suck it and see.
title: suck it and see
author: futurebruises
pairing: krisyeol
rating: nc-17
length: 2200w, oneshot
genre: crack, smut, humor, rock star au
summary: kris convinces chanyeol to suck his dick when he insists it's something straight guys do in canada all the time. prequel to nature.
author's note: i didn't think i'd ever get around to filling this but i got a nice little mini-apocalypse vacation thanks to the floods and yeah ; A; this is really effin' cracky.
Yi Fan can make Chanyeol do anything.
It hits him when they’re both sweating after a tiny little club show in Busan, both of their bands opening for this pretty big five-piece outfit who are doing a return to the club circuit as a favor to the fans. These are the first sold-out shows either of them have ever played and it’s pretty cool. Yi Fan is playing seeing-eye dog, reading the bar menu for Chanyeol, who forgot his glasses. He figures out that the poor, gangly idiot will buy any word he says, so he starts having a little fun, and Yi Fan ends up nearly sponsoring Chanyeol’s second run-in with alcohol poisoning but still gets forgiven.
He could probably get Chanyeol to suck his dick with a little bit of convincing.
He’s so sure of this, in fact, that he makes a bet with Chanyeol’s band’s geeky little merch guy Jongdae over it. It might be a little insensitive, considering that he knows Jongdae’s had a huge crush on Chanyeol for the last twelve years or so, but Yi Fan just knows that he can get Chanyeol to suck his dick even though Chanyeol isn’t anywhere near gay.
Well, he can’t confirm that. Chanyeol just acts pretty sensible and straight most of the time, and while he might look really seductive while he smokes cigarettes between sets, that doesn’t mean anything. Also, Yi Fan will take any excuse he can get to make his own feats seem a little more impressive, so he bets Jongdae a few thousand won that he’ll turn Park Chanyeol, heterosexual guitarist extraordinaire, into his bitch for the night.
(Or at least get a blowjob out of him before he passes out.)
Jongdae scoffs in disgust but shakes his hand over it anyway. He’s been trying to pull that shit on Chanyeol for years and it’s never worked. He doesn’t know what this tall asshole has on him - definitely not facial structure, and Chanyeol’s said he likes short chicks better - so he shakes on it because he could use the money. Punk kids don’t tip terribly well, Minseok drools, Baekhyun snores, Chanyeol thrashes, and their single motel room is generally a really shitty place to sleep.
So the night that they play their second show in Busan, Yi Fan purposely hides Chanyeol’s glasses under the second backseat of the van and Chanyeol is blundering around, laughing like he does. Yi Fan can’t help the little thrill that slips through his stomach when Chanyeol’s already-drunk lips blindly brush his neck when he wishes him luck.
Yi Fan’s not the type to be fazed, but if he were, touches like that would definitely set him off. Instead, he’s just a little drunk on his power when he picks up his bass and plays, eyes steady on the point above the crowd, growling the occasional low notes into his mic. Kyungsoo howls away in the forefront while Yixing and Minseok’s guitars battle noisily. Zitao’s drumming backs them up, and while Yi Fan has never known if their music is very good or if their fans are, he knows that the awestruck look he gets from Chanyeol while they’re switching out equipment is totally worth the sweat.
He watches the other band’s set from backstage with a practiced disinterest, his eyes mostly focusing on the veins in Chanyeol’s arms and the way he bites his lip when he solos. Jongin shoves past him sweatily when the set ends. Jongdae smirks from the merch booth, prompting an aggressive wave in his face from some fangirl who means business, but Yi Fan catches the gesture.
It’s go time.
Chanyeol’s already lit a cigarette, so it’s not too hard for Yi Fan’s imagination to run wild. They both head to the bar. Chanyeol just bats his lashes when the big-eyed bartender points out a no-smoking sign. The pretty kid rolls his eyes. His nametag reads Lu Han and his hair is dyed an ugly, faded pink but he still seems to think he’s too good for this divey shithole.
Yi Fan chuckles and asks him in Mandarin if it’s true that drummers hit it harder, provoking a pink-faced scoff from the boy but no denial. Yi Fan smirks. He knew he’d seen Sehun with this guy last night, taking advantage of his recent eighteenth birthday.
Chanyeol shakes his head and orders two of whatever the hell the drink he had last night was.
Either he’s immune to hangovers or he wants to get shitfaced. It doesn’t matter to Yi Fan, because three drinks and forty minutes later, he’s got Chanyeol laughing like a hyena and clinging to his arm on the walk back to the motel.
Stage one of the plan that Yi Fan never really made is complete. Now he just has to get it up and get Chanyeol to suck him off.
It’s not too difficult to do. Chanyeol’s stripping off his sweaty shirt the second Yi Fan finds the room key, and while he’s mostly just lanky, pale skin and bones, his arms are nice and his hands are big and he really does have a habit of biting his lip when he thinks. He doesn’t have any tattoos and Yi Fan thinks he likes that.
Yi Fan can’t fathom what the hell he’s thinking about if he’s this drunk. Hell, even Yi Fan himself is feeling it, and he’s the fucking heavyweight champion when it comes to alcohol.
He decides to let Chanyeol come to him because he can’t be trusted not to make an ass out of himself if he’s already this tipsy. Luckily, Chanyeol becomes an overgrown puppy when he drinks, and Yi Fan only looks out at the view of the dirty beach for a few seconds before Chanyeol plops down next to him, graceless and naked but for his underwear.
“Whaddaya wanna do?” Chanyeol slurs, his hot breath on Yi Fan’s ear and his body draped halfway over Yi Fan’s. “Also, how’re you not… heated… hot… over-hot… ‘cause, yaknow… clothes…”
Yi Fan smirks. Chanyeol’s a really cute drunk.
“You can take ‘m off for me,” he shrugs. “It is pretty hot in here.”
Chanyeol frowns, his poor brain probably trying to compute the implications, and a few painful seconds pass before he settles, straddling Yi Fan’s chest with his eyes bright and starting on the buttons of his shirt.
Yi Fan’s the sort of person who could play a show in the flames of hell in a three-piece suit and not really be bothered by the heat, so this is basically just foreplay for him. Chanyeol’s fingers are pretty dexterous, all things considered. He inches his way down Yi Fan’s torso to move on from the shirt to the pants, eventually settling right about on his crotch to pull the shirt off.
Yi Fan wonders if this would be an inconvenient time to get hard, but it’s a little bit impossible not to because Chanyeol’s calloused fingers are accidentally spilling butterfly touches all across his chest and Chanyeol’s ass is inadvertently rubbing against his cock and hell, who can blame him?
Chanyeol doesn’t really seem to notice until he sits said ass back down on Yi Fan’s thighs to go about undoing his skinny jeans and is interrupted by the dick trying to break free therefrom.
His eyebrows furrow and he looks up at Yi Fan.
“Why’ d’ you have a boner?” he asks, his voice all soft and confused, and Yi Fan can’t believe he made this bet because Chanyeol is not a sexy person at all, just really adorable and really drunk.
Still, Yi Fan’s pride trumps his sentiment, and he shrugs, not letting the smirk off his lips or the drunken gold light out of his eyes. He wipes a finger along Chanyeol’s lower lip, stuck out in a nervous pout. “I dunno. Wanna help me out with it?”
“I’n’t that kinda… gay…?” Chanyeol asks, his face honestly confused, and Yi Fan grins because this is the key moment.
“What? No? It’s a thing… It’s a Canadian thing…”
Chanyeol cocks his head, a confused whimper escaping his throat. “Wha…?”
“Straight guys do it in Canada all the time. Suck each other’s dicks. It’s okay.”
“Nooooo, you’re trying to turn me gay. Jon’dae’s tried before! You can’t! I am straight! I am hetreo… hero… heretofore… heterosexy… sexual…”
He trails off and Yi Fan can barely keep a straight face. He’s got his lip between his teeth when he shakes his head.
“So am I, Yeollie. Doesn’t make it weird. We do this in Canada a lot. It’s totally cool.”
Chanyeol looks up at him with narrowed eyes, obviously trying to remember any evidence of Yi Fan’s gayness, but his memory must be pretty shot, because he just keeps unbuttoning Yi Fan’s jeans and then moving onto the black boxer-briefs, trying to figure out how best to go about this.
“Dude… I don’t even know how… how do you… dick…” he mumbles, drunk out of his mind as he mentally sizes up Yi Fan’s sizeable cock, opening and closing his mouth as if trying to figure out how to fit it in there.
Yi Fan would feel guilty if he had any human emotion left, but for now he’s just eager for victory. Also, Chanyeol has a pretty nice mouth. It’s been a while since Yi Fan got his dick sucked because the headliners have rules about groupies and Joonmyeon got pissed at him two weeks before they left for tour.
“I dunno, man, just, like, suck it.”
“… thought you said you do this a lot,” Chanyeol grumbles, and Yi Fan groans inwardly, but then Chanyeol’s knees are on the floor and his warm, wet mouth is on Yi Fan’s head and it gets really hard to have conscious thoughts.
Ha. Hard.
But it so happens that something in Chanyeol’s brain is wired to like the taste of dick or something or at least he can fit a lot of it in his mouth and Yi Fan is pretty damn happy he made that bet. What Chanyeol lacks in technique, he makes up for in stupid passion, working his lips around Yi Fan like he’s the last popsicle on the hottest day in summer.
Yi Fan really hopes, mostly for Jongdae’s sake, that Chanyeol doesn’t still think he’s straight after this.
“Mm, more tongue,” he hisses, and Chanyeol almost chokes when he tries to obey. Flashes of Chanyeol tied up and helpless spark through Yi Fan’s head and he bucks his hips inadvertently. Spit drips to Chanyeol’s chin as he gags, pulling off of Yi Fan’s dick for a second to catch his breath.
“Asshole,” he huffs, spitting precum and saliva onto the motel carpet before attacking Yi Fan’s cock with his tongue all over again.
Yi Fan is just confused now and he doesn’t understand why Chanyeol is still doing this but he’s close enough to his climax that he doesn’t feel like having a whole mental debate over it. Chanyeol shoves his hips with his hands and the callouses that stain his fingers because he’s too much of a purist to use a pick make it all the more enjoyable. Nobody’s brave enough to manhandle Yi Fan, but Chanyeol always has been a fearless idiot.
Not brave enough to swallow when Yi Fan comes on his lips, but brave enough to sloppily kiss Yi Fan and share the brunt of the taste. Yi Fan would be grossed out, but he figures it’s proper payback, and he’s also not quite as straight as Chanyeol seems to remember.
“That… that was really gay…” Chanyeol mumbles, wiping his mouth on his sleeve as his head spins.
“You didn’t seem to mind.”
Chanyeol shrugs and instantly regrets the movement, glaring at the stars in his eyes. “’m drunk. Now shuddup and suck me off before Sehun comes back with his stupid fuggin’ bartender.”
Yi Fan sighs and runs a hand through Chanyeol’s hair. He’s pretty sure Chanyeol will get plenty of head from Jongdae if he just plays his cards right, but the poor idiot kind of deserves this. He’s already hard in his boxers and Yi Fan figures it can’t take too long.
And so the ever-impassive Yi Fan lets a younger boy get the best of him but still wins the bet and Chanyeol decides he might not hate dick and Jongdae isn’t too pissed when he pays up, either, because Chanyeol starts talking to him a lot more, and Yi Fan decides to loosen his grip on Chanyeol. Just because he can make the poor kid do anything doesn’t mean he needs to. The hangover is pretty humbling too.
They pack up the next day, none too eagerly, and Chanyeol doesn’t find his glasses until they’ve been on the road for three hours and he’s trying to find food. He sees the glint in Yi Fan’s eye when he spits them clean and he cuddles up closer to Jongdae, glaring at Yi Fan in the driver’s seat.
“You know, you’re uglier than I remember.”
“That’s not what you were saying last night.”
Poor Jongdae nearly chokes on his water.
author: futurebruises
pairing: krisyeol
rating: nc-17
length: 2200w, oneshot
genre: crack, smut, humor, rock star au
summary: kris convinces chanyeol to suck his dick when he insists it's something straight guys do in canada all the time. prequel to nature.
author's note: i didn't think i'd ever get around to filling this but i got a nice little mini-apocalypse vacation thanks to the floods and yeah ; A; this is really effin' cracky.
Yi Fan can make Chanyeol do anything.
It hits him when they’re both sweating after a tiny little club show in Busan, both of their bands opening for this pretty big five-piece outfit who are doing a return to the club circuit as a favor to the fans. These are the first sold-out shows either of them have ever played and it’s pretty cool. Yi Fan is playing seeing-eye dog, reading the bar menu for Chanyeol, who forgot his glasses. He figures out that the poor, gangly idiot will buy any word he says, so he starts having a little fun, and Yi Fan ends up nearly sponsoring Chanyeol’s second run-in with alcohol poisoning but still gets forgiven.
He could probably get Chanyeol to suck his dick with a little bit of convincing.
He’s so sure of this, in fact, that he makes a bet with Chanyeol’s band’s geeky little merch guy Jongdae over it. It might be a little insensitive, considering that he knows Jongdae’s had a huge crush on Chanyeol for the last twelve years or so, but Yi Fan just knows that he can get Chanyeol to suck his dick even though Chanyeol isn’t anywhere near gay.
Well, he can’t confirm that. Chanyeol just acts pretty sensible and straight most of the time, and while he might look really seductive while he smokes cigarettes between sets, that doesn’t mean anything. Also, Yi Fan will take any excuse he can get to make his own feats seem a little more impressive, so he bets Jongdae a few thousand won that he’ll turn Park Chanyeol, heterosexual guitarist extraordinaire, into his bitch for the night.
(Or at least get a blowjob out of him before he passes out.)
Jongdae scoffs in disgust but shakes his hand over it anyway. He’s been trying to pull that shit on Chanyeol for years and it’s never worked. He doesn’t know what this tall asshole has on him - definitely not facial structure, and Chanyeol’s said he likes short chicks better - so he shakes on it because he could use the money. Punk kids don’t tip terribly well, Minseok drools, Baekhyun snores, Chanyeol thrashes, and their single motel room is generally a really shitty place to sleep.
So the night that they play their second show in Busan, Yi Fan purposely hides Chanyeol’s glasses under the second backseat of the van and Chanyeol is blundering around, laughing like he does. Yi Fan can’t help the little thrill that slips through his stomach when Chanyeol’s already-drunk lips blindly brush his neck when he wishes him luck.
Yi Fan’s not the type to be fazed, but if he were, touches like that would definitely set him off. Instead, he’s just a little drunk on his power when he picks up his bass and plays, eyes steady on the point above the crowd, growling the occasional low notes into his mic. Kyungsoo howls away in the forefront while Yixing and Minseok’s guitars battle noisily. Zitao’s drumming backs them up, and while Yi Fan has never known if their music is very good or if their fans are, he knows that the awestruck look he gets from Chanyeol while they’re switching out equipment is totally worth the sweat.
He watches the other band’s set from backstage with a practiced disinterest, his eyes mostly focusing on the veins in Chanyeol’s arms and the way he bites his lip when he solos. Jongin shoves past him sweatily when the set ends. Jongdae smirks from the merch booth, prompting an aggressive wave in his face from some fangirl who means business, but Yi Fan catches the gesture.
It’s go time.
Chanyeol’s already lit a cigarette, so it’s not too hard for Yi Fan’s imagination to run wild. They both head to the bar. Chanyeol just bats his lashes when the big-eyed bartender points out a no-smoking sign. The pretty kid rolls his eyes. His nametag reads Lu Han and his hair is dyed an ugly, faded pink but he still seems to think he’s too good for this divey shithole.
Yi Fan chuckles and asks him in Mandarin if it’s true that drummers hit it harder, provoking a pink-faced scoff from the boy but no denial. Yi Fan smirks. He knew he’d seen Sehun with this guy last night, taking advantage of his recent eighteenth birthday.
Chanyeol shakes his head and orders two of whatever the hell the drink he had last night was.
Either he’s immune to hangovers or he wants to get shitfaced. It doesn’t matter to Yi Fan, because three drinks and forty minutes later, he’s got Chanyeol laughing like a hyena and clinging to his arm on the walk back to the motel.
Stage one of the plan that Yi Fan never really made is complete. Now he just has to get it up and get Chanyeol to suck him off.
It’s not too difficult to do. Chanyeol’s stripping off his sweaty shirt the second Yi Fan finds the room key, and while he’s mostly just lanky, pale skin and bones, his arms are nice and his hands are big and he really does have a habit of biting his lip when he thinks. He doesn’t have any tattoos and Yi Fan thinks he likes that.
Yi Fan can’t fathom what the hell he’s thinking about if he’s this drunk. Hell, even Yi Fan himself is feeling it, and he’s the fucking heavyweight champion when it comes to alcohol.
He decides to let Chanyeol come to him because he can’t be trusted not to make an ass out of himself if he’s already this tipsy. Luckily, Chanyeol becomes an overgrown puppy when he drinks, and Yi Fan only looks out at the view of the dirty beach for a few seconds before Chanyeol plops down next to him, graceless and naked but for his underwear.
“Whaddaya wanna do?” Chanyeol slurs, his hot breath on Yi Fan’s ear and his body draped halfway over Yi Fan’s. “Also, how’re you not… heated… hot… over-hot… ‘cause, yaknow… clothes…”
Yi Fan smirks. Chanyeol’s a really cute drunk.
“You can take ‘m off for me,” he shrugs. “It is pretty hot in here.”
Chanyeol frowns, his poor brain probably trying to compute the implications, and a few painful seconds pass before he settles, straddling Yi Fan’s chest with his eyes bright and starting on the buttons of his shirt.
Yi Fan’s the sort of person who could play a show in the flames of hell in a three-piece suit and not really be bothered by the heat, so this is basically just foreplay for him. Chanyeol’s fingers are pretty dexterous, all things considered. He inches his way down Yi Fan’s torso to move on from the shirt to the pants, eventually settling right about on his crotch to pull the shirt off.
Yi Fan wonders if this would be an inconvenient time to get hard, but it’s a little bit impossible not to because Chanyeol’s calloused fingers are accidentally spilling butterfly touches all across his chest and Chanyeol’s ass is inadvertently rubbing against his cock and hell, who can blame him?
Chanyeol doesn’t really seem to notice until he sits said ass back down on Yi Fan’s thighs to go about undoing his skinny jeans and is interrupted by the dick trying to break free therefrom.
His eyebrows furrow and he looks up at Yi Fan.
“Why’ d’ you have a boner?” he asks, his voice all soft and confused, and Yi Fan can’t believe he made this bet because Chanyeol is not a sexy person at all, just really adorable and really drunk.
Still, Yi Fan’s pride trumps his sentiment, and he shrugs, not letting the smirk off his lips or the drunken gold light out of his eyes. He wipes a finger along Chanyeol’s lower lip, stuck out in a nervous pout. “I dunno. Wanna help me out with it?”
“I’n’t that kinda… gay…?” Chanyeol asks, his face honestly confused, and Yi Fan grins because this is the key moment.
“What? No? It’s a thing… It’s a Canadian thing…”
Chanyeol cocks his head, a confused whimper escaping his throat. “Wha…?”
“Straight guys do it in Canada all the time. Suck each other’s dicks. It’s okay.”
“Nooooo, you’re trying to turn me gay. Jon’dae’s tried before! You can’t! I am straight! I am hetreo… hero… heretofore… heterosexy… sexual…”
He trails off and Yi Fan can barely keep a straight face. He’s got his lip between his teeth when he shakes his head.
“So am I, Yeollie. Doesn’t make it weird. We do this in Canada a lot. It’s totally cool.”
Chanyeol looks up at him with narrowed eyes, obviously trying to remember any evidence of Yi Fan’s gayness, but his memory must be pretty shot, because he just keeps unbuttoning Yi Fan’s jeans and then moving onto the black boxer-briefs, trying to figure out how best to go about this.
“Dude… I don’t even know how… how do you… dick…” he mumbles, drunk out of his mind as he mentally sizes up Yi Fan’s sizeable cock, opening and closing his mouth as if trying to figure out how to fit it in there.
Yi Fan would feel guilty if he had any human emotion left, but for now he’s just eager for victory. Also, Chanyeol has a pretty nice mouth. It’s been a while since Yi Fan got his dick sucked because the headliners have rules about groupies and Joonmyeon got pissed at him two weeks before they left for tour.
“I dunno, man, just, like, suck it.”
“… thought you said you do this a lot,” Chanyeol grumbles, and Yi Fan groans inwardly, but then Chanyeol’s knees are on the floor and his warm, wet mouth is on Yi Fan’s head and it gets really hard to have conscious thoughts.
Ha. Hard.
But it so happens that something in Chanyeol’s brain is wired to like the taste of dick or something or at least he can fit a lot of it in his mouth and Yi Fan is pretty damn happy he made that bet. What Chanyeol lacks in technique, he makes up for in stupid passion, working his lips around Yi Fan like he’s the last popsicle on the hottest day in summer.
Yi Fan really hopes, mostly for Jongdae’s sake, that Chanyeol doesn’t still think he’s straight after this.
“Mm, more tongue,” he hisses, and Chanyeol almost chokes when he tries to obey. Flashes of Chanyeol tied up and helpless spark through Yi Fan’s head and he bucks his hips inadvertently. Spit drips to Chanyeol’s chin as he gags, pulling off of Yi Fan’s dick for a second to catch his breath.
“Asshole,” he huffs, spitting precum and saliva onto the motel carpet before attacking Yi Fan’s cock with his tongue all over again.
Yi Fan is just confused now and he doesn’t understand why Chanyeol is still doing this but he’s close enough to his climax that he doesn’t feel like having a whole mental debate over it. Chanyeol shoves his hips with his hands and the callouses that stain his fingers because he’s too much of a purist to use a pick make it all the more enjoyable. Nobody’s brave enough to manhandle Yi Fan, but Chanyeol always has been a fearless idiot.
Not brave enough to swallow when Yi Fan comes on his lips, but brave enough to sloppily kiss Yi Fan and share the brunt of the taste. Yi Fan would be grossed out, but he figures it’s proper payback, and he’s also not quite as straight as Chanyeol seems to remember.
“That… that was really gay…” Chanyeol mumbles, wiping his mouth on his sleeve as his head spins.
“You didn’t seem to mind.”
Chanyeol shrugs and instantly regrets the movement, glaring at the stars in his eyes. “’m drunk. Now shuddup and suck me off before Sehun comes back with his stupid fuggin’ bartender.”
Yi Fan sighs and runs a hand through Chanyeol’s hair. He’s pretty sure Chanyeol will get plenty of head from Jongdae if he just plays his cards right, but the poor idiot kind of deserves this. He’s already hard in his boxers and Yi Fan figures it can’t take too long.
And so the ever-impassive Yi Fan lets a younger boy get the best of him but still wins the bet and Chanyeol decides he might not hate dick and Jongdae isn’t too pissed when he pays up, either, because Chanyeol starts talking to him a lot more, and Yi Fan decides to loosen his grip on Chanyeol. Just because he can make the poor kid do anything doesn’t mean he needs to. The hangover is pretty humbling too.
They pack up the next day, none too eagerly, and Chanyeol doesn’t find his glasses until they’ve been on the road for three hours and he’s trying to find food. He sees the glint in Yi Fan’s eye when he spits them clean and he cuddles up closer to Jongdae, glaring at Yi Fan in the driver’s seat.
“You know, you’re uglier than I remember.”
“That’s not what you were saying last night.”
Poor Jongdae nearly chokes on his water.