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releasing the clamp on my brain
what a beautiful mistake this life can be. i'm not too sure it means anything at all. today was my day off. i spent it in my lover, karl's bed. most of the day i slept. i'd wake up every now and then craving shit i shouldn't be craving. i'd call my sponsor, but he recommends that i check myself into rehab, or a psyche ward. i've been having such ( Read more... ) -
i'm straight edge!
my therapist said it best when he told me that it's okay for people not to like me. it wasn't until i got off the alcohol and drugs(94 days clean and sober!) i finally comprehend what he's been trying to tell me. you see, my paranoia is still around, but it's much less intense. do i still want to commit suicide/homicide? YES! -but who doesn't from ( Read more... ) -
halfway to thirty days clean and sober
i wasn't going to post this until i had a month clean and sober. the DT's(delirium tremors-alcohol with drawl) didn't last long enough for me to be hospitalized (thank god). i'm currently working on my first and second step with my sponser. it's getting easier(considering how long i've been fucking my life up). i still have a loving mate (kelfstein ( Read more... ) -
holy fucking shit
DisorderYour ScoreMajor Depression:Very HighDysthymia:Slight-ModerateBipolar Disorder:HighCyclothymia:Slight-ModerateSeasonal Affective Disorder:HighPostpartum Depression:N/ATake the Depression Test -
free love on the street. in the alley it ain't that cheap.
forgive me first of all for quoting "fall out boy" for the journal title(i couldn't have written a more clever lyric if i tried). i've lost my fucking mind. officially. i did something tonight that i'm not too proud of. i need to grow the fuck up. for fuck sake, i'm not the person i was supposed to be(whoever that is. or was ( Read more... ) -
a day in the life of a rat
woke up today nuzzlin my mate, karl. he woke up and kind of got upset because he was supposed to start dinner in the crock pot and had no time(didn't even have time to shower-although i hardly mind that. rawr!) anyway, i volunteered to start dinner. i threw on a dj mix from "the doc" and got to cookin. i chopped carrots, onions(OMG, MAH EYES!), ( Read more... )
