Public or Family?

[blisteringherb]

I was curious to find out whether or not folks feel like they need to "butch it up" more in front of their family or just when they're in public. I realize that a lot of people probably act the same all the time, but do you feel more pressure to act more masculine around family members?

Comments

[markitup]

i don't feel any pressure to be more masculine around my family or anyone for that matter. i am not a very butch guy at all. as i am gaining more comfort with myself i am finding that my masculinity isn't something that have to demand from other people, it is something that i own and cultivate and exhibit in life. my personal issues involve being a confident person more so than acting male. i hope this makes sense.

[bly_me]

can't say that i've had that experience. i'm not very 'butch' to begin with, though. i've always been a bit eccentric, so i think my expressions of masculinity have followed suit. since my family knows me pretty well, i don't think they were expecting me to become hyper masculine. i think they would've found it alarming. i understand the desire to have your family take your transition seriously, so you might feel like you hafta 'do it up' for them. but, is transition about changing your character? why be something you're not normally for someone else's approval? [these are rhetorical questions, i'm not implying that's what your doing]

the thing is, as transmen we have an opportunity to create our own masculinity any way we want. we don't necessarily have to keep acting out old and sometimes oppressive patterns of masculinity. if you're going to 'act' why not be subversive?

[tracksixtonine]

That's a pretty tough question.

Hmm, I guess I am pretty much the same around my family and friends. Only sometimes around all guy crowds, I do find myself cranking up the masculinity, but not to the point of over compensation.

For family members, I just act as I normally do around them. I think they know when I am "acting" so I avoid doing so.

[nightscribbler]

Only sometimes around all guy crowds, I do find myself cranking up the masculinity, but not to the point of over compensation.
Shh...this might be a secret, but I think even male-assigned people who identify as male do that. Actually, I read an article in my bio class that talked about social behaviors in mixed and segregated gender groups and this was found to be true among a lot of mammals, even humans.