.
Mavs in six.
Also, David Beckham is a pussy.
Soccer.
Now before those of you who grew up in the world's more entertainment-challenged countries start going on about how, ohhh, it's the world's sport, and that I'm just an ugly American, and how I'm all pissed off because I bet a shitload of money on France. . .
Well, what's your point? Clearly, there's a fundamental flaw in any sport where I might even be tempted to bet on France, where someone I won't mention -- because I wouldn't want him to find out before I hunt him down and kill him -- told me Les Bleus were a sure thing. I am steadfastly ignoring the fact that Wesley told me England would win it all, and they still haven't lost. Of course, the game was a very exciting 1 to 1 tie, as they so often have in this sport. Almost as good as the zero to zero ties.
Give me a good demon-gladiator fight to bet on, any day.
But this rant isn't just about how much I hate the nation of France. It's about how much I hate the sport of soccer, not just because it's about as interesting as watching grass grow, but because every four years, Americans can expect to be lectured about how we don't have a proper appreciation for the poetry of the game -- which I suppose applies if "poetry" is what you call the slogans that English skinheads recite while they are beating the crap out of anybody who happens to be in their way. Now, admittedly, soccer is the only sport I know to have started a war, and for that alone, my former employers liked to pump as much money as possible into the Fédération Internationale de Football Association (and seriously, WTF is with that acronym? Something else to blame the French for). But keep your moralizing and your kickball to yourself, thanks.
Did I mention that I had George Mason in the Final Four? Hell, I got George Mason into the Final Four. There may have been ritual sacrifice involved. I'm still dining out on my bracket money. Now basketball, that's a sport.
Mavs in six.
Also, David Beckham is a pussy.