[Fic] The Years After
title : The Years After
pairing : Yunho/Jaejoong
genre: angst
length: oneshot
rating: pg-13
summary: years after disbandment, old flames from an old love burns once more despite the coldest kind of circumstance.
-
“It’s getting colder, Yun, let’s go home?”
Jaejoong is tightening his sweater on his thin body. The weather in the end of September always rather colder than the previous months. It will be winter soon.
Another winter that I’m going to spend in waiting. Perhaps it’s gonna be another wasted season, but I won’t give up. I’m staying by your side, Yunho-yah…
Yunho doesn’t give him any reaction. Not a single gesture, or even the slightest glance. As if Jaejoong isn’t there with in the first place.
Jaejoong look at Yunho in worry. Yunho sits really quietly on a bench in the park. He looks forward, but he isn’t really seeing particular things. His eyes are empty as always and he had been doing that since two hours ago. It’s quite long to stay around in the middle of cold and strong winds of autumn. Yunho only wears a long sleeve t-shirt and a soft yellow scarf around his neck. If they aren’t leaving soon, he probably will catch a cold.
“Yun…” Jaejoong is trying again.
Look at me, please-please-please….
Yet his plea meets another futile attempts.
It’s become harder in every days that passed to see the once his proud-gentle-care-loving band leader, now stuck in the lowest point in his life. If only Jaejoong knew their end would be this damned kind of end, he would stayed in Yunho’s side. No matter how hard it was for him.
Yunho was his brother. Yunho was his solace. Yunho was his light. Yunho was his everything, from the smallest to the biggest, Jung Yunho was all for Kim Jaejoong.
Jaejoong sighed heavily. He is taking off his sweater and wearing it to Yunho, letting it be another source of warm for the man. Yunho look at him questioningly. But Jaejoong is saying no words, he just sitting himself right beside Yunho.
Slowly, Jaejoong reaches for Yunho’s hand and hold it tight. He smiles to Yunho warmly. “It’s okay if you want to stay here a little longer. Next time, just let me know if you want to go to the park. I will bring extra sweater for you.”
Or you can just let me to hug you…
Yunho breaths harshly, set his hand free from Jaejoong’s hold immediately. He stands up and giving back the sweater to Jaejoong, before he takes fast steps to leaving.
“Wait! Yunho, wait! Where are you going?”
Yunho doesn’t answering.
“Are we going home?”
The moment Yunho gives him small nod, Jaejoong smiles in victory.
“Why?” Jaejoong asks in teasing tone. “Because I gave you my sweater so you afraid if I’m the one whose gonna catch a cold?”
Yunho still doesn’t say anything, but Jaejoong knows the answer better.
I know you still care for me, Yunho-yah. Still is, forever will and forever more.
+
“Yah! Jung Yunho, say something to me. It’s getting boring, you know?”
Yunho snorted loudly at Yoochun. He is giving the man a side sharp glance before looking back to television in silence.
“I thought you would be able entertainment me so I was agreed right away when Jaejoong asked me to accompany you.”
Yunho sends Yoochun another sharp glances. Then he take out a small notes and a pen that he always brings inside his pocket.
Get the fuck off from here then. He writes and shows it to Yoochun.
“Ck, unfortunately, that won’t do. Jaejoong’s going to kill me if he is here and couldn’t find my ass.”
Yunho is looking for blank space in the notes and write another sentences. You talks a lot today and you sounds like Changmin. Much.
“Na-ah. I’m nicer than Changmin. And talking about Changmin, what did he do actually, travelling around the world and didn’t come back for months?”
I don’t know. Shut up. I’m watching TV here.
But Yoochun isn’t paying attention much to what Yunho writes. He comes with another random question to annoy Yunho. “Hey, Yun… what day that you love the most?”
Yunho looks at Yoochun lazily, but answer it nonetheless.
Wednesday.
He looks at what he just writes in deep thought, then write once more.
Friday, too. And… Saturday.
“I said ‘day’, Yunho. That’s mean one day only.”
I don’t care. I like those days.
“Why?”
Yunho doesn’t write anything, but Yoochun knows the answer better.
It’s because in those days Jaejoong was used to accompany you longer than in the other days, right, Yun?
+
“Yunho-yah! Wake up, Yunho-yah!”
Yunho is now opening his eyes slowly by hearing Jaejoong’s loud and cheerful voice. The man greets him with a wide smile in his face.
Yunho groans.
“Well, good morning to you too, lazy old man. You will be fourty in few days. Stop acts like a teenager. Get your ass to the kitchen, I felt like to cooking today, so come with me. Maybe I’ll make you be a good helper.”
Yunho groans once more, louder.
“Anyway, is there anything you want to eat?” Jaejoong grabs Yunho’s notes and pen from the nightstand. “Here. Write all food you want. I’ll cook them for you.”
But Yunho stays in silence still. A pout soon forming in Jaejoong’s lips.
“I’ve seen your notes this morning, you wrote so much things to Yoochun yesterday. Why did you never write any single thing to me?”
Write me everything you want, Yunho-yah. I’ll give them all for you. Even if you say you want my soul, I’ll give it right away.
“Okay, if you still don’t want to answer me. I’ll just cook ddeobokki, you like ddeobokki, don’t you?”
I said once that you are like ddeobokki, didn’t I, Yunho-yah? I want ddeobokki.
I want you…
+
“Woah… I’m so proud of Junsu. He’s really a successful businessman now. He’s going to open another hotel branch next month.”
Jaejoong comes to the kitchen with today’s newspaper in his hand. Yunho sat in a chair, eats his cereals quietly.
“Can you see his smile, Yunho-yah? It’s so bright, just like his smile when he was singing in the stage for the first time as Dong Bang Shin Ki. I couldn’t never forget his smile that day.”
Meets the silence. The only sounds can be heard is the spoon that bumping against Yunho’s plate.
“I always miss that day.” Jaejoong sighs. “I miss our glorious days. I miss our brothers.”
And I miss you too, Yunho-yah… The old and lively you…
+
“Hyung… Yunho hyung…”
The man in front of him kept sleeping. Changmin just want to let the man to sleep a little longer, but he notice that Yunho is sweating so bad. His breath is harsh and he is frowning in his sleep. He looks like in deep pain, looking so vulnerable even in his unconscious state. The man must be having a bad dream.
“Yunho. Damn it, wake up!”
Few minutes later, the man finally opened up his eyes after Changmin having a great deal to shake his body. The younger man give him a glass of water.
“Are you okay?” Changmin asks hesitately. He reaches for Yunho’s small notes and pen and give them to the man.
I’m okay.
Yunho looks at Changmin, forcing himself to smile a little.
When did you come back?
“Last night.”
Why so sudden? I heard from Yoochun, you were still in Germany two days ago.
Changmin look at Yunho with deep frown in his face. He isn’t sure about what he should say but he settles with, “Nothing. It’s just about the time for me to comeback.”
Yunho makes a small hm sounds, and doesn’t push Changmin any further.
Where is Jaejoongie? I… had a weird dream about him just now.
Changmin sighs. He doesn’t say anything, but he glances at some pieces of certain newspaper articles were sticking in the wall.
Yunho was the one who did it. He said it would kept him being reminded everytime memories pulled him into another world of delusions.Yunho is following Changmin eyes direction timidly. It’s not hard to find what’s the younger had been looking at. There is anything in the bedroom wall, aside from newspaper pieces.
TVXQ former leader, Jung Yunho, collapsed in his military camp.
Yes, Yunho remembers that day…
One year after TVXQ contract was ended, Yunho and Changmin joined military service. In the middle of his duties, Yunho was collaps and wake up days after, to found himself losing his voice. A virus infected his voice cord, destructed it permanently. That was all could be said.
Yunho was broke. He was destroyed. Shattered into tiny pieces like a broken glass. Once one fine man, now living like a creature without no soul.
JYJ terminated their contract with CJes entertertainment, Kim Jaejoong came out with the biggest scandalous confession.
Yunho remembers that day too. It’s still fresh in his mind, Jaejoong was telling the world that he was gay. Let the world knew that he would stay by Yunho’s side, the only love of his life. That he would fix every pieces that already broken in Yunho without any trace of doubt in his eyes. Even if it was beyond repair. No matter how many years it would takes. No matter how the whole world looked at him in disgust.
Kim Jaejoong died in terrible car accident.
No. Yunho doesn’t want to remember that day, but it keep flooding his mind nonetheless. It was his birthday. They supposed to celebrated it together. Jaejoong promised that he would make it, he would come to Yunho’s apartement before midnight no matter how busy he was.
He was speed up his car…
He would make it…
He should…
and… crash.
Yunho-yah…
+
Yunho is wondering. Which part he should cut for a faster way to meet his Jaejoong. He holds a knife shakingly.
You’d never write any single thing to me, Yunho-yah….
Jaejoongie …
I want you…
Jaejoongie…
I miss you, Yunho-yah…
Jaejoongie…
Yunho doesn’t care anymore. He shouldn’t care. Any part will do.
Write anything you want, Yunho-yah…
He writes it in red.
Jaejoongie…
+
“You came?” Jaejoong snorted. He pouts his lips cutely.
Hm.
“You dumbass, I’d never thought that you would have a gut to follow me. I’d never ask you to come, you know. I just want you to be happy, that’s everything I asked for.”
This is happiest of me, Jaejoongie… Anywhere would be fine, as long as there is you.
“I know, Yunho-yah. I know…” His pout disappeared. He takes Yunho’s hand in his. “Let’s go?”
Hm.
They walk hand in hand, taking slow steps to the direction that there’s anyone would know. Both of shadows faded into thin air. Their love burns in eternity.
-end-
a/n I read bunch of angst fics few days ago, and suddenly I was in the mood to ‘kill’ our YunJae. I should distance myself from any form of angst fic or I will end up doing this again in near time.
pairing : Yunho/Jaejoong
genre: angst
length: oneshot
rating: pg-13
summary: years after disbandment, old flames from an old love burns once more despite the coldest kind of circumstance.
-
“It’s getting colder, Yun, let’s go home?”
Jaejoong is tightening his sweater on his thin body. The weather in the end of September always rather colder than the previous months. It will be winter soon.
Another winter that I’m going to spend in waiting. Perhaps it’s gonna be another wasted season, but I won’t give up. I’m staying by your side, Yunho-yah…
Yunho doesn’t give him any reaction. Not a single gesture, or even the slightest glance. As if Jaejoong isn’t there with in the first place.
Jaejoong look at Yunho in worry. Yunho sits really quietly on a bench in the park. He looks forward, but he isn’t really seeing particular things. His eyes are empty as always and he had been doing that since two hours ago. It’s quite long to stay around in the middle of cold and strong winds of autumn. Yunho only wears a long sleeve t-shirt and a soft yellow scarf around his neck. If they aren’t leaving soon, he probably will catch a cold.
“Yun…” Jaejoong is trying again.
Look at me, please-please-please….
Yet his plea meets another futile attempts.
It’s become harder in every days that passed to see the once his proud-gentle-care-loving band leader, now stuck in the lowest point in his life. If only Jaejoong knew their end would be this damned kind of end, he would stayed in Yunho’s side. No matter how hard it was for him.
Yunho was his brother. Yunho was his solace. Yunho was his light. Yunho was his everything, from the smallest to the biggest, Jung Yunho was all for Kim Jaejoong.
Jaejoong sighed heavily. He is taking off his sweater and wearing it to Yunho, letting it be another source of warm for the man. Yunho look at him questioningly. But Jaejoong is saying no words, he just sitting himself right beside Yunho.
Slowly, Jaejoong reaches for Yunho’s hand and hold it tight. He smiles to Yunho warmly. “It’s okay if you want to stay here a little longer. Next time, just let me know if you want to go to the park. I will bring extra sweater for you.”
Or you can just let me to hug you…
Yunho breaths harshly, set his hand free from Jaejoong’s hold immediately. He stands up and giving back the sweater to Jaejoong, before he takes fast steps to leaving.
“Wait! Yunho, wait! Where are you going?”
Yunho doesn’t answering.
“Are we going home?”
The moment Yunho gives him small nod, Jaejoong smiles in victory.
“Why?” Jaejoong asks in teasing tone. “Because I gave you my sweater so you afraid if I’m the one whose gonna catch a cold?”
Yunho still doesn’t say anything, but Jaejoong knows the answer better.
I know you still care for me, Yunho-yah. Still is, forever will and forever more.
+
“Yah! Jung Yunho, say something to me. It’s getting boring, you know?”
Yunho snorted loudly at Yoochun. He is giving the man a side sharp glance before looking back to television in silence.
“I thought you would be able entertainment me so I was agreed right away when Jaejoong asked me to accompany you.”
Yunho sends Yoochun another sharp glances. Then he take out a small notes and a pen that he always brings inside his pocket.
Get the fuck off from here then. He writes and shows it to Yoochun.
“Ck, unfortunately, that won’t do. Jaejoong’s going to kill me if he is here and couldn’t find my ass.”
Yunho is looking for blank space in the notes and write another sentences. You talks a lot today and you sounds like Changmin. Much.
“Na-ah. I’m nicer than Changmin. And talking about Changmin, what did he do actually, travelling around the world and didn’t come back for months?”
I don’t know. Shut up. I’m watching TV here.
But Yoochun isn’t paying attention much to what Yunho writes. He comes with another random question to annoy Yunho. “Hey, Yun… what day that you love the most?”
Yunho looks at Yoochun lazily, but answer it nonetheless.
Wednesday.
He looks at what he just writes in deep thought, then write once more.
Friday, too. And… Saturday.
“I said ‘day’, Yunho. That’s mean one day only.”
I don’t care. I like those days.
“Why?”
Yunho doesn’t write anything, but Yoochun knows the answer better.
It’s because in those days Jaejoong was used to accompany you longer than in the other days, right, Yun?
+
“Yunho-yah! Wake up, Yunho-yah!”
Yunho is now opening his eyes slowly by hearing Jaejoong’s loud and cheerful voice. The man greets him with a wide smile in his face.
Yunho groans.
“Well, good morning to you too, lazy old man. You will be fourty in few days. Stop acts like a teenager. Get your ass to the kitchen, I felt like to cooking today, so come with me. Maybe I’ll make you be a good helper.”
Yunho groans once more, louder.
“Anyway, is there anything you want to eat?” Jaejoong grabs Yunho’s notes and pen from the nightstand. “Here. Write all food you want. I’ll cook them for you.”
But Yunho stays in silence still. A pout soon forming in Jaejoong’s lips.
“I’ve seen your notes this morning, you wrote so much things to Yoochun yesterday. Why did you never write any single thing to me?”
Write me everything you want, Yunho-yah. I’ll give them all for you. Even if you say you want my soul, I’ll give it right away.
“Okay, if you still don’t want to answer me. I’ll just cook ddeobokki, you like ddeobokki, don’t you?”
I said once that you are like ddeobokki, didn’t I, Yunho-yah? I want ddeobokki.
I want you…
+
“Woah… I’m so proud of Junsu. He’s really a successful businessman now. He’s going to open another hotel branch next month.”
Jaejoong comes to the kitchen with today’s newspaper in his hand. Yunho sat in a chair, eats his cereals quietly.
“Can you see his smile, Yunho-yah? It’s so bright, just like his smile when he was singing in the stage for the first time as Dong Bang Shin Ki. I couldn’t never forget his smile that day.”
Meets the silence. The only sounds can be heard is the spoon that bumping against Yunho’s plate.
“I always miss that day.” Jaejoong sighs. “I miss our glorious days. I miss our brothers.”
And I miss you too, Yunho-yah… The old and lively you…
+
“Hyung… Yunho hyung…”
The man in front of him kept sleeping. Changmin just want to let the man to sleep a little longer, but he notice that Yunho is sweating so bad. His breath is harsh and he is frowning in his sleep. He looks like in deep pain, looking so vulnerable even in his unconscious state. The man must be having a bad dream.
“Yunho. Damn it, wake up!”
Few minutes later, the man finally opened up his eyes after Changmin having a great deal to shake his body. The younger man give him a glass of water.
“Are you okay?” Changmin asks hesitately. He reaches for Yunho’s small notes and pen and give them to the man.
I’m okay.
Yunho looks at Changmin, forcing himself to smile a little.
When did you come back?
“Last night.”
Why so sudden? I heard from Yoochun, you were still in Germany two days ago.
Changmin look at Yunho with deep frown in his face. He isn’t sure about what he should say but he settles with, “Nothing. It’s just about the time for me to comeback.”
Yunho makes a small hm sounds, and doesn’t push Changmin any further.
Where is Jaejoongie? I… had a weird dream about him just now.
Changmin sighs. He doesn’t say anything, but he glances at some pieces of certain newspaper articles were sticking in the wall.
Yunho was the one who did it. He said it would kept him being reminded everytime memories pulled him into another world of delusions.Yunho is following Changmin eyes direction timidly. It’s not hard to find what’s the younger had been looking at. There is anything in the bedroom wall, aside from newspaper pieces.
TVXQ former leader, Jung Yunho, collapsed in his military camp.
Yes, Yunho remembers that day…
One year after TVXQ contract was ended, Yunho and Changmin joined military service. In the middle of his duties, Yunho was collaps and wake up days after, to found himself losing his voice. A virus infected his voice cord, destructed it permanently. That was all could be said.
Yunho was broke. He was destroyed. Shattered into tiny pieces like a broken glass. Once one fine man, now living like a creature without no soul.
JYJ terminated their contract with CJes entertertainment, Kim Jaejoong came out with the biggest scandalous confession.
Yunho remembers that day too. It’s still fresh in his mind, Jaejoong was telling the world that he was gay. Let the world knew that he would stay by Yunho’s side, the only love of his life. That he would fix every pieces that already broken in Yunho without any trace of doubt in his eyes. Even if it was beyond repair. No matter how many years it would takes. No matter how the whole world looked at him in disgust.
Kim Jaejoong died in terrible car accident.
No. Yunho doesn’t want to remember that day, but it keep flooding his mind nonetheless. It was his birthday. They supposed to celebrated it together. Jaejoong promised that he would make it, he would come to Yunho’s apartement before midnight no matter how busy he was.
He was speed up his car…
He would make it…
He should…
and… crash.
Yunho-yah…
+
Yunho is wondering. Which part he should cut for a faster way to meet his Jaejoong. He holds a knife shakingly.
You’d never write any single thing to me, Yunho-yah….
Jaejoongie …
I want you…
Jaejoongie…
I miss you, Yunho-yah…
Jaejoongie…
Yunho doesn’t care anymore. He shouldn’t care. Any part will do.
Write anything you want, Yunho-yah…
He writes it in red.
Jaejoongie…
+
“You came?” Jaejoong snorted. He pouts his lips cutely.
Hm.
“You dumbass, I’d never thought that you would have a gut to follow me. I’d never ask you to come, you know. I just want you to be happy, that’s everything I asked for.”
This is happiest of me, Jaejoongie… Anywhere would be fine, as long as there is you.
“I know, Yunho-yah. I know…” His pout disappeared. He takes Yunho’s hand in his. “Let’s go?”
Hm.
They walk hand in hand, taking slow steps to the direction that there’s anyone would know. Both of shadows faded into thin air. Their love burns in eternity.
-end-
a/n I read bunch of angst fics few days ago, and suddenly I was in the mood to ‘kill’ our YunJae. I should distance myself from any form of angst fic or I will end up doing this again in near time.