[The camera suddenly comes on and shows Aurum the Pichu standing close to a Pokemon that has begun to glow. The brighter it gets, the more Aurum scoots away from it.]
Hey, anyone! Should I be finding something to hide behind because I swear this thing is about to explo-
[The glowing now dims, and instead of an egg, there's this guy -->]
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[Oh shit, Ed's watch! He scrambles to dig in his pocket to find it, and lo and behold, there it is! Untouched by the Pokemon.]
Well, that's a relief. Hey, Colonel!
Aroooon?
You don't eat this either, ok?
Ron.
[Ed faces the camera again.]
Sort of. It likes to eat metal...
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...Why would it be trying to eat you if it likes metal?
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Well, I have my watch. Also my automail.
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"Automail"?
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[Ed sighs. He keeps forgetting that most people here have no idea what automail is. He waves his hand at the camera.]
This.
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Oh, I see...a prosthetic of some kind? That would explain why he thought you were edible, I suppose.
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Yeah.
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Well, clearly you'll just have to explain to him that trainers are not to be eaten.
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We're gonna have to have a long talk, it seems.
Ooooooooon
[Colonel hobbles over to a stray metal pail with Aurum on his back and starts chomping.]
COLONEL!! STOP EATING THAT!!
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...He seems to have a healthy appetite, at least.
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He does, doesn't he?
[Colonel looks up and cocks his head. Ed squats down and gives him a stern look. Time for a lecture.]
Look, I know you're just a baby and everything, but you can't just eat whatever you feel like. That bucket wasn't yours, I need my automail to move, and I need my watch for when I get back to Amestris. If you get hungry, come to me and I'll find something for you to eat.
[Colonel gives no indication of whether or not he absorbed any of what Ed said. He just sits there and looks at the clouds passing by...]
Have any suggestions?
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