But what good is the heart when it shudders to speak?

[freeverse26]

I hate not being able to voice out how I really feel but I have to. :(

I smile even if I don't have the heart to actually do so. I laugh but I can't feel the real genuine laugh I used to have. I'm still noisy, but I'm actually getting a headache. Actually, this "pagkikimkim" is taking its toll on me. I'm actually not feeling well. Its always like

Comments

Yeah totally

[deathsweetrc]

I feel the same thing when I have something I want to say but I don't have the nerve to speak up. Lagi ko nalang kinikimkim sa sarili ko. It's really hard holding it in and sometimes explosion is the only way to release it (sasabog na ata ulo at dibdib ko). You are right in fighting it because this kind of anxiety can lead to suicide (which is a really bad thing ;|).

Re: Yeah totally

[freeverse26]

I think what makes me keep things to myself is the thought that if I don't, things may not be the same anymore. I'm just used to how things are right now. Well, that's a bad thing though. But there's just some things that has to be taken one step at a time. I'll get this out eventually. I'm pretty sure of that.

Don't worry, I'm still sane. Suicide is not a thought nor an option. :)