http://laviedekt.blogspot.com/

i feel nauseous.  the only thing I feel is guilt from this fucking muffin.  Guilt. Anger. I dont know what I am going to do tomorrow morning.  This is going to mess up two days for me. aksd;ajksdf

I am so ANGRY.  Angry at my best friend first of all- so heres the scoop.  we went away together and I was so optimistic the whole time.  but she was always so moody.  Then she didnt really call me when we came back ( i figured she needed some space, w/e)... then she went someplace WE were supposed to go to with someone else.. and showed up at my ( Read more... )

my blog:

http://laviedekt.blogspot.com/

i was really hungry when I woke up this morning.  I got stuck walking home from work last night and by the time I got back I was exhausted ( Read more... )

 its amazing how one can have an entirely different (more optimistic) mindset when she allows herself to eat until satisfied.  amazing.

This needs to stop.  This obsession, this lack of social life, this all consuming power.  It is really amazing how the human mind works.  I have a daily struggle with myself from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed.. sometimes in my dreams.  It is almost like I am never resting.  So I ask myself now, where to begin?  I have seen ( Read more... )

for me i am bored with food.  it almost seems easier to just not eat although I need to eat.  How do I get over this boredom, break my routine.  adfkla;jsa i just want to scream out I am so bored!  I am bored with my obsession and bored wtih never being satisfied. 

Did you ever wonder what it's like to live with an alcoholic?  Well, it's disgusting.  nothing is ever clean.  He sleeps all day long and is up drinking all night long.  He can't sit without having a drink near by or in his hands.  He can't remember what he last said and can't carry conversations.  This used to be someone I looked up to, someone ( Read more... )

Im having anxiety. 
I had a nonfat yogurt for my post dinner snack which was good and healthy.  But i'm used to either obessing about what I am going to eat (a lot of fruit and being hungry or a lot of carbs and fats and being overfull) and I am not used to actually being satisfied.  Also I am upset because I know i didnt eat enough today and want ( Read more... )