fic: jump in (3/?)
jump in. part three.
lily brings her hand to her lap where her other one covers it and maybe, briefly, her thumb traces skin, the memory there. lily loveless/kathryn prescott. 3615 words. (NC-17)
disclaimer: This story is lies, lies, lies. Complete fiction.
(credit)
take it as it comes and take me as I am.
I never was a good imposter,
but I know how to dream
(everytime it rains, charlotte martin)
"Why do you always have to worry?"
"Because you don't," Lily shoots back. It's true, and this is probably all it is, but when she says it, her fingers fidget and maybe she looks away, just for a second, but a second is long enough. She continues, softer: "So you don't. I guess. I don't know."
Lily takes to biting her nails, and it's a nervous habit not befitting her, really. Eventually, Kat finds that she only does it when people start asking questions. Lily notices her staring before she even realizes it herself, rolling her eyes. "Shut up, stop looking at me like that."
Kat shakes her head, stops looking at her at all. "You're impossible."
Naomi's episode and they start in on rehearsals the day they get the scripts in. It doesn't take long to realize why they want to practice it.
"Wow, we're actually..." Kat looks up from the script to see Lily flipping the page of hers while downing the last of her water. "It's a proper love story, isn't it?"
"You hadn't already guessed?"
"Hadn't really thought about it."
Lily rolls her eyes. "I fucking had."
She says it with an air of nonchalance that leaves Kat with envy and curiosity. "Really?"
"Believe it or not, but I'm rather invested in this character of mine."
"Right, me too. I mean, invested in Emily, that is."
Lily looks like she knows better. "Right."
"I'm starting to realize why I was single for so long."
They're at the curb outside of a club, waiting for a taxi. Kaya and Jack are groping each other against the far wall, while Lily shuffles her feet and shares a fag with Kat. She hadn't spoken since they left the club, so Kat's understandably surprised by the sudden conversation.
"What're you getting on about?"
Lily shrugs, inhales sharply, then holds out the cigarette. "Never mind."
Later, back at the hotel, they smoke a bowl. Kat holds a lighter up and green turns to red and her eyes flutter closed for a moment, inhaling slow and long. She breathes out, smiling lazily.
She holds the pipe out to Lily, her eyes eventually following the movement to look at her, heavy-lidded and unfocused. On Lily's hesitation, she laughs a raspy little laugh. "It's fucking Friday. Gonna sleep in past noon."
Lily smiles, nods, takes the piece and the lighter from Kat and lighting up. On slow exhale, her eyes find Kat's through the smoke. "You're always talking me into things."
"Shut up, you know you love it," Kat shoots back.
Lily keeps smiling.
One night, Jack mistakes Lily's bed for the loo and, well.
"At least I wasn't in it," Lily sighs, walks into Kat's room in her sweats, pulling her hair up. It's pouring outside, and the TV volume is a low hum compared to the rain pounding on the roof.
"Yeah, I'd make you shower a few times before letting you in."
"Good to know I have your support," Lily shoots back, grins tiredly. She walks over to the empty side of the bed and pulls back the comforter, slides under it and stretches, and the look of contentment on her face doesn't do much to put Kat at ease. It's Lily, in her bed, looking like that and... "Thank you, though. Didn't much feel like sleeping on the couch."
"I've done it before, and the kink you get in your neck isn't worth it, so yeah."
Lily's eyes are already closed and she hums in agreement. Sleep finds her fast.
Kathryn sits up straight, woken from her sleep. The clock reads 3 A.M. and Lily's sitting up as well, looking scared out of her mind. "What - what? What's wrong?"
Thunder rolls in and the walls nearly shake from it. She turns to Lily, understands. "Thunder. It's okay."
She shakes her head, looks more frustrated than scared now. "I hate thunder."
Kat leans over to turn the light on. "It's okay, Lils, we'll just - "
"Woke me up, can't go back to sleep," Lily practically growls.
"Well, the solution to that is to just not try and sleep, okay?" Kat turns on the TV, ups the volume enough to drown out the hard pounding of rain on the window. Her hand drops to Lily's knee, squeezing comfortingly. "Okay?"
Lily softens. "Okay."
Kathryn rolls off the bed, "I'll make some tea, maybe that'll help keep us awake."
After just a bit of fussing in the kitchen, their tea ready after a few minutes, Kat goes back into the room, and just as her knees touch the foot of the bed, the power shuts off. "Well. At least our tea is ready."
Lily laughs a little, catching in her throat as she fumbles for her mobile to illuminate the room. Kat carefully gets on the bed, handing her a cup while wrapping her hand fully around the other, for warmth.
"Power outages are fun. We don't need TV anyways. Drink your tea." Kathryn sips her own, tries not to stare too hard at how Lily's hands are shaking. After a minute: "Twenty questions?"
"I'm way too horrible and you're way too good."
"Why do you think I wanna play it?"
Lily snorts, shivers. "Fuck off."
Kat moves enough so that the comforters are free, and she adjusts it over both of them. "Alright, let's just...we're in bloody Bristol, far away from home, no parents around, up in the middle of the night with no power drinking weirdly labeled tea. We're obviously going hog wild tonight."
"I have no idea what you're even talking about."
"Let's talk about stuff we wouldn't normally talk about. Or we haven't talked about yet, or haven't talked about in a while." Even before her eyes begin to adjust to the darkness, she can see the soft smile on Lily's lips. "Tell me your first memory."
"My first memory? Like, ever?"
"Well - " Kat tilts her head as she thinks about it. "How 'bout, like, a recent one. A recent happy memory."
Lily doesn't hesitate. "The call I got where they told me I had the part."
"Yeah?" Kat smiles at her.
"Yeah. Can't really beat that." Lily takes a gulp of her tea, and looks properly relaxed compared to a few minutes ago. Mission accomplished. "You?"
Kat looks down, tracing the rim of her mug. "This."
"Your tea? You really need to get out more, you know."
Kat can't bring herself to smile. She sighs into it, "You know what I mean, Lily."
The nod is barely there, but she can see it. She can see Lily swallow without drinking anything, she can see the way her eyes start to glisten differently, blue and transparent. It leaves Kat feeling like she's held upside down, blood rushing to places it's never been and heart beating painfully fast.
"Yeah, I suppose I do."
She wakes up to find Lily's head resting in her lap, fingers curled around her arm and her eyes just openening. Kat doesn't even bother to stifle a yawn. "Hey."
"Hey."
"You just woke up, right?" Lily nods. "Okay, good, I was afraid...you fell asleep and I stayed up a bit longer. Didn't want you to wake up alone again."
"You stayed like this, all night?"
"You looked set, didn't wanna disturb. 'sides, like I said, waited until I knew you were asleep, then zonked out myself."
Lily sits up, legs stretching against the cool, untouched sheets at the foot of the bed, eyes never leaving Kat's. "Thanks."
Kat straightens (squirms), and there's a pop from her back that elicits no more than a brief grimace through another yawn. "For what?"
"Last night," Lily explains.
Kathryn shrugs. "It wasn't a big deal. Are you feeling better?"
Lily takes her time getting a nod out before looking down and away. "Yeah."
There's a fag only half burnt hanging between her lips while she fumbles with another. When she seems to finally realize she has the one still lit, she sits a little straight, inhales and pulls it away. Exhaling, she looks over to Kat, eyes barely open. "Smoke?"
Kat looks down to see her holding it out for her, had probably been holding it out for a long while before she finally said something. Averting her eyes, she nods and takes it. Lily has her lighter lit before she even touches her lips to it. Her hands are shaking in the cold, so Kathryn leans in to the light and cups her hands over Lily's. Their eyes meet just a moment before she pulls away, puff of smoke between them.
Lily brings her hand to her lap where her other one covers it and maybe, briefly, her thumb traces skin, the memory there.
In an alternate universe, where stupid things like feelings and bloody chemistry have no part, it's certain in Kathryn's mind that Lily would make an excellent best friend. She's prone to her own set of eccentricities, her moody days, of course, but it's the things she does with such ease that stand out in Kat's mind.
This is no alternate universe, though. She can't just hug her like a friend does, she can't ignore the way she instantly warms up when Lily hugs her, protects her from the cold. She can't ignore the heartbeat against her own and the way, sometimes, Lily's lips graze the curve of her neck, painfully brief.
She simply can't be friends with this girl.
"Do you ever wonder," she starts, stops for a minute. The air's heavy, a lack of breeze, and it leaves her mouth a little dry. "What if everything was different?"
Lily sits up in her chair, legs outstretched pulling in slowly, her hand falling across the space between them until her fingers rest in Kat's palm. They trace the heart line there.
She never actually answers the question.
Lily and her boyfriend get in a spat in the club. Kathryn's too far and the music is too loud for her to know what they're on about, but she can see Lily fighting hard against exaggerated motions, against yelling, looking very tired, no energy to handle this at all. She can see him, quite distinctly, mouth the words "Fuck you" and Kathryn can't stand it, pushing through the crowd.
Lily turns and walks away from him before she gets there. She looks infuriated and passes Kat, eyes matching for a moment, before she gently moves past her, walks up to the bar where Kaya is. The entire time, he's following her, looking stupidly angry. Kat's distracted from giving him a swift kick, seeing the determined way Lily pushes through everyone, a straight, uninterrupted line, and Kat starts to move to the bar as well, to be the steady hand after the inevitable shot (or five).
But she stops dead when she sees Lily walk up to the bar, spin Kaya around in her stool and kiss her. And she bloody kisses her, hands on either side of her face, bending Kaya backwards and -
What the fuck?
The kiss ends as swiftly as it began, and Lily doesn't even smile at Kaya, doesn't even look at her, turning immediately to the lad. She doesn't say anything to him either, and he simply stomps off.
The only reaction Kaya manages is a lift of the eyebrows, eyelids heavy and gaze foggy at best. She smiles lazily. "Need a drink?"
"Fucking several," Lily practically growls, Kat walking up to them now, finally pulling her jaw up from the floor.
They get back to the hotel and Kaya and Jack somehow end up going off in the direction of Lily's bedroom, while Kat shuts the door behind her and Lily herself is stumbling into the common area. She's at the point of giggling every few minutes for no reason and she starts in again as she kicks off her shoes. "Guess I'm bunking with you, Kitty Kat."
"Guess so." Kat doesn't look at her, heads on straight to her room where she only bothers to take her pants off before crawling under the sheets. It's all she can do to not replay earlier, bit by bit. The way Lily held Kaya, bent her backwards, fucking...
Lily stumbles loudly into the room, nearly falling face first over Kat's discarded jeans.
"So what was that all about?" Kat asks before she can help herself.
"Hmm?"
"You kissed Kaya." She doesn't mean for it to, but fuck, she sounds so incredibly jealous.
Lily sighs, smiles rather stupidly. "I'll hate myself when I'm sober but...good way to end that, right?"
Kat bites down on her lip. She isn't here to judge, especially since she'd been two seconds from kneeing him in the crotch and hadn't a clue of what they were fighting about. "You lot are over, then?"
"God, yes. He was going off, and... it was all ridiculous. It's been ridiculous for a while."
"Has he been that bad?"
"It's not him, not all him. I mean, tonight it was, obviously. It was just the end of the straw...the line, I mean. We've been...not close for a while, and neither of us..." Lily sighs heavy, blowing the hair out of her face as she continues to struggle with her belt. "Fuck it!"
"Right," Kat nods, but feels an uncomfortable sort of energy bubbling up, fighting for release. She can't help it: "But why Kaya?"
"Going on and on about..." Lily walks until the bed stops her. She takes a long time before finishing. "Whatever, it was all I could think to shut him up."
"I guess..."
"You don't think I was being a prat about it, do you?" She asks, concern dawning over her momentarily because she snorts, again. "Fuck it, I can be a prat on occasion."
"I guess I just... well."
"Well what?"
"Why Kaya specifically?" She asks, forces her voice to be as smooth and nonchalant as possible, not quite sure how far to push it. It doesn't help when Lily finally manages her belt, and kicks off her pants and Kat's eyes start to travel where they may. "Why not someone else?"
"There wasn't anyone else."
Kat tries to ignore how much it hurts to hear that, pushes forward. "There was...well, me."
Lily shrugs, nearly loses her balance in the process. "Kaya's got a good sense of humor about it. We're always fucking joking about how Effy should join in on a threesome. I guess I figured it'd go over easier. Didn't want to freak you out."
Kat has the sudden urge to fidget with the edge of the duvet, just as Lily lifts her top over her head, so that now she's in nothing but her underwear and bra. "Do you think I'm that neurotic?"
"Oh, definitely." She doesn't have to look up to know Lily's smiling, but does anyway. And when she does, Lily's face softens, and the blonde reaches out and tweaks Kat's nose playfully. "Definitely neurotic, you are."
"Piss off," Kat can hardly manage a strong enough voice, halfheartedly pushing Lily's hand away.
"Were you jealous or something?" Lily steps closer, pokes her in the shoulder, taking great delight in the entire thing. "Just pissed that you didn't get lucky or what?"
Kat rolls her eyes, and must do so convincingly, because Lily shrugs the entire thing off, no answer given. She stumbles onto the bed, climbing over Kathryn to get to her side of the bed.
But then, then Kat does something impulsive. Just as Lily takes her (sweet, sweet) time climbing over her, her hands shoot out to grab ahold of her waist, keeping her in place.
"Wha - ?" Lily looks confused only momentarily, before slapping at Kat's hands to no avail. "You bloody perv!"
There's no strength to Lily's efforts, so Kat takes this as motivation, hands holding onto Lily firmer, skin against skin and trying to not drown in how intoxicating it feels to have Lily on top of her like this.
Everything stops for a moment, Lily obviously realizing Kat isn't quite kidding around, stilling over her.
"We're both pissed right now," she says, gently, like it's just hit her.
"Quite rightly, I might add," Kathryn croaks out.
"Hmm," Lily hums, and it seems to reverberate through her body, Kathryn feeling a vibration against her stomach and it leaving her a puddle underneath the blonde. Lily reacts to whatever Kathryn's expression looks like, then, by scooping forward and pressing her lips to the hollow of her throat, tongue darting out into the dip there, eliciting a breathy moan.
This goes on for a few minutes, Lily's mouth devouring her neck and Kat barely keeping control over how her body is moving beneath her. Eventually, it's all she can do to not moan out: "God, I've been - been thinking about... about this."
Lily's movements slow, her breath coming out as a pant, "Yeah?"
There's the moistness of Lily's lips against her neck and Kat forgets for a long moment how to breathe. When she finally remembers, it's practically a moan.
This, this is what Lily stills at, lifts her head up just enough so that her nose brushes Kat's cheek and her hair tickles at her ears. She tilts her head a bit. "Like, all night?"
Kat does her best to catch her breath, to find some strength in her vioce. "For a... for a while."
It's dark, but the not-quite-a-smile on her lips is there. She looks like this when she has an idea, when she decides something. "For a while, eh?"
Kat can barely manage to nod her head when Lily shifts further down. Soon it's so that she's not simply kneeling over her, but straddling her, her hips fitting perfectly against Kat's and warmth overwhelms and Kat lifts her hips up into, against Lily's, and that's that for any coherent thinking.
Lily drops down to Kat's neck, tongue and teeth and lips against the rapid pulse she finds there. Her hands slide down Kat's side, bunch at the cloth of her tank and push up. By the time it's up to her chin, Lily's mouth has moved down a path to the dip between Kat's breasts.
Through all of this, she's arching her hips into Kat, teasingly slow and paced. Lily palms Kat's tits as she kisses a trail down her stomach, to the band of her polka dot knickers. She smiles against cotton at this discovery, and Kat's entire body hitches upward.
"Fuck, Lily, you're - !" There isn't a moment for her to catch her breath between her knickers being pulled off swiftly and the feel of Lily's tongue flat against her clit. One hand fists the sheets beside her while the other buries itself in Lily's hair. Nails bite into her scalp and in response, her tongue moves faster. There was nothing intelligible left for Kathryn to say, biting down on her bottom lip until she can taste blood.
Without pretense, Lily slips a finger inside of her, purposefully slow until she's fully inside her and everything freezes for just a moment. Kat has to convince herself that she knows how to breathe, and she does, it's nothing short of a guttural moan, and her entire body sinks into Lily.
It's when she can hear - feel - Lily moan against her that she knows she's done for.
Fuck, she thinks, can't say, can't hardly breathe. Fuck, fuck, each time with a rise of her hips against Lily's mouth, taking her finger - and the one that joins it - further inside her. Fuck. Fuck...
Lily's fingers curl inside her. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Her tongue moves faster against her clit. Fuck, fuck, fuck fuck fuckfuck.
The entire bottom half of her arches up off the bed, and Lily's there to hold her, no sympathy as her tongue continues to dance circles around her clit and her fingers move in and out and Kat looks down to see her looking back up, and this is when she comes, jerking against her mouth and knuckles and crying out.
A long time passes, it feels like, but then eventually everything starts to slow a bit, only the sound of her panting to occupy the room.
Lily's lips move against her again, this time more tender, like a kiss. She lowers Kat back down to the bed and pulls away, slowly, lips glistening. Her eyes flutter closed when she sticks both fingers in her mouth and reverently sucks them clean. Kat whimpers, doesn't care how pathetic the sound is and squirms against her. Lily drops her hand so that both are massaging the inside of Kat's thighs. Their eyes lock in a hazy gaze, and it's like this for the longest time.
Kat's hands travel down the quick rise and fall of her stomach as she attempts to catch her breath, fingers wrapping around the curve of Lily's hip, and this is when a peculiar look crosses Lily's face, the softness giving way to something else. "I think m'gonna...pass out...now."
She doesn't wait for Kat's reaction, rather matter-of-factly rolling onto her side of the bed, and facing away. Kat's left on her own, and when she sits up and looks over at her, sees her eyes are closed, quite legitimately passed out, she can't fight the sudden feeling of dread. She fights it off, blindly searching for her discarded knickers and then letting the alcohol hit her as well, knocking off into sleep.
TBC....
lily brings her hand to her lap where her other one covers it and maybe, briefly, her thumb traces skin, the memory there. lily loveless/kathryn prescott. 3615 words. (NC-17)
disclaimer: This story is lies, lies, lies. Complete fiction.
(credit)
take it as it comes and take me as I am.
I never was a good imposter,
but I know how to dream
(everytime it rains, charlotte martin)
"Why do you always have to worry?"
"Because you don't," Lily shoots back. It's true, and this is probably all it is, but when she says it, her fingers fidget and maybe she looks away, just for a second, but a second is long enough. She continues, softer: "So you don't. I guess. I don't know."
Lily takes to biting her nails, and it's a nervous habit not befitting her, really. Eventually, Kat finds that she only does it when people start asking questions. Lily notices her staring before she even realizes it herself, rolling her eyes. "Shut up, stop looking at me like that."
Kat shakes her head, stops looking at her at all. "You're impossible."
Naomi's episode and they start in on rehearsals the day they get the scripts in. It doesn't take long to realize why they want to practice it.
"Wow, we're actually..." Kat looks up from the script to see Lily flipping the page of hers while downing the last of her water. "It's a proper love story, isn't it?"
"You hadn't already guessed?"
"Hadn't really thought about it."
Lily rolls her eyes. "I fucking had."
She says it with an air of nonchalance that leaves Kat with envy and curiosity. "Really?"
"Believe it or not, but I'm rather invested in this character of mine."
"Right, me too. I mean, invested in Emily, that is."
Lily looks like she knows better. "Right."
"I'm starting to realize why I was single for so long."
They're at the curb outside of a club, waiting for a taxi. Kaya and Jack are groping each other against the far wall, while Lily shuffles her feet and shares a fag with Kat. She hadn't spoken since they left the club, so Kat's understandably surprised by the sudden conversation.
"What're you getting on about?"
Lily shrugs, inhales sharply, then holds out the cigarette. "Never mind."
Later, back at the hotel, they smoke a bowl. Kat holds a lighter up and green turns to red and her eyes flutter closed for a moment, inhaling slow and long. She breathes out, smiling lazily.
She holds the pipe out to Lily, her eyes eventually following the movement to look at her, heavy-lidded and unfocused. On Lily's hesitation, she laughs a raspy little laugh. "It's fucking Friday. Gonna sleep in past noon."
Lily smiles, nods, takes the piece and the lighter from Kat and lighting up. On slow exhale, her eyes find Kat's through the smoke. "You're always talking me into things."
"Shut up, you know you love it," Kat shoots back.
Lily keeps smiling.
One night, Jack mistakes Lily's bed for the loo and, well.
"At least I wasn't in it," Lily sighs, walks into Kat's room in her sweats, pulling her hair up. It's pouring outside, and the TV volume is a low hum compared to the rain pounding on the roof.
"Yeah, I'd make you shower a few times before letting you in."
"Good to know I have your support," Lily shoots back, grins tiredly. She walks over to the empty side of the bed and pulls back the comforter, slides under it and stretches, and the look of contentment on her face doesn't do much to put Kat at ease. It's Lily, in her bed, looking like that and... "Thank you, though. Didn't much feel like sleeping on the couch."
"I've done it before, and the kink you get in your neck isn't worth it, so yeah."
Lily's eyes are already closed and she hums in agreement. Sleep finds her fast.
Kathryn sits up straight, woken from her sleep. The clock reads 3 A.M. and Lily's sitting up as well, looking scared out of her mind. "What - what? What's wrong?"
Thunder rolls in and the walls nearly shake from it. She turns to Lily, understands. "Thunder. It's okay."
She shakes her head, looks more frustrated than scared now. "I hate thunder."
Kat leans over to turn the light on. "It's okay, Lils, we'll just - "
"Woke me up, can't go back to sleep," Lily practically growls.
"Well, the solution to that is to just not try and sleep, okay?" Kat turns on the TV, ups the volume enough to drown out the hard pounding of rain on the window. Her hand drops to Lily's knee, squeezing comfortingly. "Okay?"
Lily softens. "Okay."
Kathryn rolls off the bed, "I'll make some tea, maybe that'll help keep us awake."
After just a bit of fussing in the kitchen, their tea ready after a few minutes, Kat goes back into the room, and just as her knees touch the foot of the bed, the power shuts off. "Well. At least our tea is ready."
Lily laughs a little, catching in her throat as she fumbles for her mobile to illuminate the room. Kat carefully gets on the bed, handing her a cup while wrapping her hand fully around the other, for warmth.
"Power outages are fun. We don't need TV anyways. Drink your tea." Kathryn sips her own, tries not to stare too hard at how Lily's hands are shaking. After a minute: "Twenty questions?"
"I'm way too horrible and you're way too good."
"Why do you think I wanna play it?"
Lily snorts, shivers. "Fuck off."
Kat moves enough so that the comforters are free, and she adjusts it over both of them. "Alright, let's just...we're in bloody Bristol, far away from home, no parents around, up in the middle of the night with no power drinking weirdly labeled tea. We're obviously going hog wild tonight."
"I have no idea what you're even talking about."
"Let's talk about stuff we wouldn't normally talk about. Or we haven't talked about yet, or haven't talked about in a while." Even before her eyes begin to adjust to the darkness, she can see the soft smile on Lily's lips. "Tell me your first memory."
"My first memory? Like, ever?"
"Well - " Kat tilts her head as she thinks about it. "How 'bout, like, a recent one. A recent happy memory."
Lily doesn't hesitate. "The call I got where they told me I had the part."
"Yeah?" Kat smiles at her.
"Yeah. Can't really beat that." Lily takes a gulp of her tea, and looks properly relaxed compared to a few minutes ago. Mission accomplished. "You?"
Kat looks down, tracing the rim of her mug. "This."
"Your tea? You really need to get out more, you know."
Kat can't bring herself to smile. She sighs into it, "You know what I mean, Lily."
The nod is barely there, but she can see it. She can see Lily swallow without drinking anything, she can see the way her eyes start to glisten differently, blue and transparent. It leaves Kat feeling like she's held upside down, blood rushing to places it's never been and heart beating painfully fast.
"Yeah, I suppose I do."
She wakes up to find Lily's head resting in her lap, fingers curled around her arm and her eyes just openening. Kat doesn't even bother to stifle a yawn. "Hey."
"Hey."
"You just woke up, right?" Lily nods. "Okay, good, I was afraid...you fell asleep and I stayed up a bit longer. Didn't want you to wake up alone again."
"You stayed like this, all night?"
"You looked set, didn't wanna disturb. 'sides, like I said, waited until I knew you were asleep, then zonked out myself."
Lily sits up, legs stretching against the cool, untouched sheets at the foot of the bed, eyes never leaving Kat's. "Thanks."
Kat straightens (squirms), and there's a pop from her back that elicits no more than a brief grimace through another yawn. "For what?"
"Last night," Lily explains.
Kathryn shrugs. "It wasn't a big deal. Are you feeling better?"
Lily takes her time getting a nod out before looking down and away. "Yeah."
There's a fag only half burnt hanging between her lips while she fumbles with another. When she seems to finally realize she has the one still lit, she sits a little straight, inhales and pulls it away. Exhaling, she looks over to Kat, eyes barely open. "Smoke?"
Kat looks down to see her holding it out for her, had probably been holding it out for a long while before she finally said something. Averting her eyes, she nods and takes it. Lily has her lighter lit before she even touches her lips to it. Her hands are shaking in the cold, so Kathryn leans in to the light and cups her hands over Lily's. Their eyes meet just a moment before she pulls away, puff of smoke between them.
Lily brings her hand to her lap where her other one covers it and maybe, briefly, her thumb traces skin, the memory there.
In an alternate universe, where stupid things like feelings and bloody chemistry have no part, it's certain in Kathryn's mind that Lily would make an excellent best friend. She's prone to her own set of eccentricities, her moody days, of course, but it's the things she does with such ease that stand out in Kat's mind.
This is no alternate universe, though. She can't just hug her like a friend does, she can't ignore the way she instantly warms up when Lily hugs her, protects her from the cold. She can't ignore the heartbeat against her own and the way, sometimes, Lily's lips graze the curve of her neck, painfully brief.
She simply can't be friends with this girl.
"Do you ever wonder," she starts, stops for a minute. The air's heavy, a lack of breeze, and it leaves her mouth a little dry. "What if everything was different?"
Lily sits up in her chair, legs outstretched pulling in slowly, her hand falling across the space between them until her fingers rest in Kat's palm. They trace the heart line there.
She never actually answers the question.
Lily and her boyfriend get in a spat in the club. Kathryn's too far and the music is too loud for her to know what they're on about, but she can see Lily fighting hard against exaggerated motions, against yelling, looking very tired, no energy to handle this at all. She can see him, quite distinctly, mouth the words "Fuck you" and Kathryn can't stand it, pushing through the crowd.
Lily turns and walks away from him before she gets there. She looks infuriated and passes Kat, eyes matching for a moment, before she gently moves past her, walks up to the bar where Kaya is. The entire time, he's following her, looking stupidly angry. Kat's distracted from giving him a swift kick, seeing the determined way Lily pushes through everyone, a straight, uninterrupted line, and Kat starts to move to the bar as well, to be the steady hand after the inevitable shot (or five).
But she stops dead when she sees Lily walk up to the bar, spin Kaya around in her stool and kiss her. And she bloody kisses her, hands on either side of her face, bending Kaya backwards and -
What the fuck?
The kiss ends as swiftly as it began, and Lily doesn't even smile at Kaya, doesn't even look at her, turning immediately to the lad. She doesn't say anything to him either, and he simply stomps off.
The only reaction Kaya manages is a lift of the eyebrows, eyelids heavy and gaze foggy at best. She smiles lazily. "Need a drink?"
"Fucking several," Lily practically growls, Kat walking up to them now, finally pulling her jaw up from the floor.
They get back to the hotel and Kaya and Jack somehow end up going off in the direction of Lily's bedroom, while Kat shuts the door behind her and Lily herself is stumbling into the common area. She's at the point of giggling every few minutes for no reason and she starts in again as she kicks off her shoes. "Guess I'm bunking with you, Kitty Kat."
"Guess so." Kat doesn't look at her, heads on straight to her room where she only bothers to take her pants off before crawling under the sheets. It's all she can do to not replay earlier, bit by bit. The way Lily held Kaya, bent her backwards, fucking...
Lily stumbles loudly into the room, nearly falling face first over Kat's discarded jeans.
"So what was that all about?" Kat asks before she can help herself.
"Hmm?"
"You kissed Kaya." She doesn't mean for it to, but fuck, she sounds so incredibly jealous.
Lily sighs, smiles rather stupidly. "I'll hate myself when I'm sober but...good way to end that, right?"
Kat bites down on her lip. She isn't here to judge, especially since she'd been two seconds from kneeing him in the crotch and hadn't a clue of what they were fighting about. "You lot are over, then?"
"God, yes. He was going off, and... it was all ridiculous. It's been ridiculous for a while."
"Has he been that bad?"
"It's not him, not all him. I mean, tonight it was, obviously. It was just the end of the straw...the line, I mean. We've been...not close for a while, and neither of us..." Lily sighs heavy, blowing the hair out of her face as she continues to struggle with her belt. "Fuck it!"
"Right," Kat nods, but feels an uncomfortable sort of energy bubbling up, fighting for release. She can't help it: "But why Kaya?"
"Going on and on about..." Lily walks until the bed stops her. She takes a long time before finishing. "Whatever, it was all I could think to shut him up."
"I guess..."
"You don't think I was being a prat about it, do you?" She asks, concern dawning over her momentarily because she snorts, again. "Fuck it, I can be a prat on occasion."
"I guess I just... well."
"Well what?"
"Why Kaya specifically?" She asks, forces her voice to be as smooth and nonchalant as possible, not quite sure how far to push it. It doesn't help when Lily finally manages her belt, and kicks off her pants and Kat's eyes start to travel where they may. "Why not someone else?"
"There wasn't anyone else."
Kat tries to ignore how much it hurts to hear that, pushes forward. "There was...well, me."
Lily shrugs, nearly loses her balance in the process. "Kaya's got a good sense of humor about it. We're always fucking joking about how Effy should join in on a threesome. I guess I figured it'd go over easier. Didn't want to freak you out."
Kat has the sudden urge to fidget with the edge of the duvet, just as Lily lifts her top over her head, so that now she's in nothing but her underwear and bra. "Do you think I'm that neurotic?"
"Oh, definitely." She doesn't have to look up to know Lily's smiling, but does anyway. And when she does, Lily's face softens, and the blonde reaches out and tweaks Kat's nose playfully. "Definitely neurotic, you are."
"Piss off," Kat can hardly manage a strong enough voice, halfheartedly pushing Lily's hand away.
"Were you jealous or something?" Lily steps closer, pokes her in the shoulder, taking great delight in the entire thing. "Just pissed that you didn't get lucky or what?"
Kat rolls her eyes, and must do so convincingly, because Lily shrugs the entire thing off, no answer given. She stumbles onto the bed, climbing over Kathryn to get to her side of the bed.
But then, then Kat does something impulsive. Just as Lily takes her (sweet, sweet) time climbing over her, her hands shoot out to grab ahold of her waist, keeping her in place.
"Wha - ?" Lily looks confused only momentarily, before slapping at Kat's hands to no avail. "You bloody perv!"
There's no strength to Lily's efforts, so Kat takes this as motivation, hands holding onto Lily firmer, skin against skin and trying to not drown in how intoxicating it feels to have Lily on top of her like this.
Everything stops for a moment, Lily obviously realizing Kat isn't quite kidding around, stilling over her.
"We're both pissed right now," she says, gently, like it's just hit her.
"Quite rightly, I might add," Kathryn croaks out.
"Hmm," Lily hums, and it seems to reverberate through her body, Kathryn feeling a vibration against her stomach and it leaving her a puddle underneath the blonde. Lily reacts to whatever Kathryn's expression looks like, then, by scooping forward and pressing her lips to the hollow of her throat, tongue darting out into the dip there, eliciting a breathy moan.
This goes on for a few minutes, Lily's mouth devouring her neck and Kat barely keeping control over how her body is moving beneath her. Eventually, it's all she can do to not moan out: "God, I've been - been thinking about... about this."
Lily's movements slow, her breath coming out as a pant, "Yeah?"
There's the moistness of Lily's lips against her neck and Kat forgets for a long moment how to breathe. When she finally remembers, it's practically a moan.
This, this is what Lily stills at, lifts her head up just enough so that her nose brushes Kat's cheek and her hair tickles at her ears. She tilts her head a bit. "Like, all night?"
Kat does her best to catch her breath, to find some strength in her vioce. "For a... for a while."
It's dark, but the not-quite-a-smile on her lips is there. She looks like this when she has an idea, when she decides something. "For a while, eh?"
Kat can barely manage to nod her head when Lily shifts further down. Soon it's so that she's not simply kneeling over her, but straddling her, her hips fitting perfectly against Kat's and warmth overwhelms and Kat lifts her hips up into, against Lily's, and that's that for any coherent thinking.
Lily drops down to Kat's neck, tongue and teeth and lips against the rapid pulse she finds there. Her hands slide down Kat's side, bunch at the cloth of her tank and push up. By the time it's up to her chin, Lily's mouth has moved down a path to the dip between Kat's breasts.
Through all of this, she's arching her hips into Kat, teasingly slow and paced. Lily palms Kat's tits as she kisses a trail down her stomach, to the band of her polka dot knickers. She smiles against cotton at this discovery, and Kat's entire body hitches upward.
"Fuck, Lily, you're - !" There isn't a moment for her to catch her breath between her knickers being pulled off swiftly and the feel of Lily's tongue flat against her clit. One hand fists the sheets beside her while the other buries itself in Lily's hair. Nails bite into her scalp and in response, her tongue moves faster. There was nothing intelligible left for Kathryn to say, biting down on her bottom lip until she can taste blood.
Without pretense, Lily slips a finger inside of her, purposefully slow until she's fully inside her and everything freezes for just a moment. Kat has to convince herself that she knows how to breathe, and she does, it's nothing short of a guttural moan, and her entire body sinks into Lily.
It's when she can hear - feel - Lily moan against her that she knows she's done for.
Fuck, she thinks, can't say, can't hardly breathe. Fuck, fuck, each time with a rise of her hips against Lily's mouth, taking her finger - and the one that joins it - further inside her. Fuck. Fuck...
Lily's fingers curl inside her. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Her tongue moves faster against her clit. Fuck, fuck, fuck fuck fuckfuck.
The entire bottom half of her arches up off the bed, and Lily's there to hold her, no sympathy as her tongue continues to dance circles around her clit and her fingers move in and out and Kat looks down to see her looking back up, and this is when she comes, jerking against her mouth and knuckles and crying out.
A long time passes, it feels like, but then eventually everything starts to slow a bit, only the sound of her panting to occupy the room.
Lily's lips move against her again, this time more tender, like a kiss. She lowers Kat back down to the bed and pulls away, slowly, lips glistening. Her eyes flutter closed when she sticks both fingers in her mouth and reverently sucks them clean. Kat whimpers, doesn't care how pathetic the sound is and squirms against her. Lily drops her hand so that both are massaging the inside of Kat's thighs. Their eyes lock in a hazy gaze, and it's like this for the longest time.
Kat's hands travel down the quick rise and fall of her stomach as she attempts to catch her breath, fingers wrapping around the curve of Lily's hip, and this is when a peculiar look crosses Lily's face, the softness giving way to something else. "I think m'gonna...pass out...now."
She doesn't wait for Kat's reaction, rather matter-of-factly rolling onto her side of the bed, and facing away. Kat's left on her own, and when she sits up and looks over at her, sees her eyes are closed, quite legitimately passed out, she can't fight the sudden feeling of dread. She fights it off, blindly searching for her discarded knickers and then letting the alcohol hit her as well, knocking off into sleep.
TBC....